The Crossroads of ‘Well, duh!’ and ‘No fucking shit?’
A review of ‘The Crossroads of Should and Must’ by Elle Luna
I read ‘The Crossroads of Should and Must’ and it made me roll my eyes so hard that they fell out of my head so now I’m sat here writing without eyes or blind drunk drinking whisky in my underwear and questioning my life choices; it’s hard to say really.
I was excited to read this book. It started life as a piece on Medium which went viral and was eventually expanded. Elle Luna is a designer-cum-artist who has inspired millions with the story of her path to success, choosing the ‘must’ of her art over the ‘should’ of her career, and how she pursued life as an artist. But the more I read the more I felt like I was missing something because it just seemed to state the bleeding obvious ad nauseam.
I keep thinking I should write snotty and sarcastic self-help books for people as bored, angry, cynical and jaded as I am but I’m afraid that only I would buy them. How about The Crossroads of ‘Well, duh!’ and ‘No Fucking Shit?’
After saving as much as I could I recently quit the ‘should’ of my job to pursue the ‘must’ of travel and writing. It would be putting it mildly to say that, since then, things haven’t gone according to plan.
I wanted to achieve Financial Independence — where you have enough money to live on without working — and I did so long as I die soon. I’m jobless (sorry ‘aspiring freelance’) and can get by for about 18 months so long I don’t mind being broke-ass poor and kill myself at the end.
All I ever wanted to be is a writer. So now I get to decide between whether I ‘should’ get another crappy soul-sucking job or ‘must’ somehow make a go of it as a writer. My feet are planted squarely at the crossroads of should and must. I should be exactly who this book is aimed at. So why don’t I love it?
It’s not like it’s bad advice: Find and follow your true passion. It’s not like reading it is a complete waste of time: It’s food for thought if nothing else. And it’s not like it’s badly written: You can breeze through it in one sitting.
So what gives?
Maybe it’s because it started out as a Medium article and probably should have stayed there. As I read it I kept thinking: “This is a blog post, not a book.” There’s very little how-to advice, lots of padding, and virtually nothing new of substance here that wasn’t already covered by the original post.
Maybe it’s because I didn’t relate to the author’s personal story — if you can afford to rent a space in San Francisco in which to paint then you don’t exactly have a problem — but that doesn’t seem fair. One person’s decision to create and pursue their art is as courageous as any other.
Or maybe it’s just because I’m a failure. I wanted to love this book but my own navigation of the crossroads hasn’t gone so well. I’ve driven my life into a ditch and I’m fucked if I know what I’m going to do next. Choosing to stand still, or do nothing, is still a decision; just not a particularly good one.
Should versus must is a false dichotomy. Our lives are full of should that we have to turn into must. If you don’t make your art a priority then it won’t get done. As Tony Robbins said: “Don’t should all over yourself.”
I probably should write nicer book reviews but I write this way because I must. It’s all I’ve got in me at the moment. Writing is easy. Writing is also hard. These should not be thought of as separate things.
When I was younger I used to think that NSFW (Not Safe For Work) stood for Now So Fucking What? That’s pretty much how I felt when reading this book.
Have you chosen between the roads of Should and Must? That’s great. Now So Fucking What?
James Garside is an independent journalist, author, and travel writer. Join Chapter 23 for the inside track on all their creative projects and insights about life, work, and travel.
About the Creator
James Garside
NCTJ-qualified British independent journalist, author, and travel writer. Part-time vagabond, full-time grumpy arse. I help writers and artists to do their best work. Let's be part of each other's stories. jamesgarside.net
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