Self-care is carpe diem!

For many years I believed self-care is picture-perfect routines, like something out of an Instagram post that glitters and glows. From skin routines that leave the face shiny to sparkles in flutes and workouts in bodysuits.

I tried it myself before with a list of things I wanted to improve in my life and how I would go about achieving them. I followed a routine that was suppose to bring me closer to my goals, my perfect health, and my livelihood. At first, it was great, everyone would agree that figuring out how to do what you thought you couldn’t... feels good! I felt great…. Until I had to deal with emotions I’ve never had to before, go through moments that I was never prepared for, and spend days with new thoughts on my mind.

I do not know about most people, but I was battling a personal crisis before the world crisis began and I've never been in a pandemic before.

At times, it isn't even something new or negative, just a slight change in my behavior, mood, health, or ability affects me a lot. Especially when I compare it to the preconceived idea of how my days should plan out.

I had to accept that what should have been a 2-hour workout by 8 am, green tea by 10 am turned out more like staying in bed until the afternoon and having ice cream for breakfast.

When you are ‘not on your A-game’ as many would describe it. But what exactly is an A-game? When I was taught to use one method to solve all problems. I could be part of the group of people that thrive on readjusting resolutions when necessary and not sticking to a plot that twists me then I have to start all over again... -the next year-.

Think of it as a school: The point of all the different subjects is to know different aspects of learning, comprehension, and evaluating and solving. In this case, what self-care rituals work for you? only you would know.

At times, we're focused on chasing end products, looking at the finish lines of our routines in a year, and not analyzing the 356 days we have to go through to get there. Self-care has been defined as the process of taking care of oneself with behaviors that promote health and active management of illness when it occurs. Therefore, I argue that self-care is what you need at that present moment.

Individuals engage in some form of self-care daily with food choices exercise, sleep, and dental care. Most of the time these activities are planned and promote control, all the time instead of in-time in a world full of uncertainties. e.g the pandemic, hello!?

Recently, I practiced the simplicity of self-care with what I enjoy, a good stretch and a calming playlist because those are habits I’m almost always in the mood for. Music is my love language and stretching feels like a reboot from hefty emotions, just like an 'AMEN' after a silent prayer.

That's why I'm convinced self-care is the process of being tender, loving, and careful with yourself just how you need to be in that moment. What it is not, is a list that limits living in the moment.

Don't get me wrong, sometimes self-care is staying disciplined and committed to achieving what you want the most. Please remember not to ignore the days 'self' needs something different.

I used to beat myself up for not working out as regularly, feel guilty for eating something I 'mutha-licking' enjoyed. All because I was living my life for the results of the resolution and not the process that gets me there with care and not 'force'

My new year resolves to trust my intuition and listen to it because it said what it said! When it tells me, today we have no energy for a wash day we planned three weeks ago... I'm postponing it before I spend my day dreading for hours while the reflection looks back and smirks "I told you so."

Not in 2022! Carelessness will be part of my vital self-care. That's freedom of mind right there!