Role Models

We all have them—regardless of if we go looking or they fall into our lives. Almost as idols, they inspire us. We hold these people in such high regard and so easily forget that they are human like everyone else.

For many of us, our first heroes and role models are our parents. It’s something of a milestone when we realize that they are just human beings trying to do their best.

Years ago, now, I looked into the lives of public figures that are widely seen as heroes. Moral guardians of how people should act and how they carry themselves. Gandhi, Mother Theresa and even a hero I held very close to my heart as a child—the immortal Hulk Hogan.

The closer I looked into people I idolized, my heroes, the more things I saw in them that I really didn’t like. It lead me to ask myself, "Do my heroes do more damage than good? Should I even see them as role models?"

No human is simply one dimensional. We are a complex bag of mixed emotions, ideas, dreams and beliefs. So, what if someone turns out to be such a bad person, is it worth listening to anything they say or anything that they have said?

Having this go round and round in my head for a few years, I think it’s more important to take aspects from these people. Gandhi did some questionable things, and yet his message of peace and trying to destroy the class system is something that lasts and resonates throughout the years.

So, is it important what he did that was questionable? Are his actions that I could not support excusable?

My greatest hero and biggest influence on me is a man who was troubled with so many demons. He was a man that turned a shy and scared boy and gave him a glimpse at what being a "real man" was all about.

Unlike anyone I had every know, this man would wear women's jeans because they had flowers on- and he simply liked flowers. He didn’t care what anyone else thought about him or what he wore. By contrast, I was too scared to wear any clothing that wasn’t black. Yet this man, long hair, over weight, bright colors, big glasses and a walk that told everyone how little their opinions of him meant.

Yet, regardless of how I think of that man, he suffered from demons that got the better of him. So does this mean I should throw out everything he taught me?

Of course not. Our heroes are human. They are people. They are you and me. What they teach us, that’s what matters. What they show us and the lessons passed on, these are all the things that we should take on.

Never ignore that parts of them that we don’t like or that we question, but take the lessons are remember the image of what the person meant to you.

The best things my hero gave to me were hope and strength. He made me see the good in people, regardless of how bad things get. There is always hope.

I hope to be as strong as I saw him. And I hope I can show others that strong people can be weak. That strong people fall down. That strong people are just that; people. But more than anything else, strong people know that it’s okay to not be strong all the time.

In short, I take the lessons my heroes teach me.

The person they were was never the lesson.