New Year Resolutions

Every. Single. Year

It's the same old story. 31st December comes and we are all making these amazing goals for the next year. Lose weight, get a job, get a dog (this should always be on a list), work out 5 times a week. You get the theme. January kicks in and for about five days, for the most part, you keep the new year resolutions and then suddenly you stop doing dry January because there was a huge night out that could not be missed.

This year, I wanted to do things differently. And this got me thinking, why do new year resolutions not last? Why after a week of clean eating, no alcohol and unlimited motivation do most of us give up? I assumed it's because I just wasn't determined enough in previous years to do these things. On my journey of self-development and awareness, I suddenly realised, it’s the motivation for WHY you are doing these resolutions.

I started my resolutions before the New Year. I had a very "if not now, when?" attitude. I became more aware of my actions and why I was doing them. I assessed whether I was working out to feel good, or just to lose weight. It was very easy to realise it was to feel amazing about myself, every single day. If I had thought "I am working out to lose 6 pounds by the end of December”, but I didn't, I would have been put down. I would have lost my motivation, and I know this from experience.

I have obsessed over my weight for years. I would obsess over how my body look, how many rolls did I have? Could these people on the beach see my cellulite? I would find myself sitting in the most uncomfortable positions because I wanted to look toned and slim. So, when I would jump on the scales, and not have lost three pounds or so, I would punish myself by cutting out another of my favourite foods until I found myself on five hundred calories per day.

I was miserable and wanted to change something. And it started with a simple thought. Something I thought to be so simple but, in reality proved much harder to execute. I had to wake up every day and tell myself I'm beautiful and losing weight wasn't something I NEEDED to do. What I needed to do was to change my thinking, how I viewed myself and my motivations for my actions.

I always wanted to look like the models with the flat stomachs, and flawless skin all over. But why did I want to be anyone else other than me? The truth is, I didn’t. I just needed to learn to love myself again. I needed to learn that it’s okay to have rolls when I sit down, have frizzy hair from bed and to not have flawlessly airbrushed skin. I needed to learn to be unapologetically me.

This was NOT an easy task and some days were so hard to look in the mirror and say, "I am beautiful" (this is where I would write in on a post-it notes and stick in on the mirror). No matter if I had a huge breakout, frizzy bed hair or make up smudged on my face, I would still say it to myself and it became a habit. After indulging in this for a while, other mantras came naturally.

I found myself making sure to acknowledge that I am a woman, my body is constantly changing, no sizing on a label should ever determine how you feel about yourself. Currently, there are size eight to fourteens hanging in my wardrobe. Everybody fits every piece of clothing slightly differently. With this I changed my motivation for my actions. I didn't work out to lose weight, I worked out to feel good. It was possibly the most enlightening process. As soon as I got on the mat to make my body feel good, my mind felt good. I looked in the mirror and sometimes said "damn girl" - and there should be no one on earth that makes you feel like you cannot love yourself.

A couple of weeks past and I was discovering more about self-development. The mind and body are linked. Feeding your mind good and positive thoughts will make your body feel amazing. Likewise, if you feed your body with the nutrients and love it craves, the mind will feel amazing. You may want to get in to shape and lose a few pounds but, you shouldn't neglect your mental health. Feed your mind with all the positivity you can find and over time it will continue to grow.

Every body is a bikini body and every body is beautiful. Don't make your goal to "look better" or to be a certain size. Make your goal to develop your self love. Take the new year and make it the year to start loving yourself. Every dent, every bit of cellulite, everything you think is an imperfection makes you who you are. You should never change that.

Just start by waking up in the morning and telling yourself; "I am beautiful, I am worthy, I am talented". Whatever it is that you need to hear, tell YOURSELF. This is your year and I have now prescribed you unlimited self love.

Happy 2020!