Making Changes

By Labor Day of 2011, it had been a pretty rough year.

In the beginning of the year, I had been cheating on my girlfriend of five years and finally got what I deserved.

Not only did I lose my girlfriend, but I lost many of my friends because they, naturally, sided with her over the cheating scumbag that I had been.

In hindsight, I tell myself that I did it because I knew the relationship wasn’t destined to work long-term and I didn’t have the courage to end it, but that still doesn’t make it right in any way.

So, over the summer, being “free,” I ran around the Jersey Shore chasing women.

This was hollow fulfillment.

And while I had been really enjoying myself at the beach almost every weekend and taking a couple days to recover at the beginning of each week, my performance at my corporate job was really beginning to slip.

Now, nearing the end of the summer, my boss explained to me that the bosses at corporate were getting concerned about my sales numbers not being up to par.

Great… Now work, too...

Then, after months of not talking to one of my roommates because of what I did to my girlfriend, it finally boiled over.

He came home drunk on a weeknight and started picking a fight with me over how terrible I had been to my girlfriend.

All I wanted to do was de-escalate the situation.

I knew he was just drunk.

After dodging a couple drunken punches he threw and trying to stop him, he threw one that clipped the top of my head.

As if it was a reflex, I popped up and clocked him square in the cheekbone.

He hit the ground hard.

I held him down and told him that he had to stop now.

When I let him up, he went off to his room.

After a few minutes, there was a stern knock at the door.

He answered the door to greet a couple of police officers who were responding to a domestic dispute call by a neighbor.

By law, when responding to a domestic dispute call, if they have reason to believe there’s been an altercation, they are required to arrest someone.

The first thing they saw was his swollen cheekbone, so they came right over and arrested me.

Thankfully, after a couple of hours, my roommate told them he didn’t want to press any charges and they let me go.

That weekend was Labor Day weekend, and I was focused on forgetting about my troubles and ending the summer on a high note.

It didn’t disappoint.

The day after Labor Day, I had a meeting out in Pennsylvania with a client and got a late start, so I was driving quickly.

Nearing the western border of New Jersey, it started raining.

It got harder…

And harder…

This was a 65mph zone, but I was down to about 55 in the left lane.

As I reached the top of a hill and began going downhill, a large 18-wheeler starting passing me from the middle lane.

If you’ve ever passed or been passed by a large truck on the highway, you know that you can sometimes feel the wind push you from the draft of the truck.

Well, in the same instant that gust of wind pushed me, I was blinded by a blast of water from under his wheels.

And that gust of wind pushed me just enough to get me hydroplaning.

Time slowed down to a crawl…

I started to spin counter-clockwise—first seeing the guard rail and then continuing to come around and see the back wheels of the truck’s trailer.

At this point, the hood of my car was heading right underneath the trailer.

And the back wheels of the trailer were lining up to run right over my car.

My life began to flash before my eyes.

First, I told myself, it all made sense—everything that I thought I knew in my life had been breaking down.

Lost my girlfriend…

Lost most of my friends…

And things were falling apart at my job…

I saw quick flashes of my family members and close friends.

And found this peaceful serenity come over me.

Unconsciously, I thought, "Ok, this is it… I’m going to die..."

The hood of my car went under the trailer and I was looking straight at the back wheels that were going to run me over.

And by some grace of God, when the top of my car’s door hit the bottom of the trailer, I bounced out.

Because the car was still hydroplaning, the car bounced off the trailer like a hockey puck.

Everything sped back up and, in an instant, my car bounced off the guard rail and kept spinning down this hill while the truck sped past.

At the bottom of the hill, my tires caught some traction and I smashed into a side wall.

After bouncing off the wall, my car finally came to a stop between the left and center lanes.

My survival instincts kicked in and I quickly realized that I was sitting at the bottom of a hill, in the pouring rain, at 9 AM after a holiday weekend, in the left two lanes of a highway.

Without thinking, I threw the car in park, turned the engine off, turned the flashers on and popped the trunk. I looked in my rearview to see cars screaming down the hill.

I had to throw a shoulder into the door to get it opened and went straight for my trunk.

The brightest thing I could find were my bright orange Rugby cleats, which I used to wave at traffic while running up the side of the highway and dialing 911.

I wish I could’ve heard the 911 tape, because I probably sounded like a play-by-play announcer as I told the 911 operator about a car coming down the hill.

"She doesn’t see me.

She’s not slowing down...

She’s getting closer!

Slamming on her brakes!

And she’s SMASHED into my car..."

After coming to my senses, I realized that there wasn’t a scratch on me. Also, thankfully, the woman who hit my car wasn’t hurt either.

Oh yeah, and that truck never stopped...

The next couple of days really shook me to my core.

I had accepted death.

I hadn’t even reached my 26th birthday yet and I had been ready to die.

It really caused me to take stock of my life and my choices and make some changes.

I decided to quit lying to people, including myself. I was always trying to be everything to everybody and look at where it had gotten me.

I finally decided that if people couldn’t accept me for who I really am, I’d be better off without them in my life.

I also decided to visit California, like I’d always wanted.

That trip inspired me to quit my corporate job and start my own company.

But before diving into the company, I decided to go backpack through Australia for a few months, which I had always wanted to do.

It took a near-death experience for me to realize that the most important thing I could do was to be true to myself about who I really am and what I’m meant to do in this world.

Those choices have set me on this amazing trajectory I’ve been on, and I wouldn’t change it for the world.

Thankfully, now, it doesn’t take a near-death experience for me to make changes in my life. I’m in tune with my intuition.

I hope my sharing this story inspires you to make the changes in your life that you know you need to make, but you’re scared of the consequences.

People might not understand, but no one knows you better than you.