Little Black Book

My mother kicked me out the house again. Once at fourteen, a few days before my 15th birthday,on my 18th birthday, and now two years later a few weeks before my 21st. Coincidentally, it seemed to happen simultaneously around my birthday. Great birthday gifts, right? The universe really does work in mysterious ways, I guess. It did hurt having a mother who’s first instinct is to abandon me, when she’s literally all I have. I’ll miss my seven siblings. “At least I know that they’ll be fine at home with her. “ I thought, as I wiped my tears off my face. I stare down at my tan hands with a blank mind. It’s cold outside during this New York City winter, but all I can really think about is what am I going to do now. I look at my phone and I see texts from my mother. She’s asking for the address to send all my belongings to from Houston. “Also I have some journals in the top drawer in Mina’s room. Can you send that too?” I respond. Mina is my younger sister. I know she’s happy she has her room back to herself again. In those two journals is where I write all my intentions and manifestations in. They’re very important to me. I look into my phone camera. Big brown eyes, big pink lips, and thick eyebrows look back at me. I smile. Why am I thinking about how cute I am at a time like this? Whatever. Katanna, my best friend for years says that I can live with her, her mother, and younger sister. It’s astonishing how a woman who didn’t even birth me can care more about me more than my own mother. However, Katanna and I have been planning on getting an apartment and living together so it seems as if this is the universes way of formulating our plan. I just wish it happened more on a good note and when I was ready to leave my mothers house. I am going to miss that big beautiful house in South Houston suburbs. I wrote a lot of good songs in that house too. My mother doesn’t really see my music career as something worthwhile. She rather me go to college and become a nurse. While I do not see an issue with that, I’m more of a business woman. I’ve been rapping since I was a child and I know that this is for me. I can feel it. I hop on the bus to head over to Katanna’s house. The bus looks like every other MTA bus, but something about this bus just looks different. Not physically but energetically. When I walk on the bus the driver smiles at me. Weird. That never happened before. I smile back and walk to the back of the bus where I always go. The bus is empty. The energy inside the bus is different too. I’ve rode MTA for almost 21 years of my life and I’ve never felt any vibrations like this before. I take my seat. “I wish me and my mothers relationship was better.” I think to myself. Now my brain is running with both negative and positive thoughts. From, “Everything happens for a reason” to “Why does it feel like my own mother doesn’t like me?” Meaninglessly, I start to look around the empty bus. I look at the bus driver. He winks at me. I fake a smile back. I sigh, and look down at the ground and I see a book. A little black book. Any other time If I was to see anything in public I would mind my business and avoid it. A New Yorker’s instinct. This time my intuition was telling me to pick up the book. I bend over and pick up the book staring at the cover. It’s leather, and worn down. I wonder if it’s the bus drivers book? No it’s yours. A voice in my head quickly assures me. I open up the book. The first page is gold words written in ink. “It’s already yours”. It’s says Interesting. I flip to the next page. It’s blank. I look up at the bus driver. He looks back at me in the rear-view. I look back down and magic words quickly fill the page. “Change is coming”. I look at my phone it’s 2:22pm. I flip to the next page. “Aylani what do you want this very moment”. A gold pen magically forms from the book and drops on my lap. I drop the book. Not out of fear but out of confusion. Am I dreaming? Did I fall asleep on the bus? I think to myself. This cannot be happening. I stare at the bus driver. He’s smiling. “Okay...” I say to myself. I pick up the book and the gold pen. In it I write, “I want 20,000” and I sign my name. The book starts to shake and suddenly disappears in thin air. Right in my hands. This is definitely a dream. A notification comes to my phone. I drop my phone. I’m still sort of paranoid. Chase bank. I open up the app. “20,000 has been deposited into your bank account.” No way. I think. I call customer service. “Your account balance is 20,000.” the automated voice says. It’s my stop. I knock on Katanna’s door. Am I dreaming? No. That same voice reassures me again. Katanna opens the door. I hug her. “We’re getting our apartment. I’m going to the studio. The universe really does work in mysterious ways....”