Leave the comfort zone

I’ve lived such a comfortable life. I was a full-time student studying nutrition in Edinburgh. I had a partner who was willing to do anything for me and a part-time job I loved to bits, that even challenged me.

Yet, I was not happy. The ‘loving relationship' I was in wasn’t so loving, more like unbalanced and unhealthy and the constant need of amazon searches for what to buy was a hidden clue behind my emptiness inside. But hey, I was comfortable, safe and reasonably satisfied just because I was fulfilling my wanderlust and excitement behind small materialistic nonsense.

Probably what you’re doing now and I don’t blame you the Western, capitalistic lifestyle has all of us in one bag hyped about anything new and advanced that comes out even though we have a perfectly functioning house full of gadgets and other unnecessities at home, a.k.a luxurious life that is making us slowly but surely melancholic.

And so I got thinking and gradually reached the level of, ‘Enough is enough!’

I ended my relationship, graduated, booked a return ticket to Thailand and prepared myself for stepping out of my comfort zone.

They say life begins at the end of your comfort zone. But, what is this sooo popular comfort zone?

The Oxford dictionary defines this unwanted noun as a situation where one feels safe or at ease.

Safe? Unease?

That certainly doesn’t sound too shabby so why step out of it?

Well, there is another definition that describes a comfort zone as a settled method of working that requires little effort and yields only barely acceptable results.

While feeling safe is good, more than good it doesn’t help us to progress with anything, so leaving this tight, little zone we gradually create is only for the better.

With one backpack and a heart full of excitement and fear I got on that plane and 18 hours later arrived in Bangkok. It was morning and my flight to Koh Samui didn’t fly until late at night that day so I had all day to either wait at the airport or go see Bangkok. Now, this was a good couple of years back when Thailand backpacking was just at the beginning of the big boom that it is now.

Luckily I ended up sitting next to a Croatian guy who was moving to Thailand and had a friend already living and working in Bangkok. One word led to another and I ended up spending all day with them. I dropped my bags at the other guys' home and they showed me all kinds of places in Bangkok, from temples to local underground bars, to delicious food and more.

By the end of my very first day in Asia I was mind blown by the culture, food, traffic, architecture, you name it. This exotic country fell right in my heart and I knew that all the complicated decisions I had to make before were worth the hassle, fear, and pain.

I first had to find a zone of courage that will help me, guide me to make the right choices for myself. I wasted four years with this guy just because I cared about him and his mind was aware of it and, especially towards the end, he was psychologically manipulating me. It’s no fun to figure out who you are if you have to constantly adjust to someone else who doesn’t let you grow and flourish.

While sending a relationship after 4 years is no piece of cake to handle (especially if the family gets involved), you have to stay strong and remind yourself CONSTANTLY what is important and healthy for you.

You will face all kinds of terror that you will do everything to avoid until you grow a set and tell yourself, ‘My body is a machine!’, and so is your mind...haha that is actually my favourite quote from the Working moms series.

Secondly, you need to feel comfortable with being vulnerable, which I still struggle with but moving forward and accepting that failure is one of the options is very crucial when leaving your comfort zone. Why? Because there is no great achievement and satisfaction from the easy goals. If everything would be simple there would be no adventure in living.

And so, take it one step at a time. I’ve been working on moving out of my comfort zone for 3 years now and I am nowhere close to the finish line but when I compare my last 3 years to any other time of my life, I smile and feel proud for taking over and creating my very own happiness by stepping out of my comfort zone.

That one trip to Thailand, ended up with me not getting on the plane back to the UK, instead, I continued my backpacking in Vietnam where I ended up living and teaching English for three years. Where I met the love of my life, inner peace, and numerous beautiful souls I call friends for life.

And so, just simply go for it, listen to what you want, do it and be scared as it is natural but don't be controlled by your own fears...step out and feel alive every day.