How to be Happy

If you're reading this it's probably because you are unhappy with an aspect (or all) of your life currently. Find yourself saying "if only I was.."? Do you have days where you struggle to feel good? This article is to help people who need a little help identifying road-blocks to their own personal happiness.

Welcome to a new day.

#1 Seek Professional Help

If you are struggling with depression or any other behavioral issues, please look out guidance from a licensed professional. They are more equipped to handle your own personal situation. If you are not sure if you need to see a mental health specialist talk to your doctor about what you are feeling.

#2 Talk to a Friend

Feelings of unhappiness often stem from feelings of loneliness. Having a bad day? Take a friend out to diner! Call a pal to vent out your feelings! Text a bro just to check-in! Humans are social creatures if they are not getting enough communication, feelings of anxiety, and separation from society can set in. Combat this by, hanging out with friends! Your busy schedule not allowing you any fun? Find simple solutions, like calling a friend on the commute to work, creating a study date with a pal, or have a meal together. (everyone has to eat). All in all, keep your friends close and just have fun.

#3 Get your finances under control

Not what you were expecting? Understanding your financial situation and how to properly take care of it will help you create a more stable life. You need a solid foundation before you can start building. Creating a budget and staying on top of bills will make a solid ground for you to stand on while you continue to build your happiness.

#4 Pursue a hobby you love/learn something new

Now, this doesn't have to be your most burning passion, just something you enjoy. You may not aspire to win the World Cup but you enjoy kicking the football around with your friends. Depending on your finances you can choose from more frugal options like shooting hoops on the weekends or more expensive endeavors like taking a college course. If you are having a hard time coming up with anything, check out the list below!

- read a novel

-exercise (jogging, strength training, swimming, etc.)

-creative writing

-etc

I think for most people the year 2020 so far has seemed like a bust, for me it certainly has. I hated the person I was. It wasn't until I went home for the summer that I found myself again. I was going through an old box of mine and found all the old diaries I wrote growing up.

Leafing through the pages of my past lead me to an epiphany; I lost sight of who I was. All this time I thought the person I was was the person I've always been and my past is to blame for my discontent. I used to be happy, like actually waking up excited for the day kind of happy. Then I entered into my angry teenage phase...which I never seemed to grow out of.

I told myself I was only unhappy in college because of current situations but in reality, I was clinging to depression simply because it was a habit. So, I had to reteach myself how to find joy in everyday life. Reading my diaries reminded me that I LOVE writing/reading. I used to bring a novel with me everywhere I went and read at every oppurtunity. That made me happy, over the moon in fact. Yet, I don't remember the last time I read a book other than a textbook.

Along with my diaries were albums of pictures. These contained mostly awkward poses with middle school friends and swim team photos. I was crazy about swimming but stopped when I headed off for college cause "I was too busy". (in reality, I wasn't)

After closing up that old box filled with mementos of my childhood, I felt a chill pass through my body, "Why on earth would I stop doing almost everything that I enjoyed for 4 years?" I still don't know the answer to that question but I knew in the very moment that I wasn't going to continue this pattern of self-maltreatment for another second.

I ransacked the bookstore and dug out my swimsuits from the back of a dresser. I know what makes me happy and I have always known, for whatever reason, I chose not to remember for a long time.

Now, I'm not going to pretend that I just shouted into the heavens "No more! From now on I'm happy!" and BOOM! my depressive thoughts evaporate, never to be seen again. That's not how things work. The transition was difficult. I had a lot of bad days that pulled me down into a dark, unforgiving place. Climbing out of that hole was emotionally draining and any effort I made to feel good felt fake.

Despite the hours I spent staring at the ceiling, seemingly spiraling out of control, with time I felt better. My bad days started to feel not so bad afterall. The saying, "fake it until you make it" was true in my situation. I stopped watching the ceiling fan spin and filled my time with productive projects. It was gradual but with steady improments. For the first time in years, I can actually say that I am enjoying life. It's not because of my change of environment but of a change of heart.

Don't expect to slay all your dragons in a single night. This is a l o n g process.

Go find yourself.