Criticism

There is always one or the other thing for which we are criticised, it can be our habits or maybe our behaviour towards people. There was a girl who was earlier very soft hearted, used to believe what people say to her, nod with a little soft smile in front of people then take everything to her heart and cry whole night. This was the routine of the girl, yes daily routine but then suddenly she became carefree, she understood everyone is a evil in someone's story and she might be someone's too. She set her free from all these criticism, mean compliments which were born from people's own self doubt. But how did this drastic change came into her life?

What was that which eventually made her forget and forgive everyone and to focus on herself ?

She was always a very opinionated girl, a rebellious one as the society depicts. She was always told to fly less basically to fit herself in her shoes and not beyond them. She used to question everything, every ritual, every belief, every faith with totally a different mindset which was quite different from the people's mindset so some of the people were always shocked and they used to keep quite but some people don't mind there business and they speak up in between, "ohh girl, you shouldn't say this, you are so small, girls shouldn't be like this" and then that little girl again have a question "why cannot girls be like this?" so basically she was considered uncultured but earlier it used to affect, she used to think if we speak then also we are wrong and if we don't then they say that we don't speak. The she understood that people are like this, they will always jump into someone's else life or conversation without an invitation.

Sometimes it was easy for her to hear to them but sometimes they used to lower down her self esteem. Self esteem is a fragile thing and cannot be always stable. Criticism can affect you badly if you allow it to. They can make you doubt yourself like she started to do.

She started to feel like she is untalented, unskilled, unassertive, unattractive and even unworthy.

But then she read

"NOBODY CAN MAKE YOU FEEL INFERIOR WITHOUT YOUR CONSENT" -Eleanor Roosevelt.

This little quote made her realize all that people were able to hurt her because she was allowing them too but if she starts to ignore or start appearing that she don't care than they will not be able to pull her down.

But unfortunately it wasn't easy.....

because she pretended to become a cold person from outside but from inside nothing changed her for few months.

But after few months she realized that doesn't care about anything now. She understood that now people are missing her old version but she changed for herself.

She understood the real and deep meaning of self-esteem that it is of so much value that we place it respectfully on ourselves and it's a feeling.

Critics are the people generally who are unhappy, unbalanced people who want to stand tall by trampling the self respect of other people they think that they can crush it under their foot.

If you are allowing people to crush your self esteem then you are giving them permission to rule your life. We all need to understand that we are individuals, with different behaviors, qualities .

Criticism is an unpleasant phenomenon. It doesn't matter where it comes from and where ever it comes from doesn't let it take over you, don't let it make your own environment toxic. It is a destructive force.

Your thinking should make you emotion free in this case. It takes a lot of time to control your emotions, aggression over such topics but it really helps in life then.

If criticism comes from a single person then ignore it but if it comes from a group of people then it maybe valid too. Then you should work on it to improve yourself on it with the passage of time. This type of criticism is constructive for yourself.

So accordingly we should analyze, not all criticism are negative but all are also not positive.

Thank you.