Can Fate Be Defeated by Wisdom?

I'm a typical Asian girl, and I have beliefs inherited from my culture. To name a few, astrology, horoscope, and numerology. We read horoscopes as soon as a new baby is born. We are even curious to know when we will die. A little strange, isn't it?

When I was young, my father gave me a numerology book. It said, I'm naturally motivated in astrology and can become an astrologer if I want to. To some extent, what the book said was true. I do believe in the planets' effect on our daily life. But my logical brain is as good as my cultural beliefs. Because of that, I seek proof for everything.

This is how these two contradicting ideas shaped my life.

Loneliness enters my life.

I aced in a nationwide exam when I was ten, and I got the opportunity to study in a prestigious school in my country. But I had to live away from my parents at such an early age. Ten is too small for a child to live alone.

I lived in a boarding house, and the loneliness was cruel for a good long two years. It was new for me. It wasn't surprising that I couldn't do my studies at all. The principal of the school will honor students who performed well on exams. Receiving the report from the principal is a dream for many students. It has a "Commanded Report" stamped on it. I am nowhere near the mark.

The aunt in my boarding house insulted me sometimes. She compared me with others and yelled at me very often. For me, I was progressing. My kind father knew about what I was going through and changed me to a new ladies' hostel. I was thirteen by then.

A lovely beginning in the ladies hostel

My time in the ladies' hostel was the most precious in my life. I did well in my studies and brought myself to the 14th rank from 41 in the class. Sadly, there was nobody to appreciate me. I felt ignorant and inferior.

But it was also a fantastic opportunity to be more self-motivated. I didn't care what others think about me. I studied, studied, and studied. Nothing else could distract me from what I wanted. There wasn't much work in the hostel to distract me either. I kept saying to myself, "good luck next time."

I turned fourteen. I studied harder than before, slept less, and lived eating what the hostel gave. Also, I stopped blabbering with others. I learned every second, not even wasting the little breaks I had in school. The girl who had the first rank before came to me. She said, "can you please give up on two subjects so that I can be the high-scorer in them?" I felt a little proud that day. For the first time, I see others consider me as their classmate.

An unfortunate happened

I had a fever during the exams and had to stay in bed. I was only able to do four of the ten exams. I was last in my class. I can not forget the day my then class teacher blamed me in front of everyone and gave me the report. I felt sorry and ashamed. I had a class teacher who doesn't know that I was studying hard. That day, I cried, screamed, and asked God, "why troubling me so much?" I got fed up and didn't do any exams well that year.

The battle against Saturn

At the age of 15, the horoscope turned scary. It predicted that Saturn entered my zodiac sign, and the next two and a half years would be miserable.

"Oh, God! What have you planned on my future?" I said to myself. I decided to apply the same trick I learned in the years before - study hard.

I came from poor family background. Some of the wealthy children in my class laughed at me for studying even on little breaks. I couldn't make friends with them. I cried alone for many days. I thought all this happens because of Saturn's dominance.

Almost all students in my class went for private tuition. My family couldn't afford it. I didn't have the privilege to do so. But then the miracles started to happen.

Miracles of extreme self-confidence

That year, I scored 99% in mathematics. Also came in the top three for many other subjects. For the first time in my life, I'm one of the top 10 performers in my class. I was the sixth. I changed how others see me as a person.

I didn't expect this. Mostly when Saturn was in a bad mood in my horoscope. I walked with pride to receive the report that says "Commanded Report." It was an unexplainable feeling I had that day.

I walked back to the class alone after receiving the commanded report. I had no friends to celebrate. But when I entered the classroom, the rich girls who laughed at me came to me. They said, "you won, you achieved because of your hard work. We finally understood why you were studying so hard." I was able to make friends with them.

No matter where the planet moves and affects you, keep trying, be smart, be vigilant, and never give up on your goal.

This wasn't a story about running behind ranks or grades. I wrote about this before. It's about how I come to understand the power of hard work. And the power of extreme self-confidence.

Try hard, try smart; your effort will never fail. Mine didn't.

Thank you for reading!

This article was originally published in the medium