A Bag of Lettuce

Some days you just reach a breaking point. This was one of those days. Work issues, traffic was insane, people were rude. It was just snowballing as the day progressed. Eventually I found myself in the parking lot of my local grocery store with some woman driving a giant van that could not decide where she was going and would not communicate it with simple hand gestures. As I gestured left or right? She just waved her hand.

So I did what any person that had finally reached the end of their rope on a long, hot frustrating day. I stopped in the middle of the parking lot, pounded on the steering wheel and shook my head. When I stopped and looked up, the lady in the van just waved at me to move out of her way. Thanks for the concern.

So I parked my car, got out and decided I needed to release this stress before I headed in to pick up the few items on my list. So, I locked my vehicle, turned around and screamed at the top of my lungs. And nothing happened. As in nothing. One girl looked at me. I explained it had to be done for stress release and she nodded and walked on. But no one else even looked.

A woman screaming in a parking lot and no one looked. Forget about coming over or asking me how I was. Nope, just completely ignored me. First there was the knowledge that if I ever am in true distress, none of these people would lift a finger or even acknowledge my trouble so basically, I am on my own if a meteor is hurtling towards my head. Second thing to cross my mind is that we have become so isolated in our own little worlds that we don’t even notice each other.

I decided to truly test this theory. So I went into the grocery store, proceeded to the produce section (after stopping in the floral department to admire flowers and relax a little more), grabbed the bag of lettuce out of the refrigerated section and placed it upon my head.

Now bagged lettuce is surprisingly supple and will mold to whatever you lay it on, including your own cranium. It balances nicely. So with my bag of iceberg, cabbage and carrots making a the better fashion statement than any tiara or bonnet, I continued about the store collecting my other items.

And no one noticed. I think I got a glance from one man but he didn’t even break his conversations so I cannot be sure. Others were too busy staring at their phones or the ground or the food. We have become such a society of isolated individuals. Don’t look, don’t touch, don’t talk, don’t be involved in anything outside of your own existence.

Finally, a woman a little older than myself looked and smiled. I smiled back and thanked her. I explained about the scream without hope of rescue. I told her she was the first to actually look at me. We laughed, felt sad (and a little scared as women) and parted a little better.

I have done other things in this same grocery store. One day I tried to make eye contact with people. That proved nearly impossible. Another time I walked through the store with a smile on my face. I think some people thought I should be committed for that atrocity. I just shake my head.

Your neighborhood grocery store is made of just that, your neighborhood. These are the people who live near you, who share the same lifestyle and experiences yet they feel no connection to each other. I wonder if they feel any connection to themselves.

I will continue to look like the crazy lady in the store because I am friendly, happy and have a sense of humor. I am not rushing to get back into traffic or angry because I have money to buy food and a safe place to eat it. I am not going to lose hope.

So, if you see someone with a bag of lettuce on their head next time you are getting your groceries, at least smile. You don’t even have to break your stride as you head quickly in the opposite direction. But that smile may make a world of difference to them, and possibly even you.