8 Signs You Are a Mentally Strong Person

Experts now believe that there’s only one definitive way to success and that is mental strength. Call it grit, willpower, fortitude, determination, or sheer insistence. Many great leaders, entrepreneurs, athletes, actors, inventors, philosophers, psychologists, and other high-achievers have also praised the power of mental strength and said it to be the most powerful key to their success.

Now, if you are wondering whether or not you are mentally strong, here are the top 8 signs of a mentally strong person. If these traits sound familiar to you, then you are one of them!

1. You Don’t Try to Make Everyone Happy

Most people are afraid of disappointing others whether it be their friends, relatives, family members, neighbors, colleagues, bosses, especially when they think others may turn against them. They compromise their valuable time, comfort, or even money to spare another person’s feelings.

They will often agree to do something they don’t like or feel comfortable doing just to keep someone’s mind or in a fear that others might become hostile to them. On the other hand, being a mentally tough person, you aren’t a people pleaser. You respect your own time and feelings. You know that you can’t make everyone happy.

There are too many people with too many different demands and expectations that it makes no sense to you even to try to do so. You are like Marlee Matlin (American actress) who once said —

“I have made the choices that work best for me. I know I cannot please everyone, and that’s fine”

You think other people’s emotions are not always your responsibility. You feel confident and comfortable standing up for yourself and don’t feel guilty or afraid every time you say “no” to others' proposals. You always do what you think is best for you not what others tell you to do.

However, you’re direct but pleasant and always treat everyone with respect and fairness. You don’t hate their opinions or proposals and show a tolerant attitude towards them. You just won’t agree with someone or let them dictate your actions just to keep their mind when your inner voice is screaming “no”.

2. You Enjoy Spending Time Alone

For some people, time spent alone is dreadful because it invites loneliness, insecurity, and other obsessive thoughts which can manifest as a phobia called autophobia. For those individuals Rollo May (American psychologist) counseled—

“In order to be open to creativity, one must have the capacity for constructive use of solitude. One must overcome the fear of being alone”

And, you have overcome the fear of being alone. In a world linked together 24/7 by social media, you sometimes like to disconnect yourself from the crowd. For you, time spent alone is time to relax, rewire and reflect on what is happening in your life and know yourself better.

You spend this time improving yourself whether by reading books, doing creative activities, pursuing your hobbies. However, it’s different from introversion, as mentally strong people don’t necessarily need to be alone. It’s just something they enjoy when it happens.

3. You Don’t Strive to Make Things Perfect

Some people strive and spend a great deal of time just to get something done right. Whether it is an essay, business project, thesis paper, an important form to fill, they become obsessed with making sure it’s 100 percent perfect and flawless as a consequence of constantly being pushed by a greater fear of failure or rejection. 

According to Verywellmind.com, Sometimes they will worry so much about doing something imperfectly that they become immobilized and fail to do anything at all. In psychology, this is called perfectionism, and the person concerned is called a perfectionist. But, being a mentally tough person, you are not a perfectionist. You think that perfectionism is detrimental to productivity and nothing is 100 percent perfect anyway.

Instead, you are a rightist like James Cameron (Canadian film director) who once said —

“People call me a perfectionist, but I’m not. I’m a rightist. I do something until it’s right, and then I move on to the next thing”

You have a healthy view of failure and fearlessly try to make things right instead of worrying about doing something imperfectly. You think even if you fail or get rejected, you can learn from your mistakes and do better in the future. You embrace failure and criticism viewing them as lessons rather than indications of what is your ability as a person.

4. You Don’t Dwell on Regrets

Some people find themselves ruminating on their mistakes in the past, hold on to regrets that make them traumatized and miserable. At a point in time, it becomes so obsessive that they no longer can think of other things and find them immobilized in life. But as a mentally strong person, you know that holding on to regrets or dwelling on past mistakes gives you nothing but sheer pain. You don’t rehash things you have no control over, like old failures or arguments.

Instead, you remember what L. Ron Hubbard (American author) said —

“Never regret yesterday. Life is in you today and you make your tomorrow”

You focus on the present and take the necessary actions in order to make your future better. If something you can change you will. But you let go of what you cannot change and throw them away before your thinking grasp on you. However, being remorseful is a good thing. Thinking about the past in a productive way can help you spot your mistakes, and grow you into your better self by learning from them. But when that thinking turns into rumination or indefensible guilt, it becomes toxic.

5. You Don’t Scare to Make Changes in Your Life

Russian novelist Fyodor Dostoevsky once said —

“Taking a new step, uttering a new word, is what people fear most”

Fear of change is one of the most common fears that people face in their life which can manifest as a phobia psychologists often call Metathesiophobia. For example, they choose to stay in a toxic relationship because they are scared of the consequence of the breakup like being single or having to go on dates to find a new partner. Another example is they continue jobs that make them miserable because they are scared to start a new job.

But few people don’t feel somewhat anxious even about the major upheavals in their lives and you are one of those few people. As a mentally tough person, you are always flexible in all of your life situations. No matter what comes in you are constantly adapting yourself for the better.

You know the fear of change is paralyzing and detrimental to success. You think change is a part of life and you have to change for good in order to make yourself better and get the most out of your life. You dare to push yourself outside of your comfort zone and enjoy facing new challenges that will help you in the long run.

6. You Don’t Lose Patience Easily

As a mentally strong person, you know that success doesn’t come overnight. Truly good things need constant effort for prolonged periods. You think that it’s totally okay to sometimes have setbacks in life. Things don’t always happen according to expectation. So, in tough situations, you don’t give up, you neither break down emotionally nor burst out with anger.

Instead, you remember the famous saying of Winston Churchill (Former Prime Minister of the United Kingdom) —

“If you’re going through hell, keep going”

So, whether it’s a financial crisis or a personal health problem, you push yourself through the hardships and patiently await positive results. You continuously take tiny steps, track your progress and do your best to get out of the painful situation.

7. You Are Open to Constructive Criticism

Criticism, even if it is a constructive one, can sometimes stink. But, at the same time, constructive criticism is often extremely valuable and deserves your attention which enables you to spot your mistakes and improve yourself for the better.

That’s why Winston Churchill (Former Prime Minister of the United Kingdom) once said —

“Criticism may not be agreeable, but it is necessary. It fulfills the same function as pain in the human body. It calls attention to the development of an unhealthy state of things”

As a mentally tough person, you understand this. You appreciate other people’s feedback and tips and take it as a suggestion rather than a reproval. Then, you reevaluate your ideas and belief based on newly acquired insights and perspectives. If their points seem valid and relevant to you, you not only accept their idea but embrace it and use it as a tool to fuel your growth.

8. You Don’t Rely on Others

While it’s good to know that there are always some people in your life to help you out, constantly relying on others makes you internally weaker and stops you to go far in life. 

Michael Bassey Johnson ( Author of Infinity Sign) once said —

“If you truly want to be respected by people you love, you must prove to them that you can survive without them.”

As a mentally strong person, you know this like the back of your hand. You have a strong sense of self and you practice self-sufficiency. Rather than asking others for help, you learn how to deal with your own problems alone. You figure out why something went wrong and try to come up with the right solution to the problem. You allow others to support you, not to rescue you.

Final Thoughts

Done? If you were being honest above, you know whether or not you are a mentally strong person. If yes, congratulations! But, if the answer is "no", don’t be upset either. Mental strength isn’t something you are born with. It’s a choice, an attitude, and a lifestyle. 

Anyone can build it from scratch at any stage in their life by adopting the same habits of mentally strong people. It’s a quality that can be learned and whetted through resolution, practice, discipline, and hard work. So, upgrade your mindset to shagger off your mental weakness, and start practicing the habits that you already have learned above. Hope you will be able to make your mental muscle stronger and make it your superpower to transform your ordinary life into an extraordinary one.

Finally,

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8 Signs You Are a Mentally Strong Person originally appeared on Medium