Motivation logo

10 Signs You're Being Jealous And How To Deal With It

When you’re very close with someone, it’s all too easy to fall into the trap of jealousy.

By Lap Cong Thach Published 4 years ago 5 min read
10 Signs You're Being Jealous And How To Deal With It
Photo by Obie Fernandez on Unsplash

Jealousy is a natural emotion that most people experience at some point in their lives. Some periods may be better for jealousy than others, but it's typically an inevitable feeling that comes and goes without any sort of warning. It can be paralyzing to feel this way towards someone you care about, but what if you're being consumed by these feelings? You might not even know it yet, so here are some tell-tale signs that you're being jealous and how to deal with them.

1. You Keep Them On A String

Leaving this person on a literal string isn't the best idea, but if you're keeping them from moving on with other people in their life, then you're limiting your relationship in one way or another.

It's good to be protective of your partner, but if that means constantly wanting to hold them back from other potential relationships, then this is a form of jealousy that could actually be harmful. Letting them move on means letting go and moving into your own life as well, so don't be too attached to it.

2. You're Always Checking Their Phone

If you're constantly sneaking into their phone to see what they're doing or who they have been talking to, then this could be a sign of jealousy. It's okay not to trust them and it's okay to question their actions, but the line is crossed when the feeling of jealousy takes over your life.

They have a right to privacy and you shouldn't feel entitled about getting into their phone for any reason. If you feel like you need some answers, try sitting down with them first to discuss your concerns or possibly even looking into a professional counselor or therapist before taking drastic measures.

3. You're A Jealous Person

If you can't stop checking their phone or you're always looking over their shoulder when they go out, then this could be a sign of jealousy. It's important to understand if it's really something that is just happening at the moment or if it's something that you usually do.

If this is something you always do and it makes you feel uneasy when they don't follow your orders, then it might be time to come to terms with the fact that you have a serious problem with jealousy.

We all need some space in our relationships and if you wish to have any sort of healthy relationship with them, then try being okay with them moving on and having a social life outside of yours.

4. You Won't Let Them Talk To A Potential Love Interest

If you're having issues letting them go out with someone else because you feel jealous of what they could be doing or who they could be communicating with, then this could be a common side effect of jealousy. Like I said before, a healthy relationship means trusting the person for themselves and their actions.

When you're too attached to your partner, it's as if you want to control them and make sure that nothing bad happens to them ever. If this is the case, take some deep breaths when these feelings come on and ask yourself if there's something more going on than what you think is happening.

5. You Are Obsessed With Them

If you feel like you're constantly thinking about them or checking their whereabouts to make sure they're still around, then this could be a sign of jealousy that's getting the best of you. You have the right to love who you want to love and care for who you want to care for, but if a part of you is always worrying about them, then this isn't healthy at all. If it gets in the way of your relationship with them, start making some changes to your life so that these unproductive thoughts don't get in the way of either one of your daily lives.

6. You Question Their Every Move

If you find yourself second-guessing their intentions or even wondering what they're doing at all times, then this could definitely be a sign of jealousy. If you're questioning every move that they make and you're constantly worrying about them for no reason, then this is something that has to change.

It's not a healthy way to live your life and it limits your relationship with them. You can never be sure of someone else's intentions, so if you have been questioning them too much and you don't think it's healthy anymore, talk to them about it.

7. You're Secretly Following Them Around

If you can't stop yourself from following them out of your sight in order to make sure that they're okay, then you definitely have something going on with jealousy. Your partner can't keep a secret from you, so why does it feel like they are keeping one from you?

If this is the case, then this behavior is not only unhealthy for your relationship, but it's also an invasion of their privacy. If this sort of behavior continues and gets in the way of your relationship with them and your day-to-day lives, take a look at yourself and try to figure out what is really going on.

8. You're Alarmed By The Way They Treat Others

If you have any unspoken judgments or concerns about the way they treat others, then this could be a sign of jealousy. This is something that is better left unsaid and if you have any doubts about their behavior, then it's best to bring it up to them and talk about what's bothering you with them.

If you're constantly having these kinds of thoughts, then there could be something going on that needs your attention and knowing what it is could help solve the problem.

It could be an honest concern or simply a case of being overprotective. Either way, try talking to them about what's going on in their mind so that they can feel better.

9. You're Jealous Of Their Friends

This is something that most people don't question when it comes to jealousy, but we tend to be jealous of our partner's friends more often than not. If you have some issues with the way you feel about them, then why not take the time to talk about it with your significant other so that they can understand?

If you're constantly annoyed by their friends or if you don't like them for some reason, then this is a huge red flag that needs to be brought up verbally. Keeping it inside will only make things worse and if it continues, then there could be some major problems that arise from your jealousy.

10. You Feel Like It's Okay To Hurt Them

No matter what you may think about yourself, you should never feel like it's okay to hurt your partner. Having these thoughts means that something is really wrong in your life and you need to work on it sooner rather than later. Whether it's verbal or physical abuse, these sort of thoughts are very unhealthy and if they keep coming to mind, then try talking to a professional counselor or therapist so that they can guide you in the right direction.

If any of these signs apply to you and your relationship, don't beat yourself up over it. Instead, take a moment to focus on what you can do to heal yourself. Remember that these are all symptoms of a failing relationship and if this is something that is constantly coming to mind, then something needs to change.

success

About the Creator

Lap Cong Thach

I am a writer for one reasons. It’s what I’m meant to do with my life: create worlds, characters who breathe and live off the page with me.

Reader insights

Be the first to share your insights about this piece.

How does it work?

Add your insights

Comments

There are no comments for this story

Be the first to respond and start the conversation.

Sign in to comment

    Find us on social media

    Miscellaneous links

    • Explore
    • Contact
    • Privacy Policy
    • Terms of Use
    • Support

    © 2026 Creatd, Inc. All Rights Reserved.