Going to the Chapel: How to Have a (Nearly) Stress-Free Wedding and Honeymoon

The caterer needs to know how many people are coming, and if there are any allergies they should be aware of. The DJ needs a list of songs for first dances, wedding party dances, and special moments within your ceremony. The hotel you’re staying in during your honeymoon has called and said there’s a problem with one of your excursions. There are 18 million other things you need to get done before the most important day of your life. Everything is piling up, and you’re not sure where to begin to get it all done. There must be a better, more straight-forward way to do this.

The Venue

Besides making sure you have a budget figured out with everyone that’s contributing ahead of time, the best way to take the stress out of a wedding is to find a wedding venue that has most of what you’ll need already under one roof. This may sound like a Herculean task, but the research, time, and effort you’ll put into finding a venue that has their act together will pay off in the long run. Instead of having to wrangle multiple vendors in the weeks leading up to your wedding, see what the venue already provides first, and then look for individual vendors to provide the leftover services after. Catering can be one of the most expensive parts of a wedding, but if you can get it included within a packaged deal, there can be ways to bring the costs down. This also applies to the bar. Ask the event manager if there is a buy-back plan to get any extra wine or beer you’ve already paid for, and went unused at the end of the night, or if you can get a refund on it.

Do they have an in-house band or DJ? The lack of transportation costs can help to bring down your bill, as well as mitigate any worries about technical failings or tardiness. The same goes for a wedding planner. If they employ someone who actually specializes in weddings, and fully understands all aspects of what goes into an event of this importance at the venue, that can alleviate a lot of unnecessary stress from a bride and groom. The day is meant for you two to share your love and focus on your future; it’s not to be spent trying to give directions to the band, or find an outlet for the photographer to plug in their back-up batteries.

The Honeymoon

There are some things that are out of our hands when we travel. Unless you own a private jet there’s no way to avoid flight delays. Noisy neighbors at hotels are less than ideal, and sometimes there’s not another room in which to retreat. But some inconveniences can be planned around, if given enough attention before you even begin packing.

One of worst feelings is to plan an excursion and feel you’re not getting your money’s worth. This may be because the organizers are behind schedule and you’re rushed. It may be because there are so many people in the group you don’t feel that you’re getting enough personalized attention to do the activity. While it may cost a little more, private excursions can be a great way to really enjoy your honeymoon, and the time with your new spouse. Set up a cooking lesson with a chef at the resort to really take the time to figure out the dish; ask for custom surfing lessons with a professional who can give you tips on your form and make you feel safer by focusing on just the two of you in the water instead of an entire class. Whatever the hobby may be, a relaxed environment without extra distraction from others will leave you feeling satisfied.

Large or small, all weddings come with some stress. But if you remember that it’s actually a celebration of the life you’re about to embark on together, and not about how many people can imbibe on custom created cocktails in your honor, or having the most Instagram-worthy photos from the reception and honeymoon, this once-in-a-lifetime event can be something you look back on with only fond memories. For a lifetime.