humanity

Advocates, icons, influencers, and more. All about humanity.

Born Crips/Made Crips
So, in my beginning life...Again post, I mentioned the term born crip when referring to my wife, Joey. I'd be considered a born crip, because I've been in a wheelchair all my life from Spina Bifida with Cerebral Palsy in my hands. Joey has Cerebral Palsy, and is also in a wheelchair, but she can get out easier than I can.
By Jason Rhode8 years ago in Longevity
What If...
So, every now and then, Joey and I talk about "what if" we could walk, “what if” our hands worked better. This isn't a feeling sorry for ourselves convo. Yeah, growing up, we wanted to walk, and, in reality, neither one of us saw ourselves with a crip, because we know the baggage we already bring to the table... Why double it?
By Jason Rhode8 years ago in Longevity
Life From Two Feet Below
So, my name's Jason Rhode. I'm a 40-year-old crip (I'll get to the crip term later). I live in Midland, Texas with my wife, who I’ll be writing a lot about and who’s also a crip with a different disability than my own. We have two fur babies, Hollywood, a Shih Tzu, and Chewy, a Lhaso Apso.
By Jason Rhode8 years ago in Longevity
Everything Happens for a Reason
Currently, it is 12:56 AM. I have work at 6 AM, but of course that never stops me from going to bed a lot later than I should be. I'd like to blame my phone for keeping me up.. but in reality it's actually me who's to blame. But I wonder if there's a deeper reason as to why I am still awake. You see, I was scrolling through Instagram when I came across an AD for this website. The first thing I saw were the words "Submit your stories. Get paid." Which initially caught my attention, because honestly, getting paid to write? Who wouldn't be interested in that. But... I also found it to be rather ironic. Recently I have been contemplating a lot about writing to let my feelings out or maybe starting a blog. That could also be due to the fact that I have been binge watching "Awkward" on MTV and the main character has a blog and religiously writes what she's going through. Anyway, I can't help but to think about wether or not coming across that AD at the time I did was meant to happen or just a random coincidence. Today has been prolonged, it feels never ending. From the moment I woke up, I've been filled with anxiety. All day I've been trying to figure out how to calm down, and how to distract myself. Nothing has helped, not even a friends company, which usually is always the cure for when I'm feeling down or out of it. Then.. as I'm trying to relax I see an AD for this? I've written before to calm nerves but that was kind of a one time thing.. not something I followed through with, and to be completely honest I forgot how much it helps. I'm going through a weird time in my life. A strange transition period. It's time to grow up, and figure out who I'm meant to be and who's meant to be in my life. I often find myself overthinking, and feeling too many things at once; not having an outlet to let everything out. What's even more ironic is money is super important right now. I have to drop out of school due to "insufficient funds". I'm trying to support myself on my own, and it's honestly super hard. I don't even have a car which is now my first priority to save up money for. I suppose I should have thought about this whole process first, rather than jumping right into school. Looking back on it, I think that was more of pressured decision. I didn't want to be judged by others or looked down upon for "not going to college". But something I am realizing is that I need to make decisions based on me, no one else. In the end, I am all I have. So, as you can imagine my mind is constantly racing with what decisions are best for me and how to be sure I won't regret anything.. but that must be part of the process of growing as well. I mean, you do learn from your mistakes. Just recently, I broke up with someone who always knew how to calm me down when I felt like this. Truth be told, it's for the better (for both of us), but now that he's not there for me like that I have to find another way to relax. Writing helps a lot actually. I'm a strong believer in the idea that everything happens for a reason. I was certainly meant to come across this website. The universe is listening to me and my worries. I don't know what the future holds, but I'm ready to blindly trust it.
By Alexandra Lunetta8 years ago in Longevity
Competitive Pain
Pain. Whether it’s emotional, mental or physical, pain has the ability to take over our entire existence. As one of the millions of people who suffer from chronic pain and a slew of other health issues I can tell you this: pain should never be a competition. It should be validated for the individual. But this is not the case. I’ve spent so much time reading comments on my social media from people who also struggle with their own health issues and pain. Instead of feeling validated from the pain I’ve expressed in a post, I am flooded with people talking about their own pain and how their own illnesses affect them. Suddenly my words are used to build others' cases and it becomes an unintentional competition. Just because we have different ailments doesn’t mean our pain is that much different — and no one will ever truly know or understand the pain one suffers. All you can do is validate it by saying, “I’m so sorry you are experiencing this. I am thinking of you.” In that comment I am not taking away from the pain the individual expressed and I’m not competing by stating all of my own pain issues that end up making the person feel unheard and frustrated. It isn’t a competition! I don’t need to hear all about your constant pains and ailments when I am already attempting to handle my own heaviness. When someone starts listing all the pain and things they can’t to as a response to a post I become frustrated. The point of my post was never to feel like my pain is "nothing compared to what others feel," but that’s what happens. I understand people think if they relate to others by listing everything they suffer with themselves as a way to try to make me or others “not feel alone,” but it does exactly the opposite. It makes me feel like I will never be sick enough for the appropriate validation. It makes me feel like their pain is more important than my own. It makes me feel like they don’t understand despite how they say they do, because they are so wrapped up in their own type of pain. But pain is subjective. It manifests in too many ways to know the exact form of it. To me, pain is pain. And I will always validate it when someone expresses it to me by never bringing my own issues up. I simply accept their pain and offer comforting words. There’s no need for me to go into depth about all the pain I am currently enduring because that person can only handle their own pain in the moment and it’s not fair of me to put it onto them. I never want to make people feel like they haven’t been heard. That’s one of the worst feelings, and it happens way too often in this life full of chronic illness and chronic pain. We are often overlooked in the medical field, and doctors can treat us with such disrespect it’s appalling. Of course, these are my personal experiences, but I know I’m not alone.
By Lauren Berichon8 years ago in Longevity
Millennial with Invisible Illness
When you turn 21, your expectation is to get your "adult ID" and go to clubs and bars with your friends, drink on a Thursday even if you have to wake up at 5 AM the next day for work. Unfortunately, my reality, my 21st birthday, I was always exhausted, I fell asleep almost everywhere, my only dates were with doctors and the only mood modifying substance was the cocktail of 21 pills I was taking daily.
By Yessenia Ivone8 years ago in Longevity
To Love With Death
Recently, I completed a course to be a Death Doula. What that means is that I can sit with dying people in hospice, or at home. I can work with families, while they are preparing for the death of a loved one, in whatever capacity we agree upon. You might wonder why someone would want to be in contact with death as a job, or as a volunteer? Or why someone would want to put themselves next to people who are dying? Or inside homes with families mourning and saddened with grief? I am not entirely sure why, really. My father was 60 when I was born so, I basically lived everyday thinking he might die. Most phone calls after ten took me a couple of seconds to prepare for 'that' call. I actually never got 'that' call. The hospital called me in time to allow me to get there to sit with him for about three hours before he died. It was during that experience I decided I would like to be able to sit with dying people because nobody should die alone.
By Carol Jax8 years ago in Longevity
Surviving Surviving
No one taught me how to be handicapped. How am I supposed to be something I was never taught to see? When I was a girl eating bologna sandwiches and watching the history channel instead of cartoons on Saturday mornings with my father, he told me I could be and do anything — well, except be a surgeon or fly a plane, as if those could ever be my only two limitations. I was raised to be and feel normal and think my handicap was just part of normal life, that there was no difference between me and someone who is not visually impaired. And that is one hell of a way to be. It really is. But my desire to be normal drove me to being embarrassed and even ashamed of my handicap to the point I would go to great lengths to hide it. The last thing you would ever hear me say was “I can’t see it.” No one showed me how to own it. No one understood the pain, anger, trauma, and isolation I feel about it. No one gets what it was like being a survivor. And survivor is such a bullshit term too for someone who still feels like a victim.
By Queen James8 years ago in Longevity
Disabily: Disabled or Differently Abled
Handicapped, disabled, special, and the dreaded "r" word. Those are all terms that are often synonymous with people who have different needs. The world has been changing so much in the last few decades and the LGBTQ community has been becoming more accepted and pride has blossomed. Awesome!
By Rachel Bonyai8 years ago in Longevity
Do Autistics Really Have No Empathy?
Since I started researching my symptoms I've come across article after article stating that autistic people cannot feel empathy. One thing I've noticed is that all of these articles are written by people who do not have autism. Knowing that I have a great deal of empathy, I started asking other autistic people what their experience with empathy is. The overwhelming response has been that autism actually increases empathy to a point far greater than the empathy experienced by your average individual. The problem is that the brains of people without autism do not function in this way so it is impossible for them to understand fully. Communication issues also make it difficult for autistic people to explain the experience fully. I will try my best to explain how empathy affects me and hopefully this will help others to understand better.
By Aspie Insider8 years ago in Longevity
Invisible Illnesses
96% of people living with chronic conditions have invisible illnesses and chances are you know at least one of them, but do you know exactly what their struggles are? Have you ever wanted to know more about their situation but don't know how to approach them? Here is a list I have compiled of things that many of us living with an invisible illness want you to know.
By Leslie Montaño8 years ago in Longevity
How the Opioid Epidemic Effects People with Chronic Illness
I was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis in May of 2017. Yes it is still new, I know I have not had it as long as others have. That does not make my pain any less real. I feel pain consistently every single day. It is very unfortunate that I have to consider this “my new normal.”
By Natalie Chatman8 years ago in Longevity