Conversation's In The BWCA

When talking about her sister-in-law and how difficult it has been for her children to get her up and moving after surgery, I found myself sticking up for the one that just had surgery.

I said, "Do you remember how long it took you to get rolling again after your knee surgery? I remember how difficult it was to move after surgery. I think it took far too long until I felt good enough to do what I was used to doing most days."

"And I remember you trying to go off your pain meds too soon into physical therapy. I didn't want to do laundry, do dishes, or make my bed. That is what I remember happening after surgery. I didn't have anyone pushing me out the door. Did you?"

"Then her surgery was having both of her breasts removed. Depression will slow you down. Is she getting newly reconstructed breasts?" "No, she decided she is too old for that." said my sister-friend. "I would guess she may need counseling then," I said.

So many people think they know what is best for you.

I am tired and old and have lived through so much. I have diabetes, a mitral valve prolapse that has been fixed twice, and a type of cancer that is treatable, probably not curable. There is a spot on my lung from chemotherapy that is watched yearly.

I have super ventricular tachycardia, atrial fibrillation, and spots on my stomach that they are not sure what it is. They recommend I cut down on the gluten as I was asked to do a fodmap and wasn't allergic to gluten. I have lots of allergies. And I get side effects from most medications.

It is not everything but it feels like it is too much.

Having said all of that, I have had a full life. Yes. My children now have grown children which means not only grandchildren but great grand-children. All of our children graduated from high school and had opportunities for college.

They are successful adults. I have a stepdaughter that is fully in her addiction. The only one out of seven. We would love to see her well for her sake and her children's. My husband and I talked about how having 7 children could mean that someone dies before us.

My sister and I talked about our children at length. Her children and grandchildren are also doing well. We talked about a will. My husband's funeral is paid for. We have a fund for mine. My sister-friends husband died from covid a few years ago now.

We talked about the difficulties when facing both his death through a window and the aftermath.

Enough about that. I have a small bucket list but I have really done most everything I wanted to do in my lifetime and more. Now, it is things like let's get out of MN for a month in the middle of winter. We had a long winter last year.

My husband is living his dream life. He wants to do what he's doing since retirement until he can't do it anymore. We talked about her plans for retirement and I shared more about mine and my husbands.

The husband and I are both active in our retirement. Both with long-term recovery. No alcohol, no drugs for 42 years or since I was 26. I have been in recovery since I was 24. I gave up smoking cigarettes and smoking marijuana then. No alcohol at 26, and no amphetamines.

I truly believe I would have died a long time ago, like my first husband died from his addiction, if not for recovery.

We went into town from the BWCA and we spoke to a woman in recovery that has brain cancer. At first, we thought she wasn't very friendly, and then she told us about her cancer. She was given three months to 3 years to live just before getting to the meeting.

She had an online visit with an oncologist from the University of Minnesota.

I found myself getting upset. I told her about a cancer lady in Blackduck. The oncologist told her no one survives her type of cancer. That was true for lung cancer once too and now they have Keytruda.

She cried when telling us, but not much. I heard a woman say on stage that laughter and tears are our best medicine and can keep cancer away. In my Ojibwe culture, our first two medicines are tears and laughter.

I believed Dr. Annette Goodheart and our cultural teachings saying that laughter and tears are our best medicine. Medicine that is important to use daily if you can.

I laugh alot with my husband and certain others. If I need to laugh I know who to call or where to go for a good laugh. Laughter and tears make for a better day!

My sister-friend and I had way too many serious conversations and still we laughed. I scared her as I closed my window in the evening. I said that a bear could easily come through that window. When we were up in the woods camping our food was in a tree. Here it is in the cabin.

She thought that was so funny after all the bear we shooed out of our camp over the years. Then she was watching for a moose and I said, no moose is going to hang out with all the people here now. Last time you were here there was probably no one here right?

I was right and we laughed. Taking the steps up and going down the ramp at the restaurant was funny. All the old people things that we ran into were funny. Well, most of them anyway.

Our conversations in the BWCA felt important and necessary, even though it is probably not something very interesting for most readers. Sorry!