3 Thinking Patterns That Held Me Back for Years

For years, I thought something outside of me was holding me back.

I blamed circumstances. Timing. Other people. I told myself I just needed more confidence, more discipline, or the right opportunity. But deep down, nothing ever truly moved forward—and I couldn’t understand why.

It wasn’t until I slowed down and listened to my own thoughts that I realized the truth:

I wasn’t stuck because I lacked ability.

I was stuck because of how I was thinking.

These three thinking patterns lived quietly in my mind for years. They didn’t scream or announce themselves. They simply shaped my decisions, my hesitation, and my self-doubt—until I finally learned to see them clearly.

1. “I’ll Start When I Feel Ready”

This thought felt reasonable. Responsible, even.

I believed that one day I would feel confident enough, prepared enough, and motivated enough to begin. So I waited. I planned. I researched. I imagined.

But I didn’t start.

Readiness became a comfortable excuse. It protected me from failure, embarrassment, and discomfort—but it also protected me from growth.

What I learned the hard way is that readiness doesn’t arrive before action. It arrives because of action. Confidence grows after you try, not before.

Once I stopped waiting to feel ready and started acting imperfectly, progress finally began.

2. “If I Can’t Do It Perfectly, It’s Not Worth Doing”

This mindset controlled more of my life than I realized.

I avoided starting projects unless I knew I could do them well. I delayed sharing ideas until they felt flawless. And when things didn’t go exactly as planned, I often quit altogether.

Perfection felt like high standards—but it was actually fear wearing a neat disguise.

Fear of judgment.

Fear of mistakes.

Fear of not being enough.

Letting go of perfection didn’t lower my quality—it raised my consistency. I learned that growth comes from repetition, not perfection.

Progress became possible the moment I allowed myself to be imperfect.

3. “Other People Are Already Better Than Me”

Comparison quietly drained my confidence.

Every time I saw someone doing well, I used it as proof that I was behind. Instead of learning from others, I measured myself against them—and always came up short.

This thinking made me smaller. Quieter. More hesitant.

What I didn’t realize then is that comparison steals focus. It shifts attention away from your own journey and replaces it with unnecessary doubt.

When I stopped competing and started creating, my energy returned. I focused on improvement instead of validation.

There is room for more than one person to succeed.

How These Patterns Changed My Life

These thoughts didn’t just affect my goals. They affected my self-trust.

They made me question my timing, my ability, and my worth. They kept me in planning mode instead of action mode. They convinced me that waiting was safer than trying.

But awareness changed everything.

Once I noticed these patterns, I could challenge them. I didn’t eliminate them overnight—but I stopped letting them control my choices.

And slowly, life started to move again.

What I Think Differently Now

I no longer wait for readiness—I create it through action.

I value progress over perfection.

I use comparison as inspiration, not judgment.

Most importantly, I remind myself that thoughts are powerful—but they are not always true.

The way you think shapes the way you live.

A Final Reflection

If you feel stuck, don’t only look at your habits.

Look at your thinking.

Sometimes what holds us back isn’t lack of talent or opportunity—but quiet beliefs we’ve never questioned.

Change the thought.

Change the direction.

Change the life.

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Thank you for reading...

Regards: Fazal Hadi