Holding fire hurts both body and mind

Anger is a normal emotion. When angry, do you let it out right away, or do you force it back in? Many people dare not speak out of anger in order to be friendly. Anger isn't a bad thing. It's a signal that hides our need to be "understood and seen" and "don't overstep our bounds" and "don't push us down." If you have been depressed, it is not a small blow to the body and mind.

Impair immunity and increase the risk of disease. A study by Harvard University in the US found that simply thinking about an angry experience can suppress immune system function for up to six hours. If you are angry all the time, the immune system's resistance to bacteria and viruses will continue to decline, and people will get sick easily. So instead of going away, pent-up anger turns into negative energy that eats away at the body.

Easy to cause emotional problems, damage interpersonal relationships. Suppressing anger means being wronged and causes us to dwell on it, analyze it, and wonder if we or someone else did "right." Instead of resolving anger, this "overthinking" allows feelings of grievance, disappointment, and even depression and anxiety to accumulate into emotional problems. In line with the idea of "harmony is precious" do not vent anger, in the short term may get a calm, but the backlog of grievances can not hold back when the outbreak, will cause greater harm to the relationship, leading to the outcome and the original intention of the opposite, more than worth the loss.

Learning to control anger is a sign of maturity, but control doesn't mean repressing it. Enhance personal quality, not easily angry is the best, but really meet anger, how to deal with better?

When anger comes, try to get out of the situation. It's often difficult to control our anger when it rises up in the first place, but if we let it go right away, we can easily say or do the wrong thing, which can lead to unnecessary or even irreversible negative consequences. So, if you feel your anger bubbling up, take the opportunity to go to the bathroom, pretend to answer a phone call, or get some tea. When you get out, take a few deep breaths and wash your hands in cold water to relax and calm down. After you have calmed down, you can do an analysis and think about why you feel angry. What words, what things do each other stimulate us, what is the real psychological needs behind this? If necessary, record your thoughts. The advantage of doing this is that you stop dwelling on "I'm angry" or "I hate him" thoughts and start thinking about how to express and solve the problem.

Express anger promptly and subtly. Anger should not be suppressed for a long time, nor willfully vent, should be clear to the other side of the inner thoughts and needs, but at the same time should pay attention to empathy, do not make excessive requirements. When expressing, avoid a critical and accusatory tone, such as "You never do chores," which will only add tension to the conversation. "I feel a little angry because I wanted you to share the housework with me, but you left." This not only lets you vent your anger, but also expresses your feelings, and lets the other person know what you need. If your anger is manageable, you can also express it in a slightly humorous way, such as "I wash the dishes after dinner every day, I feel like a dishwasher", and express your thoughts lighthearted but not sarcastic. In addition, venting emotions is not the ultimate goal. It is better for both sides to think about solutions together during communication, such as taking turns washing dishes and so on, to solve the problem from the root.

Reduce stress and ask for help if necessary. Some anger is difficult to express and vent on the spot, usually accumulated anger and pressure, we need to clear regularly. One is to find the love of life, whether it is a hobby, some people, or a certain space. No matter what bad things happen, you can get healing power from it and digest the anger. The other is to do relaxation training, such as deep breathing, meditation, yoga, etc., to raise the threshold of anger. Third, try to put yourself in others' shoes. If you have difficulties, others are the same. Use a tolerant attitude towards people and things around you, and the tangle will be much less. If you try the above methods, but still can't control their anger, or easy to do things in anger to hurt yourself and others, it is recommended to seek help from a psychiatrist in time.