What If You Were Forced to Stop Living in a Fast-Paced Routine?

On September 1, a sudden power interruption occurred, lasting for nearly a few hours in our town. It’s quite funny because being a fresh graduate with so much time in the world, I was stressing about how to plan for what’s coming next. I’m sure to go out-of-country this year so I made it firm that I shouldn’t try applying for a job within our area if it’s certain that they won’t be seeing the newly hired for two months or so.

I planned to have a full-on plunge with refining the skills I left hanging during the course of finishing my degree and to watch more tutorials only to find out that we would suddenly lose electricity — hence, no internet.

I wasn’t mad about it, I should have been irritated because it’s a regular reaction to sudden stimuli knowing my tendencies but, I laughed it out; I felt like I had all the time in the world.

In another instance, I learned today (September 28, as of writing) that the said skills I recorded through written format on Google Docs after spending a vast amount of time sorting files and picking folders and accounts, had been trashed and in vain. I decluttered my digital data and I thought this was the right time to implement it since I’ve just graduated so all files must look presentable for the new period of life I have ahead. To my surprise, I tried opening a series of Word documents via Google Docs and Viola! — the file can’t be found. I jotted down all the endless notes and pieces of information and knowledge I stored in those documents. The time I spent to organize it according to my liking! It felt very unreal to me. I couldn’t retrieve the files back because I deleted even those that had to wait for a month before they got “Thanos-ed”. I was serious with the digital clutter, by the way, but of course, I didn’t expect all the time I spent making those notes to go to waste — like literally.

In a fit of annoyance, a brand new Reddit account emerged, all for sharing how frustrating that experience has been. Now fellas, make sure the documents can be converted properly by Google and get them working before deleting them & regretting it.

I must admit, when denial came in first, I comfortably thought, “Well, I can just learn that again!” It’s a magical sentence because it doesn’t pain me as much anymore; neither is it better to keep the feelings of regret lingering. After this kind of experience, I just don’t have plans yet of making a new batch of learned material — although the impulse is present. Indeed, I could just formulate another set of Google Docs, a version that could be much better than the previously loved notes to which I dedicated time and effort. But since it’s another task that has to be planned on my plate, I have to take a step back and observe other more important things. Then again, I don’t mind making another digital notebook and I guess there’s something beautiful about that.

Perhaps the biggest antis we have is ourselves. Being conditioned to act in a certain way, following a series of steps that others have established as “normal”. Similarly, I seem to think that I should do a certain thing before I move on to another task and so on, but if we’re talking about happiness, it’s the willingness to create more of what makes you feel alive; and those matter more than a routine that makes you feel stagnant.

If you were given a chance to start anew — a blank slate or the freedom to choose, what would you make?