humanity
The real lives of businessmen, professionals, the everyday man, stay at home parent, healthy lifestyle influencers, and general feel good human stories.
A Pointless Pursuit of Respect and Merit
What I love most about my college classes and professors is the merit my words have with them compared to my social, work, and personal life. I mean to say, at what point in my educational career will my words and advice actually have merit with people?
By Vanessa Marshall4 years ago in Journal
I Hope It’s Relatable
I very rarely share my adversity, but here I am. “Be still and know I am God” is what is ringing through my being as I type this out. I can know that it’s perfectly ok to share my struggle. I’ve restrained myself for so long from sharing my feelings/burdens because I know the power of the effects words can have on our lives. I’ve learned in countless therapy sessions to share what is going on within me that causes me great pain and turmoil. Honestly, I was so backed in a corner on the ability to express myself that I couldn’t be completely honest. Not even close to honest. I have been feeling so alone and so misunderstood for the past five years I’ve been in treatment. You’ve heard that right. Treatment. Substance Abuse Rehabilitation. I started going to rehab when I was 20. I’m now 25. The first time I went to rehab, they put me on a medicine 100mg over the max dose that was an antidepressant. I’m bipolar. Putting me on ANY antidepressant is a terrible idea, and incredibly insane from a doctors stand point. By the fourth week of being on that medicine, I was so psychotic I was sent to a hospital before I went to a psychward. During the first three months I was in a mixed Bipolar I state. This meant that I was having thoughts of a heaven perspective one minute and having thoughts of a hell perspective the next. This was for 3 months. The following next four years was me staying in rehabs trying to diffuse the psychotic beliefs and recover from drug addiction. Four years I was in a delusion state of mind that was worse than any sort of reality normal folks live in. Getting sober, not even possible. Every time I graduated a rehab, I quickly used within a week. Thus starting the trip from sober living back to rehab again. A miserable cycle of unsuccessful attempts and the pain of being ostracized for my thoughts and input to the groups I was participating in. Therapists referring to my as psychotic when overlooking their treatment plan when signing. Basically nobody having any faith in me. Family fed into the whole image of me being nothing more than the image of Bipolar I and medicine. To this day, I basically can only talk to my Dad about my meds and the feelings of trauma tear me apart from all the delusional thoughts I had those four years. To this day, I feel looked at as delusional, unaccepted, unloved, forsaken, left out in the cold, separated from others, and judged. Not to mention the amount of pain I give myself from my perfectionism, harsh inner critic, judgment of myself, feeling like a failure, feelings of insecurity, unacceptable behavior I have failed to change and berating myself for every small thing I think I do wrong. It’s no wonder why I don’t recover. These are all things I feel from when I wake up to when I lie down. I feel all this way and unable to share my true self.
By Calaen Burton 4 years ago in Journal
Breath into Her
They tell me to breath life into her, but that's what I'm afraid of. They say "Maybe you're not healing from the past, because you're trying to be who you once were, and that person is gone. There is a new, strong being, trying to be born. Breath life into her, and let her come forth."
By Josie Del Valle4 years ago in Journal
One World, One Sound.
When I was 7 years old, rapper/producer Dr. Dre released his album 2001. I remember when that album first came out and how it was one of the biggest records in the world at the time. What I also remember about that album from when it first came out was that this was the first time I had ever seen young white children listening to Hip-Hop. Up to this point in my life I had never seen anyone who was not black listening to Hip-Hop music before and I really learned something from this. What I learned is how music brings together people from all backgrounds and walks of life.
By Joe Patterson4 years ago in Journal
Why is Nobody Is Willing to Admit the Obvious? - Monkeypox is a Biological Attack
Note: The following article is my opinion. It is informed by 25 plus years of micro/molecular biology research and development experience, including significant experience in the areas of bacterial/viral diagnostics. You are free to disagree with any and all aspects of it. Though I make no claims to correctness (I never do), I do suggest you should at least consider the possibility that it is correct, and the implications thereof. It is important also to note that "Vocal does not accept stories that present personally-held beliefs about others or unfounded conspiracies as fact, or that implicate others in those beliefs." Since this article is an opinion article, nothing within it should be taken as "fact", and no one specific individual or group of individuals is implicated. Finally their is no conspiracy suggested or even implied. If there is a conspiracy at play, it is only one of ignorance and wishful thinking run amok.
By Everyday Junglist4 years ago in Journal
Not an actual doctor
I know! Random title but I hope it caught your eye. It’s true I am not a psychiatrist, counselor or a doctor. I am just a husband, father, warehouse manager, coach who suffers from being manic depressive along with PTSD from childhood trauma. I am not going to give you an actual doctors opinion, it’s not me. What I will give you is a part of my journey and advice on what I’ve experienced. So thank you for giving me a shot and reading this.
By DJ Wentzel4 years ago in Journal
The Cautionary Nature of My Love Life
I never seem to learn. In some ways, I feel annoyed at being able to pinpoint the unhealthy aspects I allow in a relationship. But then, in other ways, I don't really mind because I am who I am. I am unlikely to change without receiving a whole lot of [necessary] therapy. I find myself in a squeezing and suffocating position of seeing an issue, drawing correlations from my past; and knowing the root of my toxic behaviors, and why I allow others to treat me poorly. Even more frustrating, I can pinpoint the same facets in my lover with ease. With a compassionate spirit, I sigh and nod wisely. My sensitive feelings hurt, I cry as I also play therapist: "There, there, I know you lash out because you fear commitment; and you fear commitment because your mother withheld nurturing love until she was strong enough to do so, which means you feel love is conditional and you fear that once you allow it in, it may be pulled away."
By Rowena George4 years ago in Journal
The Joys of packing
Ah, yes. That time again. After all that house hunting you’re approved to move! There is so much psychology in everything we do. As humans we process change whether we like it or not. It’s a hard kind of process. But you just get in there and do it. You let go of the past, you let go of attachments and in the present all you want to do is get it over and done with!
By TheJuZShoW4 years ago in Journal
