Stop Worrying

Who doesn’t love stress and worry? The question is rhetorical. We know everyone loathes stress and worrying with a passion. One of the hardest things to do, but you still have to practice it is the art of not worrying.

What is worry and how does it consume us? To worry is to be anxious and uneasy about one’s personal troubles. It often gets to a point where it consumes our thoughts and our eventually our lives to the point where we are a complete mess. It’s not like our worries don’t have merit. Of course our worries have merit, especially when it comes to our health, finances, family lives and even our professional lives, but we can’t let our concerns for these issues turn into worry.

Though initial worry is natural, we have to let it pass over us so that it will eventually pass away or else negative effects take hold. What are the negative effects of worry? Where do we begin?

Over analyzing. To worry is to give our minds permission to wander. This wandering never leads to anywhere good. When we allow our minds to wander with worry we create big problems out of relatively small problems, or turn big problems into even bigger problems. Ever heard of analysis paralysis? This is what happens when allow our minds to be so consume with revisiting the subject of our worries that instead of figuring out how to solve our problems we just keep rehashing them over and over again with no real intentions of finding a solution.

Health. I was a little kid when an adult first told me that worry can impact your health and even kill you. I didn’t give it much thought at the time because my mindset as a kid was “well how can something that’s in your mind impact your physical well-being? I thought that only happened in the A Nightmare On Elm Street movies, but it turned out it was true. When you allow yourself to be consumed with worry your mental, emotional and even physical health is consumed in return. Many people have had heart attacks, strokes and aneurysms among other health complications due to being over consumed with worry.

Poor choices. How many of us have made the wrong decisions because worry was the motivation? I know I have and I’ve watched others act in the same vein. If you allow yourself to act out of worry you may make a rash decision that you can’t take back, one that may come with moral, interpersonal or even legal consequences. An important detail to remember is that worry is a fleeting feeling that will always pass, even if just for a brief moment, but the choices you make under its motivations will always exist.

How do we conquer worry? I think the solution lies in retracing our personal history with worrying. I went through a lot growing up. My childhood was just as troubled as the next kid’s. My parents were divorced for most of my childhood, yet they both dealt with family problems the same way. When my family was struggling, especially financially, it was always interesting to me that my parents never worried themselves to death, or even complained. All they ever did was just work on solving the problem. As a child I didn’t understand that resilience, but as an adult it’s how I aspire to live.

I now understand that I can’t allow myself to be swallowed by worry because it doesn’t solve your problems, it just disables you from solving or at the least working through them. Worrying also doesn’t take away tomorrow’s problems, it just stops you from appreciating today. If you have a conflict in your life you work through it to the best of your abilities. Meditate, say a prayer, write your problems down, maybe clear your mind and go out and practice your passions, do what you love.

More than anything I think it’s important to remember that most of the things you worry about are never as bad as you think they are or never gonna happen. Even when things are bad you just have to remind yourself that you’re gonna make it through like you always have. Find your solution, it won’t be easy but you can do it and no matter what, never let yourself be consumed by worry.