Risen

The alarm clock goes off at 5:55 am, and it's time to get up. I snooze a few times to laze for a few more minutes of shut-eye, but then I remember what it is I do for a living, and I spring out of bed. As I get ready, I prepare myself to be the best version of myself. Although I may wake up feeling the angst of fighting my depressive feelings, although I rise up against the thoughts that tell me, "remain in bed; the world has nothing for you," I get up. I love my job because I've been allowed to do more by caring for children who need it. This job that I love motivated me to become more focused on becoming the "superhero" I wished existed when I was weak. I work with children who have endured more pain than an anime fight scene where the hero is on the brink of death. They come with baggage, and they come with much outward projection of what they feel. I love my job because these brave and brilliant young men and women look at me as some sort of bright light at times. Their need to test my patience and drive me towards my specific limit teaches me who I am. They teach me that if I am patient and listen to them, I can help. It vicariously sharpens mine as I allow them to be themselves and use their tools from their toolboxes. I love my job because it fires my soul's wick, and the light source that is my soul carries my hollow body as flames have a hot air balloon.

Life comes from corkscrews and tests that are given to us daily to push us to become that "superhero" who can MAGNIFY the light we all carry inside by helping others find the batteries to power their inner light. I love my job because these kids do not quit, and their actions present what moments they've been through and what they have seen; all they need is what was not given to them by the ones they love, and that is an opportunity to be themselves. The light inside them has been tampered with and dimmed by outer influences who have invested their time in horrid and harsh lives where the outcomes only benefit the evil dweller within their veins. I love my job because these wondrous children allow me to power them as they power me to become the hero I need and needed my entire life.

The battle for territory in my emotional woods is between my depression and anxiety going against the hero who has been fighting the best he can. We all have a villain in us, a hero in us, a sage in us, and the most becoming is the child we carry. The child in us comes with a plethora of tests to see what we want and what we'll do to get it. I love my job because that spirit that fires me up is constantly being ignited by these children who still carry enormous hopes and dreams. I love my job because these children RAVE and SCREAM when you do something extraordinary. I love my job as much as I hate my depressive tendencies, and I feel a step closer every day in manifesting victory as these children manifest peace. I feel alive when they come to me for help, and I can provide them the insight they need. I am not a perfect person as I have failed many times, but I see failure as merely a step that leads me towards the staircase up to my version of heaven.

Finally, I love my job because I finally see my purpose, and after 28 years of bouncing from job to job and growing up bouncing from home to home, I've found something that is meaningful and has a purpose within my heart. The money isn't what gets me up in the morning; it's you, all of you. All you champions in the making deliver purpose to my being each and every day. Every road t victory has its ups and downs with what seems unconquerable obstacles, but the light we all carry inside is enough and will always be enough to power us on and up to and through anything. Life is a beautiful journey when you realize everything is beautiful. I love what I do because it made me understand what I am meant to do.