God is my cure!

Beginning of 2023, my faith in God was tested majorly. In January, I started to experience intense headaches that seemed to appear out of nowhere. These headaches swiftly became unbearable; they caused my vision to deteriorate and I also suffered nausea and vomiting.

Usually, I would avoid going to see medical professionals when I feel unwell but the consistent deterioration of my well-being could not be ignored. So, I first went to the opticians because I believed that the headaches were coming from something being wrong with my eyes. During my appointment, I was told that there was swelling of the optic nerve in my eyes. This swelling can be caused by pressure in or around the brain, which the optic nerve is connected to. When my appointment was over, I was told that I immediately needed to go to the A&E at the eye hospital. The urgency that was encouraged didn't cause me to have any worry just yet since I wasn't diagnosed with anything. After hours of waiting in the hospital, I was finally seen by someone who checked my eyes again and had the same findings as the optician I had seen previously. This person appeared just as concerned as the optician and told me that I needed an MRI scan. At this point, worry started to kick in because my connotations of MRI scans were dark. Based on my knowledge that there was potential that the swelling was caused by a serious medical condition, I started to feel fear.

Thankfully, the results of the scan showed that there was no life-threatening condition causing the headaches. However, I was diagnosed with Idiopathic Intracranial Hypertension. This is a rare neurological condition that occurs when there's too much cerebrospinal fluid build up around the brain, causing increased pressure. The doctors couldn't quite figure out why I had this condition but chalked it up to the fact that I was overweight. For treatment, there were a few things that could be done. I was encouraged to lose weight and focus on limiting salt in my diet. From the doctors, I was offered medication and a lumbar puncture. A lumbar puncture, also known as a spinal tap, is a procedure that involves inserting a needle into the lower back to extract a sample of cerebrospinal fluid. I did consent to having this procedure done but eventually decided against it after a failed attempt by one doctor. So, I just focused on my weight, diet and taking the medication given to me.

After taking the medication for a few weeks, I decided to stop taking it. The main two reasons were: I couldn’t stand the side effects and I wanted to grow my faith in God. I realised that the whole time I suffered with the headaches and was going back and forth to the hospital, I wasn't seeking Him. My prayer life was non-existent and I seemed to be placing more faith in the medical system than the Lord. Saying no to the lumbar puncture was an act of faith but I still went on to take medication, placing my faith in its ability to heal me. So, I made the conscious decision to replace my medication with prayer. “O LORD my God, I cried unto thee, and thou hast healed me.” Psalm 30:2, was a verse I meditated on while I believed in God for healing.

Within a short period, I noticed that my vision was beginning to become clearer and eventually the headaches were less frequent until they finally went away. At this time, I had repented to the Lord for placing my faith in man and not Him. I hadn't been a Christian for long and had also never experienced something so scary. Reflecting on this experience, I believe that my faith was being tested for me to grow in intimacy with God. Before experiencing Idiopathic Intracranial Hypertension, I took having good health for granted so I never thanked God for it nor prayed to keep it. This circumstance didn't just allow me to exercise 100% faith in God’s ability to heal but also allowed me to see my shortcomings when it came to seeking His face in my life. I understand why faith without works is dead because true faith is shown in our actions, not just our words. I showed God that I had faith in His ability to heal me by putting down the medication and believing in Him to take away the pain.

I would love to say that after this, I never doubted during difficult circumstances but I have. Every single time, I was reminded of the same thing: that God is good, even when my circumstances aren't. I learned that doubt comes from focusing more on our trials rather than God. I've heard it said that fear is faith in the wrong thing. Fear is a result of doubt because doubt causes us to expect an undesired outcome. Faith is a result of belief because belief [in God’s word] causes us to expect a desired outcome. I expected healing from my condition and that's exactly what I received. Praise God!