Dear Vivacity

Dear Vivacity,

Please except this letter as my resignation from the position of loyal hostess, the mad hatter of scapegoating and mistress adjudicator to the adjudicated. Effective immediately.

I have become so use to this position, use to being this way, I feel like Amanda in the movie 'The Holiday'. I can't be moved and even I am surprised. I know this can't be right. I'm not pointing fingers, but I feel you are partially to blame. 

I'd take a bow, but I am not suppose to be performing. So why do I feel I am permanently at the theater?  Always having to be on. The charm that use to come naturally has become somewhat forced. I need to rediscover this aspect of myself. Instead of a warning alarm in disguise, I'd rather be an open book. A what you see is what I feel kind of girl.

After thoughtful consideration I have decided to resign from my position. After 39 years I am ready for change. I concede my position to the next worthy individual. Someone hopefully better than I. A true showman or woman. Someone who can wink and smile in the middle of a storm knowing it shall pass. Someone who stands out as polished silver in a case of polished silver. Someone who makes those tarnished brighter just by reflection. Someone perhaps, who can better understand the relationship. I don't know how this came to pass. How heterosexual came to mean heteronomy. Remember a voice that fills the room will leave little room for silence to listen. It has become crowded at times. Stars are only beautiful because of the contrast in-between. Maybe you will find it best to eliminate the position all together, so there is nothing to miss.

I will be pursuing a position where autonomy for the sake of community is the rule and lesson. One where external motivations causing impulsivity and indecisiveness are not ploys to keep me in my place. Instead, they are encouragement to experience on the way to being experienced. Afterall, we all have the end goal of retiring an expert in something. The path to expert can be mercurial. It offers rough, cold, quiet, frenzied, and anxiety ridden patches at times. I may be unrecognizable. On the journey I don't need to chase after you, getting myself lost.

I choose to prioritize my growth and not from simply trying to stand taller in your presence. A slouching ego never measures up. It will not be easy for either of us to part, but necessary for the betterment of both. We will come out stronger in the end. Maybe we can work together again in the future. I am deeply grateful for the impeccable examples you have provided over the years. You supplied me with such a wealth over the years I'm almost unsure who worked for who. I can confidently confirm generations of examples. More than a few I paid for myself. The last lesson was costly. A raise would have been appreciated, but it seems the timing was off. Any raise at this point would be considered too little too late. Deep pockets aren't just stylish at this position they are at all positions. Thank you for the opportunity to fill mine with more than hidden hand gestures. I believe with what I have saved up I may be able to patch the holes and fill my pockets by the end of my life. I will keep your incidental guidance, which has been invaluable over the years, with me. I carry all the lessons I have garnered, like stones collected throughout my journey. I will drop each of them when necessary and free myself of the weighted burden as I get more comfortable. I will be sure to watch the ripples. I hope to use everything I have gained here on my way forward in my career. The biggest lessons should make the largest splash and waves. Sorry to drop this first stone, but thank you.

During this transition, I am committed to ensuring a smooth transition and transfer of power. I'll be present until the final shift, after which, I will no longer be available. Until that point, you can count on me to carry on as usual. I know how accommodating and moving a smile can be. Should you need me and encounter any issues after my resignation feel free to watch 'Mortal Kombat' and find the deeper meaning. The answers you seek I'm sure can be found there. Thank you. I hope to visit in the future, and possibly rejoin as a stronger partnership.

I hope you continue to thrive. I would warn there is a difference between holding someone hostage and employing a willing participant. Finding the right individual balance is so important.

Sincerely,

your most devout 

Brittney's Soul






Sent via the Samsung Galaxy S24