The Good the Bad and the Absurd

The sun stood over the river —its light, glistening across the ripples. The orb stood away from the buildings, so their shadows crossed over and under, Linda’s feet as she jogged.

A poor thing, if you asked her.

Linda has the sort of life, where a simple run, DOES leave something to be desired. Her rapid breathing and her inconsistent stride — which she considers to be metaphorical and not a sign that she’s out of shape; didn’t bother the others who ran past her. However, they were leaking from their pits and the farts they were holding in, could wait until they were away from anyone close enough to smell it.

-

She has without notice, or much concern, separated her mind from her responsibility to be fresh and clean for human consumption. Better yet, to provide a better living condition for her hard working shirt.

‘When was the last time you showered?’

Her shirt started to blow in the wind, which would be a much better explanation, but it was moving in the motion of its own speech.

‘Is anyone there?’

Broad daylight, with chatter around her and the sun still held to the left of her, she asked the question which might’ve been heard by the pigeons that were waddling by, though one of them looked a little drunk and the other was applying a second coat of lipgloss — HE was lagging behind.

‘You alright?’ A thick accent coming from behind her made her jump. With the remainder of her pride, she stood aside. With an awkward tilt of her neck, she looked at the stranger.

‘I could be going mad, - ’ she waddled like the pigeons as she said those words.

‘Sorry, just a nervous tic.’

‘Hearing voices, is it?‘

The woman ignored her waddle. She was more concerned about her own encounter with those ‘voices’, and how this stranger came about to hear them too.

‘Yes. No. I mean… maybe somewhere across, over there. Not too sure where it came from.’

The old lady looked at her shirt which was now divorced from her skin, her eyes resting there long enough for Linda to feel a rush towards an action.

‘Oh sorry, don’t want to be flashing you now, do I’

‘Your name? I’m Margaret.’

‘Linda,’

They did not shake hands, but the woman remained where she stood.

‘Would you like to come over for a cuppa, Linda?-‘

Her words, caught behind her pallet and stifled, going down her esophagus, as she looked down at a dog a couple was walking, across from them.

‘Sorry. I seem to have gotten something in my eye,’

Linda wasn’t too sure what to make of this. A stranger, an old stranger, crying in front of her. Her awkward hands could not reach out to comfort her. She had always known, that to walk up to a stranger, was a taboo thing to do; although she wasn’t sure if that word belonged.

‘Have you lost someone, Margaret? Perhaps a beloved burger that someone stole from your fridge?’

‘We are not quite on the same page, I’m afraid,’

Linda cleared her throat and her eyes followed the couple who were far out of sight to make a clear picture, or to be sure of what Margaret may've been looking at.

‘Not any good am I? How about that cuppa then…? I do get a bit more sympathetic when I haven’t had a run.’

Margaret was certain Linda had not caught on, that she lost her dog, and that this was the first time Margret had ever reached out to talk to anyone about it.

‘If it’s not too much to ask of course, I don’t want to take you away from…well, your other obligations...’

She said as they both exchanged numbers. Whether she was being rude, or just sobered by her loss, could not be approached with any real certainty.

*

At the grocery store

‘Bro it’s Linda, you think she will pick you up and bring you home this time?’

Said the herb. It had gotten down off the shelf and took a couple strides, towards the vegetable stand.

‘I’d be surprised if she remembers the coconut milk and the curry powder, besides, I’m too much of an hour glass for her.’

She said while holding Linda’s grocery list in her hand, the list that Linda carelessly dropped.

‘Aye, shut up. Are you trying to say I am fat and shapeless?’ Said the onion.

‘Low self esteem is a hell of a drug,’ Said the aubergine.

‘I’m pretty sure you should be under arrest for being both healthy and brainless, and in my opinion, the parsnip would beg to differ, you aren’t all that .’ The onion was upset but justified.

The herb decided to leave the scene.

Before the aubergine had any plans of her own, she did the honours, she picked up her roommate and launched into Linda’s basket. The list called for two sexy aubergines.

A/ N : thank you so much for reading 🙏🏽♥️🤗