FUNNY GAMES

1. A man walks into a library and asks the librarian for a book on how to commit suicide. The librarian responds, "I'm sorry, sir, I can't let you check it out. It's already overdue."

2. A man was driving down the highway when he saw a sign that read, "Don't try to change lanes in traffic." He thought to himself, "Challenge accepted!" And promptly crashed into the car in front of him.

3. A man walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender asks, "What can I get you?" The man responds, "I'll have a beer, and make it quick. I'm in a hurry." The bartender then hands him a bottle of beer and says, "Here you go, sir. That'll be $10." The man looks at him incredulously and asks, "Ten dollars for a beer? That's outrageous!" The bartender replies, "Well, you said you were in a hurry.

4. A man walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender asks, "Why do you have a parrot on your shoulder?" The parrot responds, "I'm his wingman. He's trying to pick up chicks."

5. A woman calls her husband at work and says, "Honey, the car won't start. What should I do?" The husband responds, "Is there gas in the tank?" The woman looks at the gas gauge and says, "Oh, I didn't even think to check that." The husband sighs and says, "Okay, well, put some gas in the tank and try again." The woman responds, "Oh, okay. But where do I put the gas?" The husband can't help but laugh and says, "Oh boy, we have a lot to talk about when I get home."

6. A man walks into a restaurant and orders a steak. The waiter asks, "How would you like it cooked?" The man responds, "Well done." The waiter nods and says, "Okay, but it'll take a while. We'll have to go out and kill.

7. A man walks into a doctor's office and says, "Doc, I think I'm a moth." The doctor responds, "I'm sorry, but this is a doctor's office. You need to see a psychiatrist." The man says, "I know, but your light was on."

8. A man goes to the zoo and sees a gorilla reading a book. He can't believe his eyes and walks up to the gorilla and asks, "What are you reading?" The gorilla responds, "The Origin of Species by Charles Darwin." The man is flabbergasted and asks, "How did you learn to read?" The gorilla responds, "Well, I had a lot of time on my hands during captivity."

9. A woman goes to the doctor and complains of stomach pain. The doctor examines her and says, "I'm sorry, but you're pregnant." The woman responds, "That's impossible. I've been celibate for years." The doctor looks at her and says, "Well, it looks like you're about to give birth to the second coming of Christ."

Hope those made you laugh!

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10. A man goes to a zoo and sees a lion. The lion starts chasing him, and the man runs as fast as he can. After a few minutes, the man stops, turns around, and yells at the lion, "What's wrong with you? I paid good money to see the other animals!"

11. A man walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender asks him, "What's the occasion?" The man responds, "I just got a promotion at work." The bartender congratulates him and says, "Well, you should order another drink. It's on the house." The man responds, "Thanks, but I don't want to celebrate too much. I have to go back to work tomorrow."

12. A man goes to a doctor and says, "Doc, I have a problem. Every time I sneeze, I have an orgasm." The doctor examines him and says, "I've never heard of that before. What medication are you taking?" The man responds, "