Will Inner-Party Dating Form Lasting Relationships with Filipino Women?

In the past year, the dating scene has evolved dramatically due to the impact of the coronavirus pandemic.

Face-to-face interactions turn into virtual meet-ups, watching movies in cinemas becomes screen sharing, and long night companionship becomes long night video calls. Though these kinds of dating setups aren't new at all, they have become the prevalent norms of most daters because there are no other options.

One commonality among online daters is that they slowly get attached to someone who shares the same interest as them.

In the Philippines, most Filipino people have become more aware of the current societal issues in the country, which somehow influence their standards when they date someone they meet online.

Addressing local and foreign men, relationships with Filipino women don't just involve flowers, chocolates, and food delivered door-to-door. This can also include your nationalistic and political perspectives.

All users of online dating sites know that they have the option to write a short biography for other users to know what they are looking for in someone they want to date. With this, they can specify the type of person they're seeking and their intentions.

"I am looking for someone who shares the same views as mine. If you aren't pro-turtle, swipe left."

This is just one of the many examples of online dating biographies. Users don't need to give descriptions of themselves, and instead, they directly indicate the type of person or people they are interested in meeting.

As such, there is a dating trend known as the “inner-party,” wherein men and women prefer to date someone who supports the same political party.

In a recent survey conducted by one of the best dating apps, most online daters agree that dating outside one's own political party doesn't last in terms of contemporary romantic connections.

Nowadays, what's happening around is everybody's concern, especially if it deals with the common good.

So the question is, does inner-party dating contribute to forming a lasting commitment with a Filipina? Or is it the other way around?

Positive Features of Inner-Party Dating

• It doesn't cause any initial turn-offs.

Filipino men and women, in general, are keen on observing someone's conduct, demeanor, and stance. In simple terms, they like meeting those who are similar to them in most aspects.

Being in an inner-party dating setup, specifically, is an attraction for most Filipinas because they know that you can both exchange substantial points of views about diplomacy in the country.

Thus, your dating phase may go a long way.

• It makes you more interested in the person.

Meeting someone who has the same taste in music as you makes you more engaged with them.

In analogy, having a similar political stance with someone you started dating makes you more interested in knowing them. For this reason, one question generates a lengthy answer, producing follow-up questions.

The more similar you are to the person, the more time you want to spend with them.

• It lessens the struggle of your future commitment.

The importance of dating and courtship is to uphold the idea of a lasting and healthy relationship with your partner. It is a crucial and significant step to have deeper knowledge and understanding of one another.

According to a study by Afifi and colleagues in 2019, they found that couples who voted differently in recent elections were prone to struggles in relationships.

In other words, people who prefer political equals have better relationship quality.

Drawbacks of Cross-Party Dating vis-à-vis Inner-Party Dating

• It triggers "conditional self-worth."

It can't be denied that even some Filipinos desire to have a partner with whom they are not politically divided, and yet there are some who end up being partnered with or married to their political opposites.

This circumstance in some relationships triggers either men or women to experience conditional self-worth — the inability to hear others out.

They impose their political stance and demand for their partner to agree with them, validate their views, and let them feel worthy.

They also want to be heard most of the time and disallow others to speak.

As a result, respect is indifferent.

• It serves as blinkers.

Imagine a chariot with its horse wearing blinkers on the streets. When the horse trots, it doesn't look in its rearview, but it's focused on a straight direction.

This example can be associated with how someone views their belief as superior and disregards others.

The moment a person becomes avid about a single diplomatic standpoint, they forget to be open-minded, making themselves prejudiced.

This kind of belief serves as their blinkers, thinking that there is nothing better or greater than what they believe.

Therefore, they are very reluctant to change and have fresh ideas.

• It becomes a deal breaker.

Each person has their own principles to keep and preserve. That being said, even Filipina women are willing to get involved in verbal sparring or become keyboard warriors just to defend their side.

As a result, conflict and argument tend to occur between couples. No one is willing to automatically swallow their pride for the sake of the relationship.

The longer you keep on arguing about the same subject matter, the higher the chances of you deciding to end the relationship.

Sometimes, others think that it's just politics, but for some, it’s something valuable.

Making Relationships Last Through Shared Beliefs

In this present day, Filipinos are known for being politically and socially aware about the current situation in their country. A lot of aspects in someone’s existence have been influenced by the underlying factors of such reality.

For this reason, dating in the Philippines has become more engaging than ever. Political stance has been one of the hot topics that couples talk about and sometimes disagree on.

Despite the realities of inner-party relationships, however, couples need to see and weigh the factors that affect their future of being together.

The social media age shapes the point of view of most Filipinos on the personal and political spectrum. Thus, couples need to see what’s best for their relationship, recognize each other, and be aware of their values and priorities in order to remain together.

Just remember, it’s essential to respect your partner’s stance with regards to social and political issues. Politics should never be the foundation of your relationship.

What’s important is that you know the difference between a healthy argument and a toxic disagreement.