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What Values ​​Should Parents Pass On to Their Children to Guide Them through All the Challenges?

Raising a Moral Child Is Important

By Ted NavaPublished 4 years ago 5 min read
What Values ​​Should Parents Pass On to Their Children to Guide Them through All the Challenges?
Photo by CDC on Unsplash

What values ​​should you pass on as parents to your child? How to raise a child with an internal moral compass to guide him, to help him in all the challenges he will face? Morality - the internal values ​​of the person - is learned, first of all from the family, from the parents. The values ​​transmitted by the parents are internalized by the child, becoming part of his reference system.

Morality, values ​​are today more ideal principles than principles of action; conceptions of values ​​and morality become less clear and concise - the common code of morality is replaced by different perspectives on what is or is not moral. Moreover, today, in some situations, morality is confronted with in interest (in front of which it loses ground): "it would be moral to act in a way, but the other way is simpler and more fruitful; anyway, no one respects the ideals "…

The person internalizes certain principles and forms a code of morality and a moral compass that will guide him throughout his life, depending on the models he will have at hand. Who are these important role models in transmitting values ​​and informing a morality - parents!

What does it mean to raise a child and what values ​​should parents pass on to them? The values ​​that make him an integral person - a person with an inner moral conscience, able to distinguish and choose between a simple (but maybe immoral) path and a correct path. It may seem like "outdated" values ​​today - those who do best in today's world are the ones who can go beyond principles and do what needs to be done without remorse. One slogan today is anything to get what you want! How much morality is there in this slogan?

More importantly, is it true that people with questionable morals will have a better life? Apparently - because they will violate any principles and will have superficial external values; but happiness involves inner balance; and for inner balance, to be at peace with who you are, you need an internal moral compass to help you make healthy and good choices (and not just the right ones)!

How do you raise a moral child, who internalizes authentic (and not superficial) values, who will have a moral compass that will always guide him? How do you teach a child to see, to know the difference between good and evil - what do good and evil mean? First of all, by offering a concrete model - you!

Because you can clarify his ideas of morality, the notions of good and evil through stories and explanations, by praising or criticizing him - but morality will become an internal part of the child's reference system by exposing him to the patterns of thinking and action around him. Morality is not just a set of external rules that must be observed - it must be a set of internal principles, beliefs about what is valuable, what is good or not (without being internal, the rules do not have force).

Raise a moral child - what authentic values ​​to pass on to the child:

Empathy - sensitivity to others. It was believed that empathy, the ability to relate to others, to understand them, and to respond appropriately to what they convey, would be an innate quality. As false as possible: parents can teach their children to be empathetic, showing them how important it is to care about others, to see their feelings, and to respond to them.

Without empathy, a person cannot have healthy relationships; without empathy, a person cannot be a moral person. Empathy means the ability and willingness to see and respond to the person next to you - to put yourself in his place.

In the child, it is so important to learn the value of empathy: the child often looks at things only from his point of view; moreover, he sometimes does not understand that others have similar experiences to his own and can behave inappropriately without realizing that it hurts other people.

Respect for others. Respect for value is not just about teaching the child good manners; it refers to teaching him the importance of behaving with others as you want to be treated. It also means showing respect to the child, not just asking for respect.

Sincerity. What values ​​to pass on to the child and how do you raise a moral child? Teaching him that it is okay to be himself and to express his thoughts and emotions. Sincerity is still a common value today - not always; Today's world teaches us to hide, to pretend, and to lie to get what we want or to avoid unpleasant situations.

To teach the child, however, the value of sincerity means to give him the gift of being what he is, no matter what others think. But his parents face great difficulties: how to encourage him to be honest if his sincerity offends others or causes problematic situations? Simple - combining sincerity with empathy and respect: being who you are, without pretending, telling the truth, but without saying anything that would hurt others (what you don't like to hear from others, don't tell others).

Without teaching the child the value of sincerity, of truth, he will learn instead how easy it is to lie and cheat. The model you give him and the way you react when he tells a truth or a lie are the most important.

Courage. How to raise a moral child? Giving him self-confidence and the strength to have the courage to choose what his inner compass tells him is good, no matter if it's hard and no matter if others contradict him. This means the value of inner courage. A moral person will have the strength to choose the truly good path, even if it is the hardest; he will trust that his choice is the right one, without being fooled or tempted.

Responsibility for one's documents. What values ​​to pass on to the child, how do you raise a moral child? By teaching him that every action will have repercussions - and you can't run away indefinitely, you can't hide, you can't escape the effects of your actions. The only way to teach a child to think twice before acting is to confront him from the beginning with the effects of his actions.

Not to protect him indefinitely, not to make and repair things in his place. It is also the only way to raise a strong child, who does not blame others for his failures, but assumes both failures and successes, knowing that in him lies the strength to succeed, not in others.

And it is the way to show them that it is okay to make mistakes, to acknowledge them, and then to make things better… Being responsible for your actions involves being honest and being fair give the child, through stories, examples, choices, and… model).

Tolerance. In today's world, raising a moral child means teaching him what tolerance means. We live with different people (social status, professions, races, religions, abilities, or disabilities) - and the value of tolerance is essential. Not to judge a man only by appearances, by differences, but to accept that, although he is different, he is a man like others.

Learning tolerance means learning the value of individuality, respect, and humanity. Unfortunately, some parents raise an intolerant child, giving them a model of rejection and discrimination (not only in the face of minorities but also of different people; for example, some parents do not allow their children to play with their children. from poor families or families with problems, the child will learn to judge the different, disadvantaged, considering himself superior only because he was lucky to be part of a good family!).

Being tolerant is not easy: what is different often causes fear and rejection; but to be tolerant means to be a moral person, with respect for man and who values ​​depth and not appearances…

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