What Not To Do On Valentine’s Day

The traditional day of love in many Western countries around the world (including Canada, where I live), Valentine’s Day is a popular day for romantic partners to show their affection for one another.

It’s not just lovers that are happy, either. Merchandise for the occasion is very profitable thanks to the somewhat less common efforts of certain friends and family that use more platonic gifts as tokens of appreciation.

So if you’re reading this article on February 14 and happen to partake in the festivities, happy Valentine’s Day! May all your relationships be healthy and hopeful. With that being said, other people also want to enjoy it as well.

This article will go over what you shouldn’t be doing on the Hallmark day of love. From being creepy to borderline religious zealotry, there are definitely some things to avoid on Valentine’s Day to avoid being a jerk.

Please note that following the guidelines below may not fully guarantee your Valentine’s Day goes smoothly. However, I hope it can be of at least some use.

Be A Creep

The first thing - and perhaps one of the most important things - to avoid on Valentine’s Day is being a creep.

This can consist of many things. There’s the obvious like not sexually assaulting anyone. But that’s such a low bar that should be easy to pass (although, unfortunately, not for everyone). Other seemingly more tame, if ideally completely unacceptable, include forcibly kissing people and repeatedly trying to actively hit on someone after being turned down.

Valentine’s Day can be a great day for physical intimacy - if it’s unambiguously consensual. Doing it to anyone who does not give explicit permission, be it a strange or a loved one, is a violation of boundaries at best and potentially traumatizing at worst.

Dump Someone Who Celebrates (For No Good Reason)

Valentine’s Day should be the day of love, not the day of heartbreak for those who celebrate. As such, breaking a celebrant’s heart via a method like a breakup during the holiday is an act of bitter irony.

Don’t get me wrong, there are definitely very valid reasons to dump an intimate partner. From cheating to abusiveness and just general incompatibility, there are absolutely relationships that need to end regardless of when.

However, a romantic partnership that is going swimmingly is not something that should be abruptly ended - especially on a day where happy romantic memories are supposed to be created. If you’re gonna do it, at least try and pick a better time.

Throw Out Presents In Front Of Gifters

It’s one thing to throw out any sort of holiday present. It isn’t necessarily a bad thing. Sometimes, even the most well-intentioned loved ones don’t quite understand what you truly want.

That being said, throwing a gift in the garbage can right in front of the very person that gave it to you is almost always pretty rude at best. Chances are that they've put at least some sort of significant effort into it - be it running errands around different shops or crafting something by hand. Do you really want them to feel like they’ve used their energy for nothing?

Even if whoever gave you a present is insufferable, you are often likely to make more of a scene and/or incur their wrath if you dispose of their present to you right in front of them. Needless to say, giving them more ammunition to guilt trip you isn’t an ideal scenario.

Be A Zealot

While Valentine’s Day is a popular celebration in many parts of the world, not everyone celebrates it. There are several possible reasons why, and it’s important to respect people’s decisions whether or not you celebrate.

Maybe they don’t celebrate it for religious or cultural reasons. Valentine’s Day is mainly a Western holiday which technically has roots in a Christian saint day, after all. Perhaps it’s because of the consumerism frequently associated with the day. Maybe it’s the common romantic connotations clashing with singlehood or trauma from the holiday.

Regardless of what it is, there is no need to be a jerk to people for not having the Valentine’s Day spirit. If you’d be annoyed by some random person from another culture walking up to you and pressuring you into celebrating their occasions, think about how you’d come off to them.

Be A Jerk

Finally, just don’t be a jerk in general. This should really apply all year, honestly.

Oh yeah, and definitely don’t break the law. Unless it’s a horrifically oppressive law, in which case, I have to say: good luck.

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Following these guidelines could be the first step in having a wonderful February 14!

Any other thoughts on this? Let me know in the comments!

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