Truth and Falsehood

One day, Truth and Falsehood went for a swim in the lake. While Truth had her attention elsewhere, Falsehood snuck back onto the shore and changed into Truth's clothes.

They didn't fit very well. Falsehood was making adjustments when Enthusiasm came along.

"Oh hey! Hi! What's up? New duds? I like that, that's very avant-garde, with the way they hang like that. Is that a new style?" Enthusiasm bubbled. "I love new styles!"

"Do you like it?" asked Falsehood, posing. "It is new! I came up with it. I call it Nuevo Novo." One over-long sleeve dangled past her hand as she struck a winning posture. "I could be in magazines."

"Oh yes! Magazines are so great, I can't get enough of them. You could be on the cover of -Not Bad!- or--"

The sound of running footsteps caused the two of them to look up. Confusion came bounding in, looking harried. "What's going on?! Who is that? What are you wearing? Are the legs supposed to be that tight? Is this a new thing I don't know about?!" cried Confusion, looking around rather frantically.

"That's right," said Falsehood, "It's all the rage!" She moved to pat him on the shoulder, but Confusion, misinterpreting the gesture, shot out one arm instead in a handshake. "Hello?! Have we met? I thought we met on Tues... tuesday... what time is it?! I think I left the stove on...!"

Enthusiasm punched up into the air and cried, "Stoves! Yeah!"

Falsehood rolled her eyes and tried to smooth out the bulges in her shirt. She noticed two figures coming down the hill. "Oh look, here comes--"

"Crap!" shouted Frustration. "What is this! What are you wearing? Why? Why different?!" Frustration shoved past Enthusiasm and flailed his arms about. "This is B.S!"

"It's okay," said Patience, who was strolling along close behind, "It's just Falsehood trying out something new. Besides, you love complaining about bright colors. Hello Falsehood," she nodded. Falsehood smiled and pulled up her pants a little, which immediately sagged back down to just slightly less than acceptable waist level.

Frustration kicked at the dirt angrily. "Shut it! French Fuchsia is terrible and you know it. And would you stop that clapping!" He glared at Enthusiasm. Enthusiasm, unhampered, danced off a little ways, admiring everything.

"And what's that guy's problem, anyway?!" ranted Frustration, pointing towards Confusion. In the distance, Confusion had found Chaos, who was throwing handfuls of dirt at the sun, laughing manaiacally. From the looks of it, he had recently taken a bite out of the tree that Confusion was trying desperately to understand.

"Dudes!" said Gullibility, who had wandered into the fray, "I heard you can totally live on tree bark, for like, most of your adult life. Like, for reals. Whoa, hey Truth! Looking real sharp!" Gullibility bobbed his head up and down. "All right, all right."

"That's not Truth," explained Patience, "that's--"

"An abomination!" roared Moralism, jumping in with bravado, "We cannot allow these deceptions of verity to blatanty parade in front of our ideals and openly mock the hallowed perspicacity with which..."

"That reminds me of a story from my later youth," interjected Long-Windedness, who was close in tow. He adjusted his reading glasses. "You see, when I was seven years old, perhaps seven and three quarters, it happened upon a crisp autumn day that I was dutifully tending to the hay-piles which stacked upon each other like bales of golden straw..."

The scene continued on the edge of the lake. Before long, Clarity had shown up, followed by Mirth, Good Fortune, Illness, Mild Concern, Assurance, Resent, Inferiority, Restlessness, Humility, Overwhelming Bliss, Doubt, Agony and Carl. It had become quite a crowd.

Clarity was helping Falsehood with her wardrobe. "Well, you know darling..." she said, holding a pin in her mouth as they both stepped over Agony, who was writhing on the ground, "The real problem isn't these clothes, it's--"

"Hey," said Brevity, a little late for the party.

Confusion leaned over towards Inferiority. "Who the heck is that guy?"

"I don't know," sighed Inferiority, "I wish I was as Brevitous."

Carl spoke up. "I think..."

"Wrong story, Carl!" shouted everyone in unison. Carl ambled off down the sunny side of the road.

Frustration and Enthusiasm had gotten into a slap fight, which Enthusiasm was enjoying every moment of. Chaos ran from person to person, untying shoelaces and generally acting insane. Falsehood continued to work on her wardrobe while Moralism ranted about the state of affairs of the nation's youth today. In the midst of the action, nobody noticed when Truth arrived.

"Hey," she said, calmly eating an apple.

Silence followed. Everyone stopped what they were doing to look over at Truth.

"Um," said Mild Concern.

"Oh," said Falsehood.

"She's--!" gaped Moralism, at a miraculous loss for words.

"Naked!!" cheered Enthusiasm, jumping up into the air.

There was a long, very quiet moment.

"Nice," said Brevity.

"I, uh..." stammered Falsehood, "Ha! You see...I, haha, I thought you'd, you know... er... so, um... I, uh, was just trying these on..." A shirt button flew off with a sudden pop and landed solemnly on the ground.

Falsehood grinned sheepishly. "So... what do you think?!"

Truth smiled and handed Falsehood her clothes, folded into a neat little bundle, and walked off.