This Is What Happens When You Leave A Narcissist

When you make the decision to leave, the narcissist is going to experience both pain and distress. They often experience waves of instability and immense insecurity.

They are struggling without your source of supply. You were there for them to unload all of their emotional baggage, to use as their emotional punching bag. To let out all of their frustration and resentment.

They may have used you for financial purposes as well. When you left the narcissist they can end up in a worse situation than they were with you. It's not so easy for them to find another source of supply, it's not so easy for them to find another person who is willing to do the things that you were willing to do for them - Someone who is willing to put up with everything they do.

But the narcissist is audacious and arrogant. They believe that they can find someone better in no time. But of course it doesn't take long until they realize that it is not that simple.

But they can't let you see it, they can't let you know about it because they want you to see them as though they are superior to you.

They have to create the illusion that they are doing better without you. They have such weak, fragile egos they have low self-esteem and they have far too much pride to ever let you see or hear about what they are going through, but the reality is that they are indeed struggling. Many of them are having to work extra hard just to make a fraction of what they were making when they were with you.

Once they find a sub-par version of what was, they begin to feel very uncomfortable in their new environment as they come to realize it's not stable or secure.

Since they don't feel comfortable, they don't know if they can trust their new source of supply. Yet what they displayed to you is probably far different to the reality of what they are going through. They are probably posting pictures on social media, making you believe that they have the perfect life with the new supply and everything is so much better.

They really like to exaggerate it in an attempt to hurt you, but it's that exaggeration that should really reveal to you that it's all a lie.

They do whatever they can to avoid reality. Reality is too painful for them to deal with, because they have avoided it for too long. If they tried to deal with it now, it would just be too overwhelming for them.

So even after the relationship is over they are still living a lie, still trying to make you buy into their false appearance or impression. If they can get you to believe it, it makes it more believable for them and then they can live in their little fantasy world, denying the truth and reality.

But the reality is that they are struggling, they just don't want you to see or hear about it because they're ashamed. They are shame-based individuals, doing everything they can to avoid reflecting on their shame.

Anytime that you try to confront them on something that might trigger them to reflect on their shame, it causes a narcissistic injury.

Narcissistic injury is experienced by narcissists when they receive any kind of criticism. This includes any critique that a narcissist perceived as a slight even if it wasn't meant that way. Injury also occurs when a narcissist is faced with judgment, is held accountable, or when boundaries are placed upon them. The narcissist often reacts with anger and rage once an injury is inflicted on them. (ChoosingTherapy.com)

Then they have to make you feel as though something is wrong with you or as though your life is not going right. They wish that they could come back to you, things were so much easier then. Especially if you've made use of the time apart to heal yourself and create a better life for yourself, believe me they would love to come back.

But if you've seen through them, they know that they can't come back, they know that you're no longer going to be susceptible to their manipulation.

From your absence, the narcissist suffers and rightfully so.