The first day

Sure im young but im not stupid. I knew he would fall in love with me again but im just waiting for it to end because I know it will. Or maybe it wont. I guess I will have to wait but for now here is the story.

I have had a few boyfriends none super serious. If you count elementary school and sitting next to each other in lunch or your mom picking a boy and his friend up to go to family swim with you then I have had a few.

It was seventh grade and I started off the school year with a horrible boyfriend. Ugh! It was really one sided, he never put any effort in. When we had plans he would cancel. I always texted him first, he was friends with a bunch of girls and he never wanted to talk on the phone. Anyway that started around the end of October. Went through November and then he broke up with me. But boy am I glad he did. I was completely ruining myself for him. I told myself I wouldn't ever do that again.

About 3 weeks later I crossed paths with my elementary boyfriend/crush. Obviously we never got over each other. We hung out on Halloween and thats when we started texting. But the thing about this boy is that no matter what he did to me in elementary school (he pranked me saying he liked me and we were a on and off couple for like a whole year)I would always go back to him. After me and the other boy broke up he told me he liked me. He told me while I was playing my first game of fortnite with him and another boy in my grade. I could tell he liked me because my sister warned me that he was very mean while playing wanting to win, but he didn't seem to tell me how bad I played. He sent blue hearts at the end and would team up with me to kill the other player. I was surprised and at first I didn't believe him, me thinking it was a prank, I just texted him for a while calling every once in a while. I wouldn't let him date me until I believed him.

One Friday him and a few other of the neighborhood kids came over to the house we are renovating. I finally let him date me.

He said he loved me. We held hands. He met my dad, no one meets my dad. He was even my first kiss.

We dated from December 18th to January 29th.

I dont love him anymore. And I wouldn't go back to him like I said. This was his last chance. I was too young to be in this much pain.

Im happier though. I have more self confidence than I ever did.

Sometimes I just wonder if any of his friends ever asked him why he was hurting someone who cared for him. They're 13, 13 year old boys aren't sentimental like that.

But was it all fake? Did he do this on purpose? Why did I ever trust him?

Even though parts of me knew how it would end, I didn't think it would end this soon. Maybe it could have worked. Or maybe not.

All I know is that he is the best thing that has ever happened to me. In positive and negative ways. Positive because I see myself better than before. Even though he said I was beautiful I already knew I was I just needed something to yank it out of the ground. And now that it was... Im finally the happiest I have ever been.

Negative ways is that I wont trust again. I wont open up, and I wont tell people my problems. He said I was being dramatic. But I wasn't... I predicted what was going to happen and it did. So, lesson learned.