The best way to cherish your life: stop internal friction

Martin Garrard, a famous American psychologist, did an experiment:

Before the execution, the judge ordered a wooden chip to slash the prisoner's left wrist.

Then, turn on the tap and drip water into the copper basin under the bed, making a ding-dong sound.

The sound of dripping water is from fast to slow, causing great fear.

A day later, the judge came here again and found that the criminal was seriously ill.

But, in fact, he didn't shed a drop of blood.

The most typical state of internal friction is like this, the body does not move and the mind is active.

If you think too much, the heart will be scattered, and if the heart is scattered, the will will be weakened.

Only refusing internal friction is the best antidote to life.

What makes you tired is thinking about everything

On February 9, during the Beijing Winter Olympics.

In the men's 1500m short track speed skating semi-final, world No. 1 Ren Ziwei was dismissed early because of a foul and missed the final.

When reviewing his mistakes, Ren Ziwei said the most:

I failed because I thought too much.

Before the semi-finals, everyone was optimistic about Ren Ziwei, expecting him to win the third gold medal.

Ren Ziwei himself has been thinking about: how to rush to the first place in the final, which tactics to use to win fast, and what to do if you can't get the first place...

Excessive thinking before the game made him carry a heavy mental burden.

As a result, during the official competition, Ren Ziwei was in poor sliding condition, made a low-level mistake, and was cancelled due to a collision foul.

Ren Ziwei says:

"The semi-final is not over, but I keep thinking about the final.

Before the game, I had already lost half of it. "

The old saying goes: "Those who have intentions are tired, and those who have no intentions don't care."

A lot of times, people are tired in life, not because of the difficulties they encounter, but because they think too much.

If you think too much about a small thing, you will be unhappy; if you think too much about a big thing, you will be under pressure;

If you think too much about a good thing, you will worry about gains and losses; if you think too much about a bad thing, you will have trouble sleeping.

If the mind is simple, the world is simple; if the mind is complex, the world is complex.

Life is tired, tired in the heart; if the heart is not tired, people will not be tired.

The most terrifying thing about a person is not how many failures he has along the way, but when he should be focused on moving forward, he is stumped by all kinds of thoughts.

In your life, do you often do this:

There is plenty of time for the exam tomorrow, but I still have to worry about whether I can catch up;

I have said everything during the day, but before going to bed at night, I still have to ponder whether I should say it or not;

When others perform and sing and win the attention of the audience, I will mutter: If I also participate...

The psychologist said: "Overthinking everything is a kind of internal friction. It not only can't help you, but also drains all your energy."

The worst loss in the world is to worry about what has not happened yet, and worry about the results that you have imagined.

Human energy is limited, don't take everything to heart.

In life, do your best; in emotional matters, let it flow.

To stop mental internal friction and not to think too much about everything is the best state of life for a person.

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What makes you miserable is emotional internal friction

Psychologist Mike told the story of a patient:

One day, Hall looked through his Moments before going to bed and found that his colleague Alan had liked all his mutual friends, but he had not liked himself.

Hall is very disappointed. He thinks that his work performance is mediocre, his relationship with the leadership is mediocre, and he has no hope of promotion in the near future.

He felt that not only Allen, but also his colleagues looked down on him.

He regretted that he should not be reluctant to give up money and did not give gifts to the leaders.

The more he thought about it, the more sad he became, so much so that he couldn't sleep all night.

Early the next morning, I sent my daughter to kindergarten.

After being reminded by the teacher, Hall remembered that the kindergarten was holding activities today, and the teacher sent a notice yesterday to wear a dress, but he forgot about it.

It was too late to go home and change clothes, so my daughter had to be disqualified from the event.

Looking at his daughter standing alone, Hall blamed himself very much, feeling that his family would be excluded because he was not promising.

Since then, Hall has become depressed.

The casual remarks of others made him fall into deep self-blame and sadness.

He began to lose sleep, lost a lot of hair, and became haggard.

There are no things much ado about.

Some pain stems from obsessing over the small things in front of you, and magnifying the unsatisfactory things.

The famous "Festinger's Law" states:

10% of your life is made up of what happens to you, and the other 90% is determined by how you react to what happens.

For a sensitive person, a simple word or an inadvertent action of others may affect his heart, affect his mood, and affect his mood.

However, everything has good and bad.

The more you care about something, the more it will torment you.

If you care about other people's opinions, you will be nervous because of shyness; if you pay attention to other people's opinions, you will blame yourself for mistakes; if you look forward to other people's evaluation, you will be miserable because of mediocrity.

There are many hardships in life, and you don't have to fall into internal friction for every little thing.

Those who criticize you may be accustomed to being critical; those who ignore you are but indifferent by nature.

The most sober cognition of a person is to understand the words and deeds of others, and it has nothing to do with oneself.

Peace of mind and getting out of internal friction are the beginning of a strong life.

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Rejecting internal friction is the best antidote to life

Xiaoli and Zhuyun, the owners of two neighboring clothing stores, were unable to make ends meet during the epidemic and were forced to close their stores.

After the store closed, both fell into depression.

Zhu Yun sighed and sighed all day long, complaining about natural and man-made disasters, not eating well and sleeping well every day, and often quarreling with people, causing acquaintances to avoid them one after another.

Xiaoli was also depressed for a while, but she quickly cheered up and learned to live broadcast and bring goods online.

During the day, she tries on clothes in front of the camera while explaining.

In the evening, she repeatedly watched the live broadcast videos of other anchors, and joined several live broadcast groups to learn live broadcast skills.

In two months, Xiaoli studied more than 100 live broadcasts and wrote a thick notebook.

Now, Xiaoli has her own fan base.

Not only did the repurchase continue, but the number of new fans also increased sharply, and the sales volume was several times higher than before.

Life is always unsatisfactory. Instead of being tortured by mental internal friction, it is better to heal yourself with actions.

Maybe, action can't bring you success right away, but it can get you out of trouble slowly.

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Walk every day, not afraid of thousands of miles; do it every day, not afraid of thousands of things.

Those who look better than you just get rid of internal friction earlier than you.

Only by not being disturbed by external things can you enrich your soul; only by not punishing yourself for the faults of others can you live a relaxed and comfortable life.

Zeng Guofan said: "If things come to you, you will not welcome them in the future. At that time, you will not be mixed up, and you will not be in love with each other."

A wide heart means no worries; a big heart means no worries.

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As the saying goes: "Empty talk is the bubble of water; action is the drip of gold."

Do things, not afraid of slow, afraid of breaking.

When others are still hesitating about "should you do it", you take the first step and beat most people.

As snowboard champion Su Yiming said: "What's ahead? Slide down and you'll have the answer."

The easiest medicine to cure internal friction is immediate action.

Rejecting internal friction and taking immediate action is the beginning of a better life.