The 3 People You Need in Your Creative Corner

I spent over a decade not sharing my work -- with anyone. I didn't trust anyone to speak a kind word about my work. Which is odd, considering when I was 13 I shared a few chapters of a novel draft with my mom and a writer friend ... both of whom LOVED the story thus far.

I can't pinpoint when I stopped believing I would ever receive positive feedback. I mean, I was used to criticism in every other part of my life, so why did this suddenly matter?

Maybe I was scared someone would tell me I wasn't good enough to become a writer ... and then I wouldn't write anymore. And I can't imagine what my life would be like now if that had happened.

What it took me all this time to learn is that by finding the right people to share with -- the ones who will support you in all that you do, but will also be honest with you (the balance of positive attitude and constructive feedback) -- your creativity will thrive!

Recently, I got a story published in someone else's book. I received so much congratulations and praise, from people who haven't even read the story yet but who were just proud because they knew how much it meant to me -- a step in a beautiful direction, towards a book of my own being published. One person, however, has nearly ruined it all for me, by putting focus on the wrong aspect. I won't say much more on that, but I will say I realized that this person is NOT in my creative corner.

As Felicia Day says, we have to "surround ourselves with supportive voices who will hold our feet to the fire" ...

“So gather those role models, mentors, and friends.”

Role Models

The first step for gathering your role models is figuring out who you're drawn to ... and WHY? For example: What is it about Kiera Cass and her stories that I absolutely adore and want to emulate? How does Cassandra Clare's ability to world-build inspire me? Why am I enraptured by Sarah J. Maas' characters and writing style?

I also highly look up to Keira Knightley, Natalie Portman, and Blake Lively -- and I can certainly still look to these leading ladies and their film roles for inspiration -- but as a writer, my role models are the published authors who have come before me in young adult literature. These are the people who have already accomplished my dream, showing me that with enough work and the right attitude, I can achieve it too.

Starting in May, for 90 days, I will be reading books relating to my dream novel, for pleasure and to study. I have a book list from my shelves picked out already to draw inspiration from. I'll also be reading an entire series (that I haven't finished yet) from an author whose style I admire.

Mentors

While the role models are those we can study and learn from indirectly, it is handy to have a direct hands-on approach as well. This is where mentors come in. Having an expert, or even someone who is two steps ahead of where we are, can be so valuable to our creative progress. They can really get us moving!

Since it's taken me so long, on my own, to write a novel (making very slow progress), I decided to make an investment in my future as a writer: I joined a 90-day group coaching program specifically for writers to turn their dreams into drafts. (For those interested: the program is created by Caroline Donahue!)

Having this accountability will help keep me to my word that this novel -- after FOURTEEN YEARS -- will finally be written, in 2021.

Friends

I know exactly which friends and family members I will be turning to now, to read my future novel drafts. These are TRUSTED individuals, who I know will be positive yet honest, who I will be able to take critique from with grace.

This doesn't have to just be people in your close circle though -- "friends" could mean a community of other creatives, ones with similar dreams to yours. I'll have access to this in my group coaching program, but there are also a variety of online communities to find your people (maybe there are even local opportunities as well for creative communities).

To Summarize ...

1. Find your role model(s) and study their work, as well as their creative journey (how did they get to where they are now?)

2. Seek out a mentor, one who is at least two steps ahead of you

3. Know which people in your close circle you can trust to share with and/or look for a community of creatives with similar dreams

(Note: This is my fifth article relating to EMBRACE YOUR WEIRD. If you enjoyed this article, please check out my other four: Treat Yourself Like a Research Project; Combatting Creative Enemies; Teach You, Teach Me; and Positive Boredom)