Thanks to my awesome kiddo

Raphy!

YOU are an incredible son, and I'm so proud to be your dad. I'm thankful that you're my kid. I love your sense of humor. I love how you love science and animals and creativity. I love how intelligent and imaginative you are. I love how generous and kind hearted you are. I love how at the age of ten you're a cooler dude than I've ever been!

I love how you embrace your own sense of self, how you're brave enough to have begun to discern the ways in which your path might diverge from the norm. In other words I'm glad that you're thoughtful about doing the right thing, and aware that the right thing is not always the easy or fun thing. I'm glad that you aren't a cookie-cutter kid, following the crowd without thinking whether they're headed in a direction you'd actually like to go.

You have good critical thinking skills, which is rare for adults and especially impressive for a kid your age. AND your critical thinking skills are tempered with constant empathy for people and animals. Your gentleness and sensitivity are some of your greatest qualities, which I hope you always nurture and strengthen.

Gentleness, sensitivity, empathy, critical thinking skills, and bravery are some of the qualities that make a good man, so you're on the right track!

But there's no need to rush. Enjoy your childhood.

Right now you are a great kid. Of course, I'm your dad-- you're bound to expect me to say that.

But other parents and teachers tell me so all the time-- they're impressed by how good a kid you are, especially by your conscientiousness. They say you're always looking out for other kids' safety and that you have a great eye for fairness.

Hearing that kind of compliment from other adults makes me very proud of who you are, but you are the one who deserves the credit. You are who you are! and I hope that YOU love who you are. You should feel good about yourself.

That's not to say you're perfect, nobody is! Every one of us has things to work on, things to grow on, things to do and be better on. But you're a better ten year old than I was in just about every measure I can think of.

Please don't ever stagnate.

I love that you are so honest. You are not afraid to tell the truth. Remember real honesty goes both ways and comes from brave introspection. It's just as important to HEAR the truth as it is to tell it. So keep your thoughts clear and your mind open.

Oh-- I forgot to mention I also love that you love to read! I really enjoyed watching you write your own spooky story last month for school and you show lots of promise as a writer, if that's an art you ever want to pursue.

And there are some superficial things I love about you too. I love your voice, and the sound of your laugh and your cool hair.

I love so many things about you, I'm endlessly thankful that you have so many rare strengths and qualities. Here's my public declaration that I'm glad you are who you are and I'm proud of you. Don't let this all go to your head though. Feel good about who you are, but I must stress: it would be a cruel and vicious prank to play on your old dad if you willfully plateaued at the age of ten, so KEEP GROWING. Just don't rush the growth. Enjoy the journey and the moments.

But that's not really what this thank you letter is about.

No.

There are two things I specifically want to thank you for, things which you have done and are doing, which really impress me beyond words. (I know it's silly to say you impress me beyond words, in a letter full of words, but bear with me.)

I'm actually tearing up at this point, just thinking about these next two things. These aren't tears of sadness, not really. They're tears of comfort, joy, and relief to see you demonstrate these two things, for which I'm endlessly grateful:

1. Thank you FOR BEING SUCH AN AWESOME BIG BROTHER. You really blow me a way. You do. Of all the things I'm thankful for (in my entire life), this currently the very top of my list.

My heart has been bruised more than a few times over the years, but seeing you truly love and care for your precious little bro and sis is healing me, even to the point of restoring some of my hope in humanity.

YOU are always looking out for them. Their safety. Their happiness... Even their fun. My hear swells when play and laugh with them. They look up to you so much, and you're such a shining example and role model. Thanks for being patient, sharing your stuff, your time, and your self with them. They love you, and I'm so glad that they have a person like you to learn from and admire.

2. Thank you for surviving the messiness of your parents's divorce. I went through a similar heartbreak when I was a kid and the hurt stuck with me for years-- it's still there. I never wanted you to feel the pain of your own parents splitting up-- and I'm sorry.

But I'm also glad to see you still thriving and growing and being your wonderful, beautiful self. I'm thankful for the times when you smile despite the heartache-- for your resilience. But as bittersweet that relief may be for me, I need you to know that it's also okay to not be okay sometimes. It's okay to acknowledge the hurt. Everybody hurts. But honest hurt informs us and if we have courage, hurt can heal us into stronger, kinder people.

Thank you for weathering the heartache and not letting it destroy you.

I love you Raphy,

-Dad