Thank You
A Thank You to All Who Have Supported Me
I have been open about how my mother’s death has affected me since it happened in July. I have shown how depressed it has made me, how disoriented it has made, and how, in an odd way, it has made me stronger. Through mostly my poetry and at least one piece of fiction, I have laid my heart bare for everyone to see—and, for the most part, you have all been very receptive to it. You have made me feel accepted and loved in a way that I have not felt from a community in a long time. And for that, I want to tell you all, thank you.
I know that it is not always appealing to read works about something so depressing as death and grief, so to have a creator who keeps producing so many pieces about those subjects can get tedious, to say the least. It can even cause readers to want to stop reading that writer’s works. However, I have found that it really helps me to write these poems and stories, to channel my grief into something creative instead of letting it fester inside of me. It allows me to get the emotions out of me so that I can process them properly when I do not have anyone that I can talk to about them—or when I simply feel as though I cannot talk to anyone about them. If I get a few positive comments or even a Top Story or two out of the process, it’s all the better.
There have been so many of you on here who have really been there for me throughout this entire grieving process just through commenting and giving me encouragement, but one has stood out who has helped me a lot: Paul Stewart. The Accidental Poet has really helped me through the grieving process by sharing his own experiences, and he’s always great for a laugh. I am glad to count him as a friend, as I am glad to count you all as friends.
Make sure to check out Paul’s profile, which I have left a link to below.
Am I done writing grief- and death-related pieces? No, probably not. Even though it has been a few months, I am still going through the grieving process, and I probably will be for quite a while. After all, grief has no deadline. It could take months or even years for me to fully heal. I do not know. Just last night I wrote and posted a poem for the Masks We Wear Challenge that is part of my grieving process (link below).
So, if my readership drops off a bit because I continue to write these pieces, I understand. Hopefully, the quality of my work will prevent that, but I understand that people want variety in their reading and can only emotionally handle so much. It is just what I have to do in order to heal. I just wanted to thank everyone for supporting me when I needed it most and for continuing to support me as I continue to undergo this grieving process and supporting my own father in his grieving process.
That is what I like best about Vocal. We are not just a place to post our writing; we are a community. We are a community of writers, of artists, who support each other not just in our writing endeavors but in every aspect of our lives, even when our lives get ugly. And I hope that we keep supporting each other, no matter what we are going through, no matter what the world is going through—and believe me, it looks like the world is going to go through a lot before things get better (but that’s a story for another article).
About the Creator
Stephanie Hoogstad
With a BA in English and MSc in Creative Writing, writing is my life. I have edited and ghost written for years with some published stories and poems of my own.
Learn more about me: thewritersscrapbin.com
Support my writing: Patreon
Reader insights
Outstanding
Excellent work. Looking forward to reading more!
Top insights
Heartfelt and relatable
The story invoked strong personal emotions
Excellent storytelling
Original narrative & well developed characters
Keep reading
More stories from Stephanie Hoogstad and writers in Humans and other communities.
I Fell in Love with My Best Friend’s Darkest Secret (Part 18)
The night air was electric, tense, as if the city itself held its breath. Liam and I moved cautiously, side by side, every muscle on alert. The park, once a place of comfort and fleeting peace, now felt like a battlefield. Shadows stretched unnaturally, wind whispered secrets, and the lingering feeling of being watched gnawed at me relentlessly.
By Ahmed aldeabella6 days ago in Humans
Comments (20)
You never need to apologize for writing what helps you heal. Grief has no timeline, and your work reflects that truth with honesty and heart.
Another lap with another belated congrats, this time for receiving honourable mention in last weeks leaderboard!!
Loved this Stephanie!! Vocal is definitely a safe space for us to find support, and support each other!! Belated congrats on Top Story!! 🎉
Stephanie, if writing about grief helps, please continue. I understand the feeling of not having anyone to talk to, and writing on Vocal has always helped me. I am sorry for your loss and sending you virtual hugs. Congratulations on your top story and for making this week's leadership board❣
Wooohooooo congratulations on your Leaderboard placement! 🎉💖🎊🎉💖🎊
It’s great to know you can use your talents to process grief. Not everyone has that connection with self to get it out. So, keep writing and posting whatever and whenever because you’re right, grief has no deadline. Sending big hugs and kudos!
Sharing our grief is so loving and I feel like is an extended warm hug to our deep despair. It’s a wonderful thing to process our grief and loss with our art. Hugs and my condolences to you on your deep loss.
Hey Stephanie, first of all, congrats on the Top Story...and a big hug. Grief is never easy to process no matter what form it's in. But we're her when you need friends!
Most poems I share are to do with grief or a trauma that happened in my life. I do write other things too, but there are a lot of things I'm still grieving. The loss of my stepfather and my gran hit me in ways nobody close to me understands, as did everything I went through. I think its great that you are expressing your grief, and thank you for sharing, because another persons grief could be another persons relief.
You know these BIG HUGS are for real. 2025 has been an extremely tough year for my family. Keep writing. You may find that not only is it cathartic for you, but you just might be helping someone else who can relate to those feelings.
Reading this felt like I was inside your mind. Such raw emotons I'm sorry for your loss
I'm very sorry for your loss Stephanie.
wow
Everyone grieves in their own way. As writing helps you, Stephanie, you write your pain away even if it will never go away completely. Hopefully, one day it will just turn into beautiful sadness.
Your openness in sharing your journey through grief is deeply moving, Stephanie. Transforming pain into creative expression not only honors your mother but also helps others feel less alone in their own losses.
I’m very sorry for your loss, Stephanie. Write as many poems about your grief as you need to, it’s yours ♥️
I would like to say before I coment that I liked the piece before I read any reference to myself. You are very welcome. I am glad that I've been able to be any sort of help, even through our chats in the comments sections of our own pieces. I think, despite the vastly different relationships we had with our deceased parents, the fact that it happened this year to both of us and we were both processing it a lot. It helped me a lot, to have someone who knew. Or who knew and it was still very raw. I was glad to reach out, especially when I noticed the frequency of those kinds of poems. I always find it incredibly brave and get more out of poems and writing that comes from real places. It doesn't always have to be doom and gloom realities, but as we live in a pretty messed up world, I think we end up in those dark places. So I was always pleased (wrong word, but hope you know what I mean) that you weren;t really hiding it (it would have been your right to do that, but those poems would not be as so powerful or special if you had held back) I definitely felt better, felt heard when I'd read stuff and think "yes, that's how I feel" and I know you said similar of mine. So have really appreciated that over the last few months. I am sure I mapped out a plan for how I was going to write this comment. But, got distracted a little. lol. Thank you for the shout-out, but really you are welcome and I am glad I, and many others helped you felt connected to the community and felt maybe less alone in your feelings. Also, thank you! I have enjoyed our chats and exchanges. Enjoyed reading more of your work than I had done in the past (what was I thinking?) and also glad that you never take offence easily to my sometimes badly-timed poor taste jokes! ha. Anyway, as for the readership side of things. I would say don't worry about it and do what I do - write about whatever the hell you want - but, I'd understand if that sounds wreckless lol. But, still, you should really just write what feels right to you. Anyway, I have taken up your time way too long, got lost in thought and I am still a little blushy at the shoutout. But, you're always welcome, Stephanie.
I don't think it's tedium that puts people off reading about death, it's fear. It's a part of life for us all, but most of us don't want to talk about it, or even think about it. This leaves us pretty unprepared when people close to us die, and probably not well prepared for our own either. So I say keep churning them out! I write about death a lot. Obliquely, but still. A LOT of my stories have got death in them. I think they tend to be the best ones.
Selah ✌🏾❤️🩹
Oh, hugs, Stephanie. It'll be a year on the 30th since my mother passed away. I know how hard it is for you. A loved one's death is never easy, especially when it's our mama's. After all, she was there when we were born; we never think about life without her. Always feel comforted knowing how much she loved you.