single
Whether you're solitary by choice or simply unlucky in love, being single is complicated.
Surviving Single Life During the Holidays
The holidays are upon us. Meeting with family and gathering around friends and loved ones that are in happy relationships or marriages can enhance the cons and negativity associated with being single. Seeing people that are in happy relationships and viewing couples on dates during the holiday season can do quite a number on your self-esteem and your mindset during the holidays. Don't worry. You aren't in the boat by yourself. Studies have shown that the greatest worry for people around the holiday season is being alone or single.
By Merlin Mystique8 years ago in Humans
The "Single" Love Guru
This may sound crazy and wild but I'm single, single and not sure if ready to mingle. This is my story and possibly the story of many lovely young or old people out there. I have been single for all my life, even through high school, me, a total stunner had no man to lift my spirits. Through college, I really shined my youth and even had admirers but still kept the single status public. But recently now at 23, I had a young friend who's still at her prime teenage years approached me asking for a relationship advice. I was more than thrilled to help and got right into the core of the problem. We discussed texting, crushing and flirting. By the end of it she looked at me with wide-eyed and exclaimed: "Wow, I guess you've been through it all!" HA! funny the problem with that statement was that I'm the least experienced 23-year-old out there. I had managed to do 2 things in this situation, 1. I was able to entertain an 18-year-old with some fake wisdom. 2. I managed to learn something about myself. Despite my lack of experience in a field that everyone seems to win at I knew quite a bit about the world of love and relationships, and why I had not jumped into it. It took me back to the times I watched the relationships around me. Starting with my parents, the place where I should see the most love, I saw it fall apart and be crumpled with the sour words that spewed out of it. Then there were my friends. watching two friends fall deep into an unhealthy relationship and ultimately ending with attempted suicide and restraining orders, I knew the uglies of love existed. As sad and tragic as this sounded I felt fenced about this thought, in a positive outlook I've been saved myself from the heartaches and the crazies. But on the negatives, I've built a wall against men and a potential chance to a long and healthy relationship. Now, this is where things got complicated, two nights ago a male friend of mine confessed his love to me, stating how he had crushed on me for a while. I knew I had to be sensitive and understanding. I let him know that I had goals in life that I had to fulfill and having a significant other would pull me back from those goals. At this point, you're probably wondering why I couldn't give my friend a chance. I mean we're friends for a reason right? There has to be at least a mutual liking to be friends. But the truth is it all came down to the old tale of attraction. I just wasn't attracted to him in that way. As hard as it was to break my friend's heart I had to do what was fair to me and fair to my friend in the long run. Maybe in the future, I might regret not giving my friend a chance but currently, I'm content with my decision. Besides aren't we always taught to love ourselves before loving some else. Maybe that's just something grown-ups have always said to teach us about self-esteem but it doesn't hurt to live by it. So this is where I am, still single and not sure if ready to mingle. I lived this singleness like an identity and despite my feelings of loneliness, I enjoy being single but I also enjoy giving relationship advice. So what? Maybe I am not the most reliable relationship guru and I'll never be a Matthew Hussey the love coach but I can be the single friend that gives it to you as it is, all emotions aside and point blank logic. I'll continue being single but maybe when the right man comes along who knows maybe he'll be strong enough to break my wall, and when it does happen you guys will be the first to know it! Until then I'll keep my Facebook status "Single." Thanks for reading and keep it real. Love, your failed adult, Leels.
By Mellifluous Words8 years ago in Humans
Four Years Starved
It’s not dating that’s hard, it’s meeting people. Think about it. The only reason dating sites exist is because people are too busy, far, or anti-social to meet people. It would be amazing if the world set us up to meet our soulmates at a young age and allowed us to grow with them, but as we all very well know, that is only a reality for some. However, I do think the universe likes to play with us…most often, me.
By Kait Nevin8 years ago in Humans
Loneliness Lacunas
Lacuna (n) - An unfilled space, Gap Loneliness is a strange emotion. Has a friend of yours ever told you they feel lonely? Have you ever told a friend you feel lonely? What was the response that was received to that statement? I bet that it didn’t quite fit as a response, right? As if they didn’t understand what you meant by lonely, but when you try to explain it, you can’t, there doesn’t seem to be any word which quite fits what you intended to say and it’s frustrating.
By Capo Cthulu8 years ago in Humans
I'm Going to Get on Your Every Last Nerve Until You Stop Judging Me
I'm going to get on your every last nerve until you stop judging me and you better believe it. We all go through our day with a million little judgements. The person at the checkout was rude, that girl you work with is a stuck up bitch, the guy sitting next to you on the train smells. The list could go on, but you can save it for the internal monologue. It's not that I'm interested. Mild discrepancy is acceptable, we are only human after all. To judge an entire group of people based on a singular aspect of their lives however, generally falls into one of the "isms." You know those widely unacceptable and quite disgusting notions that cause human beings to generalise and discriminate, you know things like racism or sexism.
By Eve Tawfick8 years ago in Humans
Being Single
Being 41 is not easy. I have gotten to an age where I realize I have wasted a lot of my time; time doing nothing that has gotten me anywhere in life. One of those aspects, where I have wasted, is in the relationship department. Not that I am ashamed at being this age and single without any children. But today, it seems we are defined by our marital status and/or starting a family. Seems like those are the only things that matter in life. That is not true.
By James Roller8 years ago in Humans
Worst Stereotypes About Single Women
Speaking as a relationship writer who has become convinced that modern dating is toxic, I'll be the first to say that staying single is often a person's best bet. Simply put, we can't trust anyone to be the partner we need them to be, in order to make a relationship worth it.
By Ossiana Tepfenhart8 years ago in Humans
The True Feeling of a Teen Heartbreak
I am a nineteen year old girl who is currently experiencing a heart break. Now many people will read this and say, "You don't even know what love is." My question is, who are you to tell me how I feel? My mother would always tell me, "Be the apple at the top of the tree and if someone is worthy enough, they will climb to the top." If you're smart enough, that metaphor will sit very well with you.
By Peaceful Passion8 years ago in Humans
Do I Have to Say Goodbye?
When having to give up the thing that makes you happy because it also causes you pain, it's like digging into your own skin and ripping your heart out of your chest. The thought of having to say goodbye is anxiety ridden thoughts. The heart and mind is racing against your own logic to make you say no. You'd rather deal with the pain and the suffering just to have a few messages sent throughout the week, to have that person be a part of your life in some form. You know it is bad for you, getting the advice from friends saying what you know is the truth. Yet, you still feel stuck between two places, deal with grief after saying goodbye, something that will only last for a short time, or continue with the lasting pain. That person has thoughts and emotions for someone else, you can feel them being happy for their crush. However, despite your crush you have to say goodbye, keeping in contact with them is tearing your soul up. You want them to be happy, but you cannot be there to see their happiness. You tell them the truth of why you are saying goodbye and then remove the conversation, unknowing if they saw the message or not. It's for the best you say, the pain will eventually go away. You want them inside of you, on top of you, holding you more than you want the living sustenance of food and water. Move on, get better, find someone new who is going to reply back to you more than just once or twice a week, who feels the same things for you. One day, hopefully, someone will come along and show you what you deserve in your short life. Although, what if someone doesn't come along, what if loneliness is the only thing that will stay forever? Sure a lot of this loneliness is up to you, but when struck with the anxiety of a million thoughts, all negative, how can one go on?
By R.A. Hudson8 years ago in Humans
You Don't Need No Man (Or Woman)
So I know many of us single or taken see so many couples and romance movies/stories and feel as though there is this “pressure” to be in love or in a relationship. Well, I’m here to squash that idea. As you go through different stages of your life, especially in high school and college, you watch TV series where high school students are focused on trying to get with a guy or trying to get with a girl; because of this, we put so much time and effort into trying to be with someone and fall in love. Since a young age, we are exposed to the realities of how important it is to be in love with someone or have a boyfriend or girlfriend. But these shows don't have much content where the moral of the story is being single or focusing on self-goals. Not only TV series but all media outlets encourage this idea of being in a relationship or being in love, in books, in songs, even magazines where you see new about celebrities, most of the time it is around some subject of love. I myself, have been a victim of this, listening to the lyrics of love songs and wishing that I can find the man of my dreams and be madly in love. Or that Ill go out somewhere and fall in love with someone just from the sight of them across a room. When in reality I was just living in a fantasy world, my expectations of love was unrealistic, and I should have put more time and effort into bettering myself and figuring out what my goals are, and not worry about boys or love.
By Faraji Petty8 years ago in Humans
Crush Being Single
Being single has two sides. To some is a gift, to others, it is a curse. The question is do you see being single as a curse or a gift? There are many things that one can do single that one cannot do while in a relationship. In the following points, I will explain how to crush being single and get the aunt off your back about not being in a relationship.
By Katy Christensen8 years ago in Humans
Why Staying Single Might Be Good for You
I have always been the single friend. The character that you see in movies and television shows, the girl who can never find a boyfriend, never seems to have her act together, often portrayed as the partier, the drinker, the girl who is always coming home in the morning from a one night stand because she can’t get any real dates. Except I’m the single friend who likes it and chooses it.
By Elisa Brooks8 years ago in Humans
