Separating Personal and Professional Life

I have set restrictions on work and social media in my life. It is vital to keep our personal and professional lives separate. I hear stories of people who make the mistake of befriending their co-workers or bosses on social media, only to face the consequences of their personal lives affecting their professional trajectory.

A friend told me about a situation she had when her boss commented on her Facebook post that spread throughout the company. She had befriended her boss on Facebook. As we all do, she posted her trip photos throughout her vacation. Her boss always commented on her posts. During her vacation, she had a fall and her foot swelled up. She posted a photo of her swollen foot, and her boss commented that he did not care how much pain she was in. She had to be at work the next day. Her boss also spread the rumor that she wasn't coming to work, prompting HR to contact her, even though she never mentioned not going to work. After that situation, things did not go well for her at work, and she resigned.

Setting boundaries for social media is just as crucial as doing so for phone calls, texts, and emails outside of working hours. If you're not a police officer, doctor, or on-call essential worker, there's no need for you to be reached after business hours. Just like anyone else, you, too, need a break to unwind and rejuvenate.

When I was an office worker, my boss surprised me by sending a friend request on Facebook. How dare he want to be friends on Facebook? We were not that close at work to have any kind of friendship. I blocked him right away and made sure he couldn't locate me by updating my settings. He never brought it up to me at work and neither did I.

The first text message he sent me after hours was handled with politeness. He asked me to search for a specific email and forward it to him. When I inquired if I should do it during my off hours, he insisted it was a favor. I was furious at the audacity of expecting a work-related task to be done during my personal time. Despite my vexation, I complied, but it was absolutely unacceptable to me.

I realized I had made a significant mistake because it set a precedent, and I was correct. Consequently, when he sent me another text, I replied with, "I'll get back to you as soon as I'm in the office on Monday morning," and left it at that. His reaction? He sent another text and called me, but I chose not to respond or answer the call. A favor was becoming an obligation, and I was not going to have it.

When I arrived at the office on Monday morning, he was already there. I greeted him politely, sat at my desk, and read his text message. I was a bookkeeper, and his request involved me logging into the business bank account to search for a specific cleared check. So, I did as he asked and replied to him. I sensed he was somewhat dismissive, but I didn't let it bother me. My private life deserves as much respect as his.

After a short period, he realized his mistake and apologized for encroaching on my personal time. He assured me it would not happen again. However, a few weeks later, he sent a text message that said, "When you read this on Monday morning at work, could you please print out the reports I emailed you?" And just as his text message implied, I did not read it until Monday morning.

I've come to understand the importance of setting boundaries. Regardless of my fondness for my boss or colleagues, maintaining a distinction between my personal and professional life has proven to be highly beneficial. For your own sanity, I suggest you do the same.

Originally published in Newsbreak on September 16, 2024