Rose's Romance

When Rose opened her mailbox at her new apartment, she was surprised it was already packed with mail. All her bills transferred over, even junk mail found a way to her. But the orange pamphlet made no sense. There was no return address, just her first name written neatly in cursive.

When Rose opened it, she first thought the money was fake. She counted it six times, every time it came back to $20,000. She debated every option, wondering if she should call her parents, her closest friend, or even the police. Finally, she decided to bury it at the bottom of her closet and tried best to live her life unaware of her emergency stash. She continued to work a time-consuming remote marketing job during the day, one she got on her own, and always prided herself on being independent.

She believed the money came from a secret admirer, it had to. Even when she was younger, Rose was no stranger to having a secret or not so "secret" admirer. She didn’t even think she was the prettiest girl, but she knew there was something magnetic about her. She had been offered grandiose gestures, gifts and compliments since her very first date. Yet because she held herself to a high standard, she also held anyone who tried to enter her life romantically to a high standard. Her vigilance extended to other aspects of her life, and that's how she felt about the cash.

While Rose wasn't religious, she did carry an aura of superstition. She reasoned what she recieved must be some kind of divine or cosmic placing, ultimately a treasure was meant to be protected, especially until she knew what to do with the sum. Knowing this cash existed for her to use, if need be, greatly reassured her, in case she were to lose her job and while she still tried to continue to live frugally, she did treat herself when it came to Andres’s café.

While there was a pragmatic side to Rose, there was also a dreamy, bohemian side. There was something about entering Andres's mom and pop style shop, that felt pleasant and homey. She loved the smell of coffee brewing, hearing the espresso machine make all kinds of noises, the busyiness of it all and the quality ingredients and products. It reminded her of backpacking days during her study-abroad semester in college, no matter what city in the world she visited, she would always stop by a local cafe and people watch. Sonder. It grounded her where ever she went.

Rose was such a regular at Andres’s café that he always kept her favorite items in stock. He memorized her “light iced matcha latte with oat milk and a slice of poppy seed cake” order the way he memorized other things about her… how her wide eyes meant she was genuinely surprised or how she would smile even if she had something negative to say, as if trying to offset the negativity. Since the first time they met, she always made conversation with him as if he was an old friend. If he stared one second too long into her eyes, he could feel her peer into his soul, the no way nobody had before. Especially nobody as attractive as her.

Yet, for all her beauty, and kindness, Rose was struggling when it came to love. Andres knew it all too well. He would often pretend to busy himself cleaning behind the counter or organize his café’s inventory, when Rose would sit at her favorite spot, catch the late afternoon sun and occasionally chat with a friend about how hard it was to “find the one.”

The most challenging part for him was when she brought in dates. Sometimes he felt jealous and tried to understand what interested her about each one. He lost track because there were so many different ones, but never the same one again. Except for one. Jeremy.

“When are you going to get over Jeremy?” The concerned look on Angela, Rose’s best friend was tinged with annoyance. Rose sipped her beverage slowly, trying to come up with a good answer.

The thing is Rose wanted to be over Jeremy, like really badly, as Angela would say. But Jeremy had other plans. Just when Rose thought she would never hear from Jeremy again, he would call her and take her out on an incredible date. Dinner at a trendy new restaurant, lunch in a quaint neighborhood, walking on the beach at sunset. But then, she wouldn’t hear from him for another two to three weeks. Sometimes a month or longer.

“I’m not going to let this go on forever. I’m going to talk to him. Soon.” Rose barely said the last word but Andres heard it. The whole situation confused him. He disliked Jeremy, the guy was born with a silver spoon and appeared smooth in front of Rose, even tipped Andres generously, but Andres could tell it was all an act. Poor Rose, struggling to take off her rose-colored glasses.

Her demeanor was different around Jeremy. She was quieter and more hesitant, as if one wrong word would alarm him. She deserved better, someone like him… except well, Andres wasn’t wealthy like Jeremy, and if he made the wrong move, she might not visit him again.

But he was surprised when he saw her walk in the next morning, earlier than her usual time with a little black Moleskine notebook in her hand. She wanted her beverage warm this time. He focused on steaming the oat milk, and then pouring it over… carefully designing a heart, like he usually did. When Rose sat in her typical spot, there was something different about her energy this time. She took out her notebook and scribbled quickly. She closed it shut, just as Jeremy arrived, grumbling about his sports car almost getting scratched but trying to appear cool.

“What’s up Rosie?” Jeremy reached over to kiss her on the cheek and then sat down. He made brief eye contact with a waitress next door but yawned loudly, hoping Rose would not notice his nerves.

All Rose wanted to do was tousle his hair or hold his hand. She felt this brick wall growing between them, no matter what she said or did. Yet the chemistry she felt with Jeremy was indescribable. He made her feel loved and understood in a way that her family or friends were unable to do so. Even ex-boyfriends. But she had to be strong now, she was tired of his indecisiveness towards her. She was also nervous about getting her heart broken again and another sleepless night.

She reached her hand across the table, a spark igniting both of them over her notebook. Chemistry upon poetry. Rose was afraid to proceed, but she had to get this over with.

“Do you want to consistently keep seeing me?”

A stillness in the air followed her question, paralleled between Jeremy’s silence and Andres’s hopefulness. Andres watched Jeremy stiffen, surprisingly feeling sorry for him for the first time.

Rose watched his hand pull away, a sense of loss overcoming her. His words didn’t matter to her anymore. She finally saw how his actions, all the times he flaked or made promises he couldn’t keep outweighed the positives. A feeling that was both heavy and light swayed in her heart. Better to walk away from being unappreciated than being hopeful someone will change. It stung but it was time to let him go and free herself.

“I’m sorry, Rose.”

Rose’s daze was interrupted by Andres handing her napkins. She didn’t realize how long she had been sitting after Jeremy had walked away. Rose blew her nose into the napkin. Although she was no longer crying, her face still felt fresh from the tears. Andres placed a freshly toasted slice of poppy seed cake and a matcha latte on her table. He sat down next to her, for the first time in almost a year.

“It’s on the house,” he smiles.

“Andres, you’re so sweet. Thank you,” Rose savors the cake. “You must think so many things are wrong with me.”

“I don’t think there’s anything wrong with you,” he responded, his hand accidentally brushing against hers. They both feel a spark for each other, it continues as Andres holds her hand.

“I think we should share something with the other, that the other person doesn’t know. Let's write it out, like a word game. We each try to add something different or more exciting than the sentence before,” Rose shares. She opens a new entry in her Moleskine notebook. “I’ll start…”