Negotiation, Like a Game of Chess. Are You Ready?

Good negotiators manage to conclude a negotiation so that each party involved feels that they have made a good "deal" and has a positive feeling.

We can learn the most from the negotiators around us and to do this it is important to start to be aware of the moments of negotiation and the reasons why we make certain choices, both in business and in personal life.

An example of skilled negotiators is children, and I invite you to follow closely the techniques you use to persuade you to make certain decisions.

What is negotiation

Negotiation is a process in which there are at least two parties who want to achieve a goal and do so by reaching an agreement on which they agree and which they support.

In practice, this process is illustrated every day of our lives in situations such as: when we negotiate with our life partner where to go out when we negotiate with children about the toys they want when we try to find reasons in front of suppliers to get a lower price or when we develop elaborate arguments to convince a potential customer of the benefits of the products we offer.

Not all of us are made for negotiation. But we can learn it

Surely negotiation is a skill that can be developed, but just as after two hours of driving school you can't say you've become a good driver, so after a few attempts to apply negotiation techniques in a meeting you can't say that you have become a good negotiator.

It is a skill that, like any other, can be developed and perfected through training. Of course, some people are helped by native talent, but I think anyone can become a skilled negotiator if they are prepared for it.

Negotiation is a game of chess

It is important in a negotiation to anticipate the next moves. First of all, it matters a lot how you prepare a negotiation and set minimum and maximum goals for each element that can be negotiated, so as not to be taken by surprise.

Also, sometimes we tend to take into account only the negotiator we are talking to, when in fact there is often an entire interest group that decides the solution be adopted. It is essential to identify the influencing factors and how we can convince them to opt for the option we propose.

I think it is essential for entrepreneurs to express their proposals emphasizing the benefits of the negotiating partner if they respond positively to the request made and also not to hide the small weaknesses that it is obvious that the interlocutor has noticed or will find out from another part.

It is proof of strength and credibility to be able to present a small weak point just to make the key arguments shine. For example, if you represent an entrepreneurial company and compete with a multinational company, the negotiating partner certainly knows this.

Instead of this element being a weakness, you can turn it into extra credibility, being the one who brings it into question, such as: "I know you have offers from companies with a larger team and tradition "But because I am not a multinational, I can offer you something extra: more time for consulting, flexibility, speed in communication and a customized solution specific to the Romanian market".

Negotiation. Risks and benefits

Negotiation happens naturally for the world to reach an agreement, and if we realize this we have only to gain because we will better prepare our arguments and actions. There are cultures, such as the Arab or Turkish, in which the art of negotiation is recognized and is part of the behavioral habits of the majority of the population.

In Romania, negotiation is more accepted in the business environment, in many other aspects of life Romanians are quite reluctant to negotiate.

I think this is both a consequence of the long period of communism when trade was banned and the lack of training in persuasion, argumentation, and debate in schools. In the absence of this training, people feel uncomfortable when negotiating, fear a possible refusal, and end up adopting solutions that are not suitable for either party.

The secret is the art of negotiation

A negotiator needs to take into account the emotional factors that influence the decision and not just the technical aspects. An emotional factor can shatter a thousand rational arguments.

The fact that your best friend tells you not to buy from one supplier and to choose another may weigh more than the 3 meetings in which another conscientious negotiator convincingly presented his solution.

Also, a negotiator should keep in mind that not only the words convey a message, but also the expressions, gestures, inflections of the voice, the way we dress, or the way we sit at the negotiating table.

How to become a winner

I don't think there is a universal recipe. Always in Brightway negotiation training, we offer negotiation tools, which can be customized according to the situation. Experience, continuous training play an essential role in the success rate of a negotiator.

What makes you a loser in negotiations

There is no standard profile of a loser. What we can observe, however, is that negotiation involves the assertive transmission of a message to produce a certain impact on the interlocutor.

If a person lacks communication skills, persuasion, the ability to control emotions, or patience, it will certainly be quite difficult for him to succeed in a negotiation. Just like in a poker game, where you can win a hand by playing bluff - at certain points in the negotiation, appearances are just as important as substance.