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Moods of a Complicated...ME!

Rick's Self-appreciation challenge. x10

By Antoni De'LeonPublished 8 months ago 3 min read

𐀪1.

Find me in dark and shadow, in between the light. Burning brighthot...or in flames waning in the wind. I inherited my Great-Gran's fiery Indian temper** Tempered by my African Gran's quiet, but deadly charm.

Sometimes, I feel the B𐀪𐀪ch inside me trying to escape...some days I let her out. Be wary of her then. A Black Woman, comfortable in her own skin...quirky, weird, misunderstood and unique. The one of me is still arriving. She won't be perfect...that's ok.

𐀪𐀪2.

I can stand in awe of a radiant sunset...or curse in irreverent benediction at the morning's dawn of a majestic sunrise. I am either having a good day or a bad day...Depending!

The dew winks on the petals of the flowers...I stare up at the sky, wondering where the heck I fit in.

The grass pays homage to the rising sun...I wonder where the hell are my sneakers...I want to catch the first morning rays.

Birds cheep a grateful 'good morning', as they smile at the dawn of a new and glorious day...I run...and run...as if the Devil himself is chasing me.

I cannot let him catch me. I've got lots more to do.

I am in tune with nature. If people allow it, I can also be in tune with them.

𐀪 𐀪 𐀪 3.

I am introverted...Seeing and feeling on a deeper level of consciousness. Poetic, connected to nature, the world my oyster.

I crave peace and silence...friendship only of a few genuine souls. Self-ish-ness in not always a negative term. I tend to avoid people, even though I embody the capacity to deeply understand and share in the emotions of others. I foster strong connections whenever the occasion necessitates.

𐀪 𐀪𐀪𐀪4.

I appreciate family (adore the siblings) near and far, those who tolerate me and I them.

It is futile to expect family or world peace. I have to make my own version of it, even when that ole serpent intervenes.

𐀪𐀪 𐀪𐀪𐀪5.

I appreciate that I am adaptable, resilient and flexible, expecting nothing, appreciating life's gifts.

Boredom visits me, I will bounce all over the place, unable to focus. I won't be on the Leaderboard for reading the most stories (maybe) I start reading stories, inspiration dawns, and off I go to write another story. I read in starts and bursts...Focus...focus!

𐀪 𐀪𐀪 𐀪𐀪𐀪6.

I believe in my extraordinary ability to imagine scenarios, create fictional worlds, and express myself in unique ways. Who cares if I am not the best at it...the green-eyed-monster rears its head from time to time. Maybe I do wish to be the best...sometimes......I enjoy the freedom to make of myself what I will.

𐀪𐀪𐀪 𐀪 𐀪𐀪𐀪7.

I have a ton of passably chic clothes, yet I keep wearing the same old raggedy ones...pajamas and baggy pants, sometimes I wear em outside as well...I have Einstein hair, it refuses to be 'ruly'...se la vie...My room is not neat at all, good thing I am the only one who uses it. Books, art supplies, hobby this and that and all kinds of knick-knacks are everywhere. I keep tidying it, but it goes right back. 😊

I love my messy personality, it breeds creativity. Not to worry, there are days when I absolutely have to tidy up and be as neat as can be. It does not last very long.

𐀪𐀪𐀪𐀪𐀪 𐀪𐀪𐀪8.

I love to eat...eat...and eat. I cook, but chef so and so would be ashamed of me. I have OCD, I wash my hands a million times per day...annoying everyone asking them to wash their hands...a lot. You would think that I would be a neat freak...right! 😊Soooo not Monk...You know...The TV series.

𐀪𐀪 𐀪𐀪𐀪𐀪 𐀪𐀪𐀪9.

I embrace/hate my suspicion of social media, scary places, confusing and threatening, like ghosts waiting to pounce. Weird, I did say that I am weird. I will make an effort to get on the Vocal networking on the WWW...Sigh! Discord...I see a maze...what do you see? I desire to write, so I understand that getting over this dread is to my benefit.

Luck be a lady!

𐀪𐀪𐀪 𐀪𐀪𐀪𐀪 𐀪𐀪𐀪10.

In the education department, I am still circumnavigating my life choices, maybe I will travel the world and study online, take a few in-classroom courses along the way...Take Novel's advice and live, instead of spending my time making a living. Do odd jobs to finance my escapades, help build Habitat for Humanity along the way. Live like a part time hobo/hippie/wanderer. My choices are wide open.

Finally, I do not yet have profound and lofty ruminations about my kooky life. There is still a lot of appreciating of myself left to imagine. Ask me again in five years. There will be so much to rave and swagger about. 😊Lots of I's in this story.

........😊

Rick's prompt.

humanityhumorStream of Consciousness

About the Creator

Antoni De'Leon

Everything has its wonders, even darkness and silence, and I learn, whatever state I may be in, therein to be content. (Helen Keller).

Tiffany, Dhar, JBaz, Rommie, Grz, Paul, Mike, Sid, NA, Michelle L, Caitlin, Sarah P. List unfinished.

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  • Marilyn Glover8 months ago

    Antoni, I love your entry and see a kindred spirit in you. This line stuck out: "I am in tune with nature. If people allow it, I can also be in tune with them." Einstein hair, love it; my son has Einstein hair, too!

  • Thank you for your entry, Antoni!

  • Rohitha Lanka8 months ago

    Fabulous!!!

  • C. Rommial Butler8 months ago

    Well-wrought, Antoni! Sometimes the devil chases us just to get us moving. Then he can relax for awhile and drink a nice hot cup of tea with God and cuss about how good we're doing while secretly cheering us on. He's a weird fellow too, obviously. And he works a lot, as one might expect, given the current state of the world! Maybe he's due for retirement...

  • Novel Allen8 months ago

    This is different, it is a soul searching prompt. I love your approach. Fresh and kind of out there freeing. I am scribbling one, it goes. Love the poetic vibes.

  • Omgggg, I loveeeeee to eat too. But I only know how to eat, not cook. Lol. Reading this made me realise that we have a lot in common hehehe

  • JBaz8 months ago

    I am working on this challenge and find it ...well challenging. You did a great job of picking 10 things and you explained each one. It is great seeing this side of you.

  • You are a person with profundity, Antoni, and it's perfectly to be messy--yes, it breeds creativity! We like who you are.

  • Nikita Angel8 months ago

    Wonderful 👍

  • You sound like a fun person to be around, Antoni! I love your self-descriptions & laid back analysis.

  • ✍️ Your WordArt & Self-Awareness are beautiful! ✍️

  • Mark Graham8 months ago

    Good job on this one. I too have a nook full of books, notebooks and crafts that need to be completed. We are who we are.

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