Join the Irish ‘Hello!’ Club

I was born in Northern Ireland in 1972. Growing up, I witnessed many atrocities carried out through acts of sectarian violence. This tumultuous time period was known broadly as 'The Troubles.'

It is likely a minor miracle that I am writing this now. During my youth I was only a moments away from a bomb that destroyed my home town of Bangor. Not just once in fact, but on two separate occasions. (talk about ‘Luck O’ the Irish!')

The thing about Northern Ireland however, is that no matter how bad things would get, the ordinary folk would continue to go about their daily business in the most joyous and passionately friendly way you can imagine ...

When I was a child for example, shopping in town with my mum would always take forever. This was because of the multitude of people she would say ‘hello’ to on the way and strike up a conversation with. I would try my best to tug her away, only for it to happen again within just a few yards.

The thing is, for the most part my mum didn’t have clue who these people were and they didn’t know her either. But if you stood and watched them, it was as though they had known one another for years.

As I got older, it became apparent that I had picked up the same friendly trait as my mum. Anywhere and everywhere I would go in Ireland, I would say ‘bout ye’ to complete strangers (that’s Belfast speak for ‘hello!' by the way) and then conversations would develop. I made some very close friends this way.

Then at the age of 25 I found myself struggling to find work. Some of my friends had moved to England and seemed to be finding employment at the drop of a hat. So I decided to give it a whirl and join them. But there was one thing they didn’t warn me about …

When I first arrived, I set off into the town to visit the job agency. On my merry way, I began my usual tirade of greeting complete strangers …

"Bout ye!"

Nothing …

"What about ye!"

Still nothing!

Some people were looking at me as though I was a complete lunatic. Some looked as though they might even punch me in the face. One woman glared at me, like I was some kind of pervert (I’m not by the way!) then crossed to the other side of the street in fear for her life.

I spoke to my friends later …

"What the hell is going on here? Why is no one answering my 'bout ye's?"

"Oh, they don’t really do that here. I’m quite surprised you didn’t get a smack in the mouth," my friend chuckled.

I've been in England for over twenty five years now, and in all this time I can almost count on one hand how many strangers have said hello back to me in the street. And I’ve only got three fingers. (Sorry, I'm kidding. Just some Irish wit there!)

But in all seriousness, I think this is really sad. It shows how our societies are losing any sense of community spirit while becoming more focussed on the self. Not only is this bad for our mental wellbeing, but it also helps to feed the divisions that are so very prominent in this strange modern world.

So, please. If you live somewhere that is not like my lovely homeland of Northern Ireland where strangers say hello. Give it a whirl and see what occurs. You may find a friend for life!

"Bout ye!"

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Original version published at https://medium.com/never-stop-writing/join-the-irish-hello-club-51707e664a02