How to Keep Your Relationship Exciting

Relationships can be tough, no matter how much you love each other. In the beginning, everything feels new and exciting. You fall for each other, make promises, and enjoy those special moments. But as time goes on, life can get in the way. Bills, work, and everyday responsibilities can start to wear down the spark you once had.

It’s not that you don’t love your partner anymore, but when you find yourselves arguing about who forgot to take out the trash or sitting in silence on a Saturday night, it’s easy to wonder where the fun went. It might even hit you that it’s been days—or even weeks—since you shared an intimate moment, and frustrations are starting to build.

I'm not a relationship expert, but over the years, I've been in several relationships, ranging from short flings to long-term partnerships. Some of these relationships lasted years, while others were brief and left little more than memories. Through all of these, I’ve learned a few tricks for keeping things fresh when the routine starts to get stale.

If you’re looking for ways to spice things up, here are a few ideas that have worked for me—though I’ll be honest, not all of them were perfect solutions!

1. Plan a Gym Date

Even if you don’t work out together, planning a gym date can be a fun way to stay connected. It doesn’t always have to be about fitness—just setting a regular time to meet there gives you something to look forward to together. Plus, it gives you something to talk about afterward. Whether you're laughing at the guy showing off in the weight room or trying a new workout class together, it’s an easy way to break up the usual routine. If your gym has a sauna, why not unwind together afterward? You can enjoy the heat while sharing a quiet moment or maybe even get a little flirty.

2. Play Games Together

When was the last time you and your partner played something together for fun? Games are a great way to bond and keep things lighthearted. I recently visited my parents, and each morning they sit down to do the crossword puzzle together. They debate the answers, share ideas, and enjoy the challenge as a team. It’s not just about winning—it’s about spending quality time together. My sister and her husband have a habit of playing Scrabble when they have a free moment, even if it’s just between errands or while the kids run off to the playground. Find a game you both enjoy, whether it’s a board game, a card game, or even something on your phone. It’s a simple way to reconnect, even if you only have a few minutes.

3. Add Some Friendly Competition

Everyone loves a little healthy competition, so why not make your own version of a cooking show at home? You and your partner can cook one night, and your friends or neighbors can cook another. Then, everyone can score each other’s dishes. Don’t worry about winning—it’s about having fun together. Whether it’s a cook-off, a bake-off, or any other fun challenge, a little competition can shake things up and add excitement to your routine. The best part? You get to enjoy delicious food with your partner and friends.

4. Learn a New Language

If you’re feeling adventurous, learning a new language together can be a great way to bond. I’ve tried both Spanish and French lessons in past relationships. While neither of those languages saved my relationships, they did help me learn a new skill and gave me something to share with my partner. Plus, when you travel, having basic knowledge of another language can be really useful. Whether you’re learning for fun or planning a future vacation, learning together can help strengthen your connection.

5. Spice Things Up in the Bedroom

Let’s face it—keeping the physical side of your relationship exciting is just as important as the emotional side. Have an open conversation with your partner about what you both like, what you want to try, and how you can keep things fresh. You could experiment with something new, like trying outdoor sex or exploring a threesome—whatever feels right for you both. The key is not letting other people’s rules or expectations define your relationship. You and your partner know what makes you feel good, so go for it.

6. Don’t Give Up

No relationship is perfect, and there’s no magic formula to making it last forever. The most important thing is to keep working at it. Relationships take time, patience, and a willingness to try new things. If one idea doesn’t work, don’t give up—try something else. Relationships go through ups and downs, and it’s normal to feel frustrated sometimes. But if you care enough, you’ll put in the effort. And if you feel like it’s time to move on, that’s okay too. Not every relationship is meant to last forever, and sometimes the best thing you can do for yourself is to walk away when it’s no longer working.

Final Thoughts

Relationships aren’t always easy, but that doesn’t mean they have to feel boring or stagnant. By keeping things fresh and making an effort to try new things together, you can keep your connection strong. Whether it’s through a new hobby, some friendly competition, or spicing things up in the bedroom, there are plenty of ways to keep your relationship exciting. The most important thing is to keep communicating, keep connecting, and never stop putting in the effort.