Ghosted After Quarterly Review

Three months, I'd say that's a success story as far as dating goes. If you're seeing someone consistently for three months, that means you like each other on some level.

I'm at work and I grab lunch with a co-worker and she proceeds to tell me the story of a guy she recently dated that ghosted her. I assumed she meant they spoke a few days, maybe went out once or twice and then he ghosted her but no they dated for three months and saw each other at least twice a week. My initial reaction was 'oh well that's odd'. I would expect someone I'm seeing for even a month twice a week to respectfully share they're not feeling it and want to cut things off.

On the last date they had, they went to dinner had a nice time. Just the usual date but after they had, what she explained, as a passionate amazing kiss. One of those kisses that can change the course of the relationship, maybe move things forward swiftly. She went home and thought to herself 'wow that was amazing maybe I'm in love'.

Well he never contacted her again. She sat in agony day to day checking her phone waiting for him to contact her. It never came and after a few weeks she couldn't take it anymore and texted. My reaction while taking a bite out of my pizza was 'oh geez you shouldn't have reached out. Nothing good comes out of reaching out to a guy that hasn't bothered to contact you'. She said she texted him 'hey wanted to make sure everything is ok I haven't heard from you' and his response was very non-chalant 'hi I've been busy how are you'. She was immediately fuming feeling dumb for reaching out as he casually acted like it was no big deal. The texting conversation fizzled and she never heard from him again.

Fast forward eight months later, co-worker is getting on a plane to go to a wedding. As she approaches her seat she sees 'the ghoster' in the seat that is right next to her assigned seat. She proceeds to sit down and explains to me that they didn't make eye contact not even once and neither of them said hello. She thought he was probably going home to visit family since the country they were flying into was where he was from. I'm sitting there wondering how is that possible! How do you sit next to and share shoulder and air space and not even say 'hey'. She said when she sat down, she could see from her peripheral vision that his eyes were freaking out and he didn't know what to do. They proceeded the entire flight without acknowledging each other. They walked off the plane without acknowledging each other and never spoke again. I was dumbfounded cracking up at the thought of this.

That would never happen to me. I would have said hey in the happiest voice and asked if the cat gave him his tongue back since he had lost it eight months ago, but that's me and my sarcastic humor. At the very least, I would've said 'hey' just to not make it awkward for the rest of the flight.

Could you have sat right next to, readjusted in your seat, not looked to the side and just ignored someone you dated for three months on a plane? I for certain could never just out of pure nerves and I would've wanted to take the opportunity to make him feel uncomfortable :)

My co-worker did say they hadn't been intimate as she was dating intentionally and didn't want to be ghosted and feeling worse so I don't know if maybe that played into his reaction. Maybe he didn't want to wait anymore or maybe he thought she wasn't that into him? It's probably good they weren't intimate so she wasn't more hurt then necessary because a guy that won't wait and it capable of that ghosting behavior is not worth it.

Have you ever been ghosted after dating for a solid few months? What was your reaction?

Happy Dating!

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