Final Decision

I am Princess Sayako and today I will be Empress Sayako of Japan, as I reflected in the gold framed mirror. The secret is how to live beside with someone you love. That’s what I’ve learned in fantasy books. Love was never a topic to discuss or mentioned in our family. Arranged marriages have been around for centuries.

My parents knew they had to prepare for a suitor when I turned eighteen. All of the education they provided for me was essential in ensuring that I would be a good wife, an honourable empress, and that any emotional expression I had would be silenced. I was never permitted to express my emotions. Law and order were important and it had kept our country in order for centuries. This is a tradition in my family. I don't see my mother and father very often that they are so busy. Perhaps this is how my life will turn out to be.

We rarely talk about our days during our family lunches and dinners. Perhaps having servants in the room has made things more difficult. My father used to spend more time with me when I was younger; now, more than ever, he is completely dedicated to his work, solely focused on making this country a better place. My loving mother would try to pay attention to me whenever she could, but it's difficult when she has to accompany my father on business trips.

I remembered the words of my mother six months ago, "Sayako, we have identified the ideal suitor for you. He’s going to run the country and look after our people; you're going to be Empress soon, and we need to prepare the ceremony. The charming man was raised by another royal blood line. The Prince has studied abroad, served as a leader, and helped his father in political and charitable endeavours. He’s going to give you everything you need in your life: including children, money, and stability." My family understands what is best for both me and the country. The country requires an Emperor, who serves as a symbol of the state and people's unity. In the Head of the Inner Palace, I have decision-making power. Furthermore, my role is critical, as it is for my mother, to attend official duties alongside my Emperor, improve the lives of public workers, build strong allies in the government, and improve education. My mission has always been to organise charitable events to help the homeless and refugees in displaced communities.

Silence spreads like a shadow across my room. My cherry lips had turned pear-shaped, and as my nose wrinkled, I let out a low whimper.

I took a deep breath and sighed in resignation as the break of dawn heralds my new life. Layers of red and gold brocade and the obi tightly wrapped around my disguised figure. Pearly white powder coated my heart-shaped face. My ebony beehive hair, adorned with golden floral embellishments, enhanced my dark eyes and my brows were sculpted by a black eyebrow pencil.

“Today is a happy day.” I said to myself with a forced smile. I've been practising my smile since sunrise, having been tossed around by the servants like a rag doll for this auspicious occasion.

The wind hissed through the crevasse of the window and brushed my skin as my eyes gazed into the Zen garden for the last time. I enjoyed watching the petals dance in the air as if they were two ballerinas in Swan Lake. The sakura fragrance filled the air, and the growing volume of the cymbal assembly, the piercing of the string quartets, the dark timbre gong and the drum attack began to harmonise. A voice over the loudspeaker said, "Princess Sayako and Prince Kokaku are pleased to announce their wedding today at 12 o’clock in the evening, Himeji Castle Chapel. Following a festive reception to be held at Himeji Central Park.”

“Why?” A shaky breath is exhaled. Through the window, the instruments are becoming increasingly louder.

Is my new Emperor going to be like...Saul? My body sank deeper into my chair.

On Saul's first day, two years ago, the Warden showed him around and introduced us in the garden. His hazel eyes with a radiant strike of inner gold, and his smile shone like a beam of sunlight. He was tasked with creating a family mural for our castle. I showed him around the palace that day, and he told me about his life in Spain while painting portraits of me and beautiful landscapes that captured our time in history. We managed to flee in secret over the next few days. We danced through the fields and swam in the river under the golden sun, which I felt liberated. We continued to sit beneath the infinite sky, where the sun and moon meet, watching the sun set over the horizon and sharing our dreams. When we walked into town, he would buy food rather than a banquet, we sit around a fire place talking more about his adventures and poems that soothed my heart. I realised then that none of my material possessions are valuable or provided me with pleasure.

We spent a lot of time together for a year, and then he vanished.

A year has gone by. Time had passed quickly.

My eyes drooping from the thought that I couldn’t see him again.

This memory needs to be pushed out of my mind. It is forbidden. My parents are extremely strict when it comes to me. It is forbidden to marry a commoner, especially who is not from my culture. I pressed my fingers against my heart in hope to stop the tears from forming.

Tappity, Tap, Tap!

Who's that in the window? I said in a startled voice.

"Oh, it's Yuzuna” glancing in the mirror, I quickly fixed my makeup.

"Come in." Waving at her through the window.

"Princess Sayako, there is a gift for you." My trusted court lady, Yuzuna, closes the door behind her.

“What do you have for me?”

"A thoughtful gift from someone special." Whispered Yuzuna.

Yuzuna gently handed the present to me, and as I examined it, I instantly recognised the floral silk printed fabric. On the carved mahogany table beside us, I unwrapped the present. The piece is surrounded by freshly picked yellow flowers. Twenty thousand dollars, a little black book, and there it was my boxwood comb with my "S.K." initials etched on it.

"Why has it returned to me?" I whispered to myself. Yuzuna stood there silently, waiting for further instructions.

I turned over the front cover, and the characters were in black calligraphy.

"My dearest Sakura,

Come to Spain with me. I'll show you all the places we've dreamed

about.

Meet me at noon on the East side of the red bridge.

Saul."

I read through the next few pages quickly, and then I closed the book. My fingertips lovingly caressed the front cover as if it were his tender face and then embraced the book firmly in my arms, with the tears rolling down my cheeks and onto the pages like the rainstorm pitter pattering on a stone. His heart was imprinted on the pages, and he kept memories of us.

My lungs drew a deep breath, my nose pressed against the fabric, and I instinctively remembered his musky scent, and my body rose.

"Please forgive me," I muttered to myself.

I spun to Yuzuna with a hurried voice, "Prepare my horse!"