Disney and its unrealistic portrayal of romantic relationships.

ONCE UPON A TIME...Disney set a lot of young and impressionable girls up to fail in future relationships because of its incredibly high, unrealistic, and most importantly ‘magical’ expectations that it used to portray romance and love.

When I reached the age of dating and first discovered how difficult relationships were, it almost made me not want to have one. I had become so invested in these whimsical fairy tales as a child that I actually believed that I needed a man to come and save me (how sad). As time has moved on into the world of feminism and equal rights some of the older and seemingly more outdated Disney films can be seen as quite controversial now. For example, my favourite childhood Disney was (and still is) Beauty and the Beast. Belle could be considered as one of the more independent and standalone Disney princesses until like the others she succumbs to the thrill of the damsel in distress. These women always start off as independent and focused at the beginning of the movie and in the end are shown having to make some kind of sacrifice so they can be with their prince.

Understandably a young and curious little girl will find this hard not to fantasise about. Of course, Disney sells us an untouchable dream, however, this is not something that is fully understood as a child. Fast forward to the present day and we have so many Disney films that now represent females as strong, determined, and goal-oriented without having to compromise their dreams for love. Take, for example, Moana which focuses heavily on family lineage and love in a community as opposed to a romantic love which is a beautiful comparison to the much older cliches.

Many of the women in these tall tales are shown as not having much choice when it comes to picking their ‘happily ever after’. It’s often the first man to stumble onto the scene that becomes their object of desire. They don’t have the trial and error of the modern-day dating experiences that women seem to endure nowadays. Most women are looking for their happily ever after whether they believe in it or not and unfortunately it is not always as easy as the movies insist. In hindsight who wants to settle down with the first person they meet? Unless it’s a childhood sweetheart or a miraculous perfect match, different relationships teach us different lessons not only about ourselves but what we are ideally looking for in another person. Can we truly believe that Cinderella and Prince Charming are still living happily ever after together with 3 kids and an expensive mortgage on that enchanted castle? I’d like to think so, however realistically this isn’t the way it happens for the modern-day woman.

Since the time of the women’s rights movement, women have found more and more reasons not to ‘settle’ and not to judge their successes by their marital status and instead have found their voices and know their rights. Interestingly enough, according to linguists Carmen Fought and Karen Eisenhauer, in a recent study they analysed dialogue in Disney movies and relating to The Washington Post, they discovered that “all of the princess movies from 1989-1999 — Disney’s ‘Renaissance’ era — are startlingly male-dominated. Men speak 71% of the time in Beauty and the Beast (1991); 90% of the time in Aladdin (1992) 76% of the time in Pocahontas (1995).” This research supports the fact that in the ’90s the female characters speak the least in Disney movies and therefore were not seen as equals and their voices were not being heard. It is hard to believe that something so significantly oppressing is lost within all of the Disney magic. Therefore, it could be argued that the unrealistic expectations of Disney and it’s portrayal of relationships are unrealistic for a reason, as this is not idealistically the type of relationship or lifestyle that women are truly aspiring for.

Admittedly I’ve had my fair share of kissing a few frogs in my time and now I’m with my very own modernised Prince Charming and I mean he doesn’t have a white horse but he rides a motorbike and for me, that's pretty damn close enough.