ASAP

According to my computer time stamp, I found the above meme and saved it on my computer three years ago. I can't say I remember doing so but the evidence is clear that I felt I need to save it. Saving memes was normal but I have a specific file I keep them in. This meme was hidden in a weird file I have no memory creating. Actually, the information tucked inside the file almost feels like opening a time capsule. A capsule that I needed at this very space in time.

ASAP

I must admit, ASAP is not a positive acronyms for many workers. ASAP (As Soon As Possible.) rings in someone's head in the most derogative or annoying tone one could imagine. My sister's voice rings in my head as she would stand in her bratty boss body with her pointy nose flapping in the air, "Get it done GoGo! ASAP!" I can still see how she would snap her body as she enunciated the P with a hard emphasis. If she did it today, I would simply laugh at her and shake my head. I was taken a back a bit when I ran across this positive view of ASAP.

As Slow As Possible

Many of us rush through our days making sure everything gets done as soon as possible. I am so guilty of rushing by the amazing world we live in. I drive for a living and I have learned to stop and take the picture for one like it will never happen again. Learning to live slower feels so unnatural at first. Stopping to enjoy a hot sip of coffee in the morning will feed the soul more than the honking horns of impatient people. Slow isn't always an option but enjoy the taste of your morning coffee as you wait for the traffic to move. Slow with a purpose. Purposely find ways to enjoy more of the slow.

As Soft As Possible

Bells, whistles, phones chiming and kids yelling and playing takes a toll on the human body's stress levels. When I was a teacher, I had so much stimulus thrown at me during the day that I never rested. What is the phrase? "There's no rest for the wicked nor the weary." Weary needs soft rest. A lot of self-care moments strung together. Soft loving care for the mind, body and soul repairs the damage society throws at us. In this high paced society, finding soft is difficult. Sometimes, all I can find is a slow and even breath. If I am lucky, I can find two or three cleansing breaths in that moment.

Sometimes, one must be soft for another's well-being. I am not talking about letting someone walk all over you. I am talking about being the one person in the room who listens to the underdog. I know a coworker who gave the softest caring hugs. I can think of many times when a warm soft smile changed my whole day. Soft is often seen as kind and welcoming.

When I write, I soften the room so I can focus. Usually, one would find the room lit only with natural light. Soundscapes flash beautiful scenes across the T.V. with soothing music to fill the room. If I could, I would light a fire in the fireplace and just soak in the warmth of the orange flames. Blankets, pillows and a hot cup of tea would round out the perfect writing moment. Softness is different for everyone.

As Sustainable As Possible

Where there is a Ying there is a Yang. How one balances themselves through the dance of life, is how sustainable one is. Sustainable means capable of being maintained or continued over a long period of time, often focusing on using resources without depleting or damaging the environment.

What about sustaining one's self? Rest is my most neglected part of my life. If the balance is off, I burn out and I tend to become ill. The balance of work and rest takes effort to enforce. However, there are times where I must work so my brain can rest. Finding ways to protect your resting moments often bring the moments of genius. I can't pull up references but I have watched documentaries where Einstein and Eddison rested and often found answers during that time.

Sustaining livelihood is important. Being able to care for one's self is important. I once told my children, always be ready to stand alone. Keep a job, have your own money, maintain a car and home. (Leaning back and looking out the window at my car Goldie) I am sustaining. I may be driving a "Indian Car" but my livelihood is intact and not in danger. I am living warm, fat and safe.

Sustaining relationships is a skill that is hard to navigate at times. Everyone has the need to feel important. When I was a kid, it was important to have many friends. In the book, "Horton Hears a Who by Dr. Shultz, the major had tons of kids. I do not remember how many but in the movie, the major would give his children attention for a few minutes a piece then move onto the next. He really didn't have a relationship with any of them. He simply didn't have time to build depth and meaningful relationships. I wanted quality relationships rather than superficial non-sense. Focusing on those who fed my soul was the drive to make time and make the effort to include them into my life. Life-long friends is my goal.

As Sincere As Possible

Sincere means being free from pretense, deceit, or hypocrisy; it describes someone who is genuine or honest in their feeling, beliefs or actions. No one is perfect and a sincere person will be one who will own up to their actions. The closer and more intimate you become with another, the more you will know their qualities. I know which friends can hold a secret and who can't. I would sincerely apologize to them for not including them in planning a surprise party. Seriously, getting to know an individual is an act of intimacy. It's bond building within trusted boundaries. The excluded friend would understand your actions if they know they are valued and their inability to keep a secret is a level of protection for them too.

As Steady As Possible

Imagine with me, if you would a moment where you were taking a picture. I would like for you to take a moment to remember the event. Steady, in the midst of chaos, one must find steady to get the moment perfectly. Group photos are those pictures where there is a moment of steady. How do you get steady out of Chaos? Just say, "Everyone, say Cheese!" Everyone responds at the same time and holds steady together for a moment. A good group shot needs a steady handed photographer and the collective's will to hold still for a moment. Finding snapshots of steady in life allows one's nervous systems to calm from the chaos and softens the relationships around you.

Steady can be predictable. Steady can be a routine. Steady can be simple. Steady is the medicine to other's lives. The way you practice a steady life allows others to follow suit. Dating, for example, one studies the others characteristics, likes, dislikes to find the partner's baseline. Does those help your system to remain steady? People really become unhinged when you don't match. Look at the toilet paper issue. I don't care how it is hung, just as long as there is paper on the roller. Just replace it. That's all I care. I guess steady can be taught. Maybe.

Allow Space and Pause

Have you ever met a friend at an event where you pull in and find a place to park and there's an empty space along side of it. Your friend calls and they are running late. You open your trunk, pull out a folding chair and plunked it down in the center of the empty spot. You hear the tires crunching down the gravel so you rush to sit down to hold the spot for your friend. The car drove by because you held space for someone to come and park and spend time with you.

Holding space for someone in your life requires balance and understanding. Holding space means you allow yourself to value a person to a certain degree. There is one friend I have since high school. I can only give her good morning and goodnight text. Once in a while, we will call and talk. She doesn't require much space in my life. If she calls unexpectantly, someone else's space gets smaller so I can park and give her time and the care that only I can give. Her space is special. My children's space is special and I protect that.

Holding space for someone doesn't mean you accept long periods of abandonment or neglect. I had a friend that only got a hold of me to get discounted rooms while I was employed at the motel. No, not acceptable to me. Next time she asked for a room, I declined. I let someone else fill her parking space.

ASAP