The one where everyone is quarantined

With the recent Friends Reunion coming out, I thought it was only appropriate to daydream about an extra Friends episode. In honour of the pandemic, I present you...

The one where everyone is quarantined.

It’s April 21, 2020. Monica and Chandler’s purple apartment is quiet on the outside but quite crowded on the inside. There are bottles of hand sanitizer in each corner of the apartment. Joey plays with a paper straw while eating soup. It’s his eight meal of the day, and it’s only 2 pm.

Chandler and Ross are playing Cups, a card game. They’ve been having beers since 11 am, now their eyes are getting heavy and the game slowing down.

I win!! - Chandler jumps out of his chair and celebrates.

Dude, you have a Queen. King beats it. - Says Ross.

Do I need to inform you that we are in the 21st century and women are strong and powerful? Queen beats King.

Rachel stares out the window, taking a break from her long checklist of to-dos. She has done an hour of yoga, plucked her eyebrows, wrote in her journal, and there are many things yet to be done. Everyone is bored out of their minds.

The silence is broken by high-pitched voices:

I am taking out the trash, this is MY responsibility!

Monica, you go outside EVERY day! Let us mortals have some fun for once.

Everyone’s attention is turned to Monica and Phoebe, who are pulling at the ends of a black plastic bag. Joey joins in, wanting to take the turn to go outside too.

...And that’s when the trash bag explodes into the air, showering everyone with the remains of the litter.

Phoebe cries and lays down on the floor, hyperventilating. Chandlers stares at the guilty group while portraying a sliver of banana on the top of his head.

Can all of you dirty people stop it already! Look at Phoebe, she cannot handle this much pressure! Let this poor woman take the trash out for once, Monica.

Puffing, Monica and Joey pick up the litter and put it in a new bag. They hand it over to Phoebe, who is ready to go out the door with her cat-whisked mask.

Finally out of the apartment, Phoebe looks around. She sees no one. She decides to take off her mask for a little while, so she can breathe some pure air in the meantime. As soon as she gets to the lobby, she bumps into a good looking neighbour.

The neighbor stares at her and inquires why she is not wearing a mask, which is mandatory. But Phoebe cannot understand him, since his mask muffles his speaking. Blushing, she gives him a half-hearted smile and wishes him a good day too.

She’s convinced he’s into her. She’ll need an excuse to go to his apartment sometime, she thinks to herself. Maybe to ask for some toilet paper.

When Phoebe finishes disposing of the litter, she runs into the building manager. Suddenly, she realizes her mask is still in her pocket. In a rush to put it back on, she ends up putting it on backwards. She looks like a sad cat now, with her whiskers upside down.

Except for Monica, who is frantically cleaning underneath the living room coffee table. When Phoebe walks back in, Monica stomps her head on the table and then runs over to the door. Everyone shoots questions at Phoebe:

How was it? Is there anyone out there?

What was the weather like?

How did it feel to walk outdoors?

Phoebe lays down on the couch, hyperventilating again. She feels overwhelmed by the experience and recounts the encounter with the cute neighbour, now realizing that she had left the house in pajamas. Joey puts his arms around her and tells her that she looks great in the pajamas.

There is a knock on the door. Suddenly, there is silence. Everyone looks up. Monica tells Ross to open the door and check who it is. Ross is apprehensive. Slowly, he opens the door…

It’s the delivery woman. She has another package for Rachel Green. She needs a signature and asks how Ross is doing.

After a failed attempt at flirting with the woman about her delivering abilities and lack of ambition, Ross closes the door in disbelief of what he had just said.

Another package for you, Rach.

Ross puts the package on the huge pile of boxes behind the couch. Rachel walks over, excited by the new self-gift to get her through such troubled times.

What could you possibly have ordered that you don’t have yet? - Asks Ross.

These should be my new 3D sleeping masks! - Rachel sings.

Ugh, these are the air fresheners you ordered. - Disappointed, Rachel throws the package at Monica.

_________________________________________________

The covid-19 pandemic has been a crazy event, making us feel like our lives were on hold for over a year before vaccines were rolled out.

As we prepare to go back out into society, I wanted to document some of the feelings and happenings from the past year, while indulging in daydreaming about a new Friends episode.

If you enjoyed the story, don’t forget to leave a heart for support :-)