Every The Simpsons Treehouse of Horror - Rated and Ranked (Part Three)

Another day, another six Treehouse of Horror episodes of The Simpsons to review and rank. I'm not wasting any time with this one, so if you need a refresher, you can find Part One and Part Two right here on Vocal.

Treehouse of Horror XIII (Season 14, Episode 1)

Treehouse of Horror XIII starts with one of the best opening segments of them all, as the Simpson family host a séance so that Ned can contact his deceased wife, Maude. Thankfully, Maude is more than happy to usher in the first of the episode's three tales of terror, adding just a touch of fourth wall breaking humor to the intro.

"Send in the Clones" is billed as a riff on Multiplicity, but that is only true in that it deals with Homer creating a veritable army of clones of himself. The segment has plenty of decent visual gags and a few good jokes, though it doesn't do the best job of standing out against the rest of the crowd once the ride is over.

"The Fright to Creep and Scare Harms" is basically a Simpsons fever dream that starts with disarming the town in a bid to usher in world peace that is met with the return of the grotesquely animated Billy the Kid and several other historical ne'er-do-wells who quickly overtake Springfield. There is so much going on here that it is kind of impossible to keep up with after a certain point, yet it never ceases to be entertaining. Things get muddled once time travel enters the equation, but never enough to take away from the overall experience.

Treehouse of Horror XIII caps things off with "The Island of Dr. Hibbert," an obvious The Island of Doctor Moreau retelling that leans into The Simpsons' oft forgotten horny side to keep the story itself from ever delving too deep into the realm of horror. "The Island of Dr. Hibbert" is, in a word, wild, and only in the best of ways.

If Treehouses of Horror XIII were just a little more polished, it would be an easy top ten contender. As is, it's getting a full Kang and two-thirds of a Kodos.

Treehouse of Horror XIV (Season 15, Episode 1)

Bart and Lisa open Treehouse of Horror XIV by pouring over their trick or treat hauls, which quickly spirals into a brazen display of violence. Within seconds, every member of the Simpsons clan is at each others' throats, with Marge bringing things to an end with two blasts from her shotgun. This sets a darker than usual tone for Treehouse of Horror XIV, and while that doesn't exactly persist, it is greatly appreciated, especially as the anthology's entries continue to become less and less overtly horrifying.

Treehouse of Horror XIV dives right into its first story, "Reaper Madness," which sees Death himself descend upon the Simpson house in search of Bart, only to be beaten to death by Homer. What ensues is a tale in which Homer begrudgingly takes on Death's duties, which could have easily been an entire episode unto itself. "Reaper Madness" is a story that has been told time and time again across numerous popular series, and The Simpsons knows exactly how to navigate it.

"Frinkenstein" is another Treehouse of Horror segment that easily could have comprised its own full episode of The Simpsons, and it likely would have been better off if it did. The homage to Frankenstein is readily apparent, yet "Frinkenstein" has a lot more in common with Frankenhooker than it does any other horror story of the same ilk.

The final segment from Treehouse of Horror XIV, "Stop the World, I Want to Goof Off," makes three for three that are strong enough to carry an entire episode by themselves. When Bart and Milhouse order a magical stopwatch from the back of an old comic book, they discover that it really can stop time around them. There is a decent amoung of panic here, but not a lot of overt horror. All in all, the adventure that Bart and Milhouse go on in "Stop the World, I Want to Goof Off" is the least terrifying of the three that Treehouse of Horror XIV has to offer, and it is absolutely the weaker of them because of it. On a separate note, it is the first Treehouse of Horror short in a whole two seasons to be modeled after an episode of The Twilight Zone, specifically 1963's "A Kind of Stopwatch."

Treehouse of Horror XIV isn't quite as good as its predecessor, but it is still a strong enough anthology to earn about the same score. Let's say just a smidge more than half of a Kang and a full Kodos to haul him around.

Treehouse of Horror XV (Season 16, Episode 1)

Treehouse of Horror XV opens with another original bit, this time a clip from the sitcom I never knew I needed - Keepin' It Kodos. This absolutely makes up for the lack of Marge in the intro, and I very much wish there was more of it.

"The Ned Zone" is, as expected, a Ned Flanders-centric adaptation of The Dead Zone, which is so much better than it already sounds. The short is incredibly atmospheric despite its utter absurdity, and the tension throughout Ned's journey is consistently palpable. "The Ned Zone" is maybe the most captivating individual entry of this entire era of Treehouse of Horror episodes, and it is absolutely the best of Treehouse of Horror XV.

Next up is "Four Beheadings and a Funeral," a period piece that borrows elements from the classic Sherlock Holmes mythos as well as Alan Moore and Eddie Campbell's From Hell, all to weave a tale that is thoroughly enjoyable yet similarly forgettable. "Four Beheadings and a Funeral" is fun to be sure, it just happens to be a largely style-over-substance affair.

Last up in Treehouse of Horror XV is "In the Belly of the Boss," which starts out as an otherwise ordinary episode of The Simpsons before abruptly shifting into Fantastic Voyage territory. With Maggie lost somewhere inside Mr. Burns' body, the rest of the Simpsons are forced to shrink down and go on a fantastical rescue mission unlike any they have ever embarked upon before. There is some weird pseudo-body horror stuff going on at the end which, while not a detriment to the segment, does derail things enough that you might forget what popular movie this was supposed to be sending up in the first place.

I'm giving Treehouse of Horror XV a full Kang and about half of a Kodos. Not quite a full half, but close enough that nobody is really going to notice.

Treehouse of Horror XVI (Season 17, Episode 4)

Another Kang and Kodos cold open? Sign me up! It's mostly baseball jokes, but that's fine. I'm just glad we're getting something more than a ten-second intro sequence.

"B.I. Bartificial Intelligence" kicks things off with a story that couldn't feel more out of place. I get that this is intended to poke fun at A.I. Artificial Intelligence, and I get that it is supposed to be leaning into the whole "things would be better without Bart" trope, but "B.I." reads like a rejected episode of Futurama.

"Survival of the Fattest" is up next, which adapts Richard Connell's "The Most Dangerous Game" in a way that makes the short almost unrecognizable as an homage to the original. The same basic beats are there, yet they are consistently overshadowed by the classic Simpsons-style shenanigans that push "Survival of the Fattest" well beyond the bounds of the source of its inspiration. It might be a little boring, but it isn't bad by any means.

"I've Grown a Costume" closes things out with a loose retelling of The Twilight Zone episode "The Masks," in which a group of partygoers are cursed to have their Mardi Gras masks forever bound to their faces. This time around, a real witch in Springfield wins the town's costume contest, only to have her prize reclaimed when the truth of her existence is revealed. In turn, the witch curses everyone in Springfield to become whatever costume they are wearing, which is several steps further down the line from what the characters of "The Masks" experienced. "I've Grown a Costume" takes a couple of abrupt and absurd turns before leading into a closing Public Service Announcement from Moe who, along with everyone else, has been turned into a sentient binky by Maggie, who is also a witch.

The intro and "I've Grown a Costume" really save this one. For their efforts, Treehouse of Horror XVI scores a full Kodos, and he's bringing whatever bits of Kang he can scrape up on his way out.

Treehouse of Horror XVII (Season 18, Episode 4)

Treehouse of Horror XVII continues the trend of unique and interesting intros by putting Mister Burns into the shoes (or tomb) of the Crypt Keeper. I can appreciate this to the point that these intros are quickly becoming more important to me personally than the individual segments that follow them. As a professional, I can put that aside. As someone who isn't getting paid up front for any of this, I've decided to make it everyone's problem by letting myself ramble a bit. Deal with it.

"Married to the Blob" is ostensibly a The Simpsons remake of The Blob. Also, "ostensibly" is doing a LOT of heavy lifting in that sentence. This one is more unsettling than it is scary or funny, especially once Homer starts guilt tripping Marge into putting up with his newfound cannibalistic tendencies.

"You Gotta Know When to Golem" threw me for a few loops while following along. It begins as a loose retelling of Paul Wegener's 1920 classic The Golem: How He Came Into the World before veering into a series of tired stereotypes and lackluster one-liners. By the end of "You Gotta Know When to Golem," I was pretty sure I had watched the most racist The Simpsons episode of all time despite the fact that I do not have enough of a working knowledge of either Jewish folklore or Fran Drescher to explain why.

"The Day the Earth Looked Stupid" is another final segment that carries the rest of its respective Treehouse of Horror through to the finish. "The Day the Earth Looked Stupid" doesn't remake any The War of the Worlds film or miniseries, instead it leans into the panicked reaction that real people had when H. G. Wells' original radio play was first broadcast in 1938. Of course, The Simpsons also throws Kang and Kodos into the mix to take advantage of the situation, which brings things around to a surprisingly strong finish when held up against the rest of the episode.

I don't want to like Treehouse of Horror XVII as much as I do, and I blame "The Day the Earth Looked Stupid." It's getting half a Kang and a full Kodos.

Treehouse of Horror XVIII (Season 19, Episode 5)

Here we are, Treehouse of Horror XVIII, where nothing too exciting happens except for MARGE COMING BACK AND TELLING SCARY STORIES IN HER KITCHEN! Beyond just gleefully introducing the episode, Marge murders the various miniature versions of other Fox stars who appear in the corners of the screen as promos. This is exactly what I didn't know I wanted from a Treehouse of Horror intro, and it is perfect.

"E.T., Go Home" starts off the anthology with what starts as an E.T. satire and almost immediately spirals into the beginnings of an alien invasion. At a certain point, I became increasingly concerned that Homer was going to make love to Kang, and then I realized that, no, Kang is going to make love to Homer. When the power of love can't win the day, the power of lasers steps up to fill in that gap. This whole ride is wild, and it's mostly great.

From there, Treehouse of Horror XVIII moves on to "Mr. & Mrs. Simpson," which very nearly steals the whole show. This segment isn't so much a riff on Mr. & Mrs. Smith as it is an homage that ramps things up where a live-action feature film cannot. "Mr. & Mrs. Simpson" reaches near Itchy & Scratchy levels of violence, and it is that much the better for it.

"Heck House" brings Treehouse of Horror XVIII to a close in epic fashion, as the Bart, Lisa, Nelson, and Milhouse go from playing mean-spirited pranks on Agnes Skinner to being tortured by an infernally evangelical Flanders. This Flanders isn't outright evil like versions of the character seen in past Treehouse of Horror segments, although he might be the scariest of them all simply for how well-meaning he thinks he is.

Kang and Kodos are both here for this one. They're probably going to check their phones a couple of times during the episode, but they're here.

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That wraps things up for Part Three of my rating and review of every single The Simpsons Treehouse of Horror episode. Check back tomorrow for Part Four, and stay spooky.