Frank the Christmas Gargoyle

Frank, the Christmas Gargoyle, is, as his name namesake suggests, a gargoyle. Yet the Christmas title wasn’t part of his moniker before December 2019. Frank, a heavy stone sculpture, stood guard on Denise Starr’s porch for three years before a nosy neighbor, we'll call her Karen, began leaving notes complaining that Frank was out of step with the Christmas holiday and demanded his removal. Starr refused and instead doubled down. She topped Frank with a Santa hat, you know, to make him more festive, and added a minature Christmas tree so the Christmas sentiment wouldn't be mistaken. Karen left more notes decrying Frank’s new attire. Starr added friends to stand with Frank including, hippos and a skeleton dog, all dress for the holiday season. When COVID-19 hit, Starr added a plague doctor to the mix.

It should be noted that Frank wasn’t Starr’s first run-in with her crabby neighbor. Previously, Karen had complained about Starr’s holiday decorations, which included an inflatable hippo. Hippos are beloved by Starr, but Karen informed her that hippos aren’t Christmasy. Those Karens, they sure do know everything. Am I right?

As a means of chronicling Frank’s saga, Starr started a Facebook page. It didn’t take long for Frank to win the heart of the internet, and his story went viral. Starr decided to capitalize on Frank’s fame and began raising money for Food Bank, INC in Dayton, Ohio.

Hoping that Frank’s fan base would raise about $4k for the food bank over the month-long fundraiser might have put too little stock in Frank’s pull. Instead, the fundraiser brought in $4k in the first ten minutes. In a week, over $65k had been raised.

Starr’s pesky neighbor didn’t take kindly to Starr’s refusal to remove Frank or the addition of his new friends, nor did she care about all the good Frank was doing. Karen wrote a letter of complaint to their HOA and the mayor (neither complaint came to anything). Starr retaliate with a poster of Kevin McAllister cooly staring into the camera with the quote, “Are you guys giving up yet? Or are you thirsty for more?"

Yes, please, can we have some more? Lots more?

Since starting the Facebook page, over 700k followers have watched Frank’s saga unfold. Some have sent Starr fanart of Frank, notes of encouragement, pictures of their unconventional holiday decorations. The latter only proved Starr's assertion that not all people celebrate holidays in the same manner. To sanitize a holiday into what one person thinks is acceptable is a form of injustice, denying people their individual expression.

In lieu of cowing to Karen and removing the prized family member from his post at the front door, Starr instead decided to turn a joke into an act of charity. Frank dons any number of holiday-themed outfits throughout the year, along with intricate scenes created by Starr, and the cash keeps rolling in. Over $250k has been raised for various charities including, food banks, the Hospice of Dayton, the Gary Sinise Foundation, and the Cincinnati Zoo, not to mention people Frank inspired who gave to their local institutions.

You can join Team Frank and get in on the shenanigans by heading over to his Facebook page. You can even sport your very own Frank-themed t-shirt or blast your devices with stickers, the proceeds for which go to various charities.

Just think, if that nosy Karen hadn’t complained about Frank, Starr might not have started fundraising. So for once, we can say, “Thank you, Karen. You’re still lame AF, but thank you.”

Photo credits: All photos were used with the permission of Denise Starr.

Similar Articles

Get a Discount on Your Vocal+ Membership